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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nursery help? How does it work? Vouchers?

72 replies

Ohmygaw · 25/03/2019 13:45

Hi I have just joined and I am looking for advice, my DD is 13 months old and I am a sahm. I go to groups with her but I would like to start sending her to nursery for a few mornings a week. What do I need to do?DH works 35+ hours a week, do we get childcare vouchers etc or anything. Do I go to the nursery first or check that we get these vouchers that ppl are telling me about?thank you

OP posts:
insancerre · 26/03/2019 16:41

Op, you can start sending her to nursery whenever you like
You just have to pay for it

Dueinnov19 · 26/03/2019 16:44

The reason the government offer the 20% subsidy for nursery payments is to help and encourage people to go into work, because for many people it can cost more or the same as their wages for nursery, so means there is little point in them working.

You will need to pay for nursery which is around £60 a day depending on where you live

If you went back to work part time, so worked the days your child is in nursery then you would be eligible for the subsidy.

My dd goes in 1 day a week, and the subsidy means we basically get 1 day a month paid for which is a huge help and means I can put her in for an extra day without worrying should I need to work an extra day.

Original poster
Ohmygaw · 26/03/2019 17:06

@LIZS no child benefit either. I just think it would be nice to get SOMETHING I’m not saying I want to take back every bit of tax back either. Good god, why is it just because we have a good wage that we are not allowed to complain about benefits etc. ppl are forever complaining about Universal credits and that’s allowed l??!! 🙄

OP posts:
Original poster
Ohmygaw · 26/03/2019 17:09

And the nhs is laughable at the
Moment if I’m being honest. We have had to go private for a few things over the past 5 years 😡

OP posts:
999caffeineplease · 26/03/2019 17:10

Surely this is a troll

Anothertempusername · 26/03/2019 17:16

There seems to be an awful lot of nonsense spouted on here over the last few days.

SAHM = free childcare. HTH

burritofan · 26/03/2019 17:18

I just think it would be nice to get SOMETHING
Do you use your local library? Did you see an NHS midwife during your pregnancy? Give birth in a hospital? Get free dental care and prescriptions while you were pregnant and for a year afterwards? Get vaccinated? Get your child vaccinated? Have a health visitor and follow-up care? You might have used up all your SOMETHING

lostfrequencies · 26/03/2019 17:19

"Good god, why is it just because we have a good wage that we are not allowed to complain about benefits etc."

We? Your partner has a good wage.

mindutopia · 26/03/2019 17:21

You both have to be working to get tax free childcare (as you should). If you choose to be a sahp, enjoy your time at home. I have to work, but you don’t get that time back. If you need a break, see if you can work out a share with a friend with a child the same age. And make sure your partner gives you a break at the weekends. Or go back to work part time and then you will qualify.

Hollowvictory · 26/03/2019 17:23

And it's only 20% cheaper even if you did qualify, it's not completely free till age 3

Dueinnov19 · 26/03/2019 17:36

And even at 3 its only valid during term time and usually core hours

venusandmars · 26/03/2019 17:36

What burritofan said

WhatToDoAboutWailmerGoneRogue · 26/03/2019 17:48

What a disgraceful attitude, OP. You should be ashamed of yourself.

Benefits are for those who need them. You don’t need them, you just want them because you can’t be arsed looking after your kid full time.

Original poster
Ohmygaw · 26/03/2019 18:46

Yeah I use all of those services but probably a hell of a lot less than some so I’m hardly draining them!! Like I said we have gone private before as nhs is shocking. And all I want is one or two mornings a week that’s hardly fobbing of my child!! 🙄 oh and don’t worry I will pay for it myself!!

OP posts:
NCKitten · 26/03/2019 18:48

OP, for your own good, just leave this thread now. I hope you're being intentionally goady when comparing the misery that is UC to being a higher rate tax payer. You're also lucky you are able to afford private health-care; contrary to what you seem to think, that is a luxury rather than a necessity.

burritofan · 26/03/2019 20:00

OP, from each according to their abilities, to each according to their need. You've used the services you needed; as a SAHP you don't actually need the childcare.

I'm also confused about why you're willing to go private for medical care when you're entitled to free NHS services, but you're angry about paying for private childcare when you're not entitled to state help. Weird double standard. And the welfare state isn't a slot machine or ticking a "chicken, beef or vegetarian" option on a wedding menu; you don't get to pick and choose "Ooh, don't fancy the NHS, I'll have some nursery instead."

Original poster
Ohmygaw · 26/03/2019 20:09

@burritofan we went private due to A lot of waiting lists! Well it’s your opinion that I don’t “need” childcare. I say I do as DH works away quite a bit, we have no family nearby at the moment so I need a little bit of downtime, but as I have stated I will pay for it. It’s just the typical attitude of “oh you have money so you can’t complain” I can’t stand!

OP posts:
hazeyjane · 26/03/2019 20:10

It would be nice to get something back??! 🙄

Well you have the privilege of not having to work and being able to spend the first few years of your child's life at home with them. You also have said you can afford private healthcare so I'm guessing if you want to send your dd to nursery for a couple of mornings a week, then you can.

Good god, why is it just because we have a good wage that we are not allowed to complain about benefits

You are on a good wage....I think you are getting confused between benefits and perks

HermioneKipper · 26/03/2019 20:10

Hahaha this has to be a troll?! And a stupid one at that!

Barrenfieldoffucks · 26/03/2019 20:18

Nice try, this opinionated but no idea about how to find this information without coming to AIBU?!

If you need a break from your single baby then pay for it. 🤷

burritofan · 26/03/2019 20:18

Ah, you "need" childcare like I "need" a salted caramel brownie and a foot rub right now, or my 6-year-old niece neeeeeeeeeeeeeeds a glittery pot of slime from a museum gift shop...

Original poster
Ohmygaw · 26/03/2019 20:36

Aibu was the first chat room to pop up so I opted for it...clearly the wrong place!! 🙄

OP posts:
hazeyjane · 26/03/2019 20:37

To be honest I think the response might have been similar wherever you put it!

alwaysreadthelabel · 26/03/2019 20:47

We have a combined income of 38k and we both work 37 hours a week. The 20% we get from tax free childcare is the only thing keeping us afloat!

You have no need for childcare, you will get your turn when your child is 3.

As for getting something back. The minimum of £1200 that having your child cost the NHS is probably a start of getting some of it back!

Brummiegirl15 · 26/03/2019 20:49

Thing is, even if you did work, you wouldn’t get any help until your child turned 3 anyway! And you’d get 30 hours but only if you both work.

If only one of you works then you just get the 15 hours at age 3.

So, yes as others said the only way you’ll get nursery is to pay for it.

And I say that as someone who doesn’t get child benefit. But I also work and therefore our 3 year old gets 30 hours. But we also have a 17 month old and the month before our eldest turned 3 our nursery bill for 3 days a week for both was £1600. No help, no child benefit. It is what it is.