AIBU

[Cleanupthekitchen]

I am a grandmother and also a mother. I lost my son of 39 years a year ago. He is the father of my grandchildren. His ex wife their Mother is saying I cannot see them because I remind them too much of their father. They are 13 and 15. Am I being unreasonable to expect to see them?

That’s horrible OP, I feel for you. What a horrid thing of her to say.
Not sure what can be done though as I think grandparents have no legal right to see their GC.

If that’s their wish (the children’s) I think maybe you should respect it for now, they’re grieving too. Can you stay in touch by sending birthday/Christmas/postcards etc, let them know they’re in your thoughts and you’d love to see them when they’re ready? If you had a good relationship before they might well want to see you again in their own time.

I’d give them time but let them know you are always there. I’m so sorry for your loss.

That's awful, so sorry OP.

FWIW I'm sure that this will be temporary. They're grieving and not thinking clearly.