To feel overwhelmed with weaning?

[Mississippilessly]

DS is 6 months. I've just started weaning him. We give him 2 meals a day, one BLW and one mashed.

I'm so stressed by it. He is teething and doesn't like being put down. I dont feel I have the time to prepare food for him and clean up. Often he manages a few nins in his high chair then cries and ive gone to loads of effort.
I'm stressed about his iron levels. We think he might have a gluten or egg intolerance. I've found a gluten and egg free bread which he has enjoyed but I've just seen it's got honey in it. I've got the Annabel Karmel book in front of me and it says he should be on 3 meals a day - the planner includes has several components to each meal. How can I possibly prepare all of that?
He doesn't sleep well at night so I'm getting very little sleep.
I'm tired and teary and exhausted.
Please help.

OhyesIam that's exactly how I feel.

Thank you everyone. I've calmed down a bit. Every stage is terrifying!

Firstly, I'm sure you're doing brilliantly & as long as your baby is still taking milk, then he'll be absolutely fine. Give yourself a break, tell Annabel Karmel to sod off with her bloody charts & planners & just try whatever works for you/your son - at your own pace- you've got plenty of time. It will all fall into place - don't worry!

For what it's worth, I just bumbled along, trying all sorts of things depending on what we were doing, where we were, my son's mood, my energy levels, etc! That meant that some days he'd have a few bits of fruit or cooked veggies or fingers of toast etc which he'd play around with, mush into his hair & up his nose, throw on the floor for the dog & occasionally actually eat, while other days I'd attempt to teaspoon some pureed concoction into him before once again letting him cover himself in it!! I kept up with his bottles of milk to start with & then gradually decreased the amount he had as his food intake increased. Some days he just wasn't in the mood so it was 100% milk & we tried again the following day. I started with breakfast - it seemed easiest - he used to have a few spoons of baby porridge or cereal, mixed up with milk, which he took to quite well.

You'll soon find your own rhythm & work out what he prefers etc. You'll make mistakes along the way & spend bloody ages cleaning all manner of gloop from your walls, floors & child's hair, but it'll all be fine in the long run. Promise!

The best bit of advice is to try to stop stressing about it & ignore all the "you should be doing this..." type crap from other people!!

Good luck! X

BlackCat86 thanks.this is going to sound rude and I dont mean it to but we have had different experiences of babyhood so far I think. I seem to remember you from sleep threads and you successfully followed the Little Ones programme.

I still cant get DS to sleep anywhere really apart from on me. And when I do all I can do is sleep.

I feel like I'm failing at everything.

At 6months I dont think you need to worry about real meals. Just some food to try while you eat we found boiled carrots or potatos as mash or finger food when its dinner time maybe a pear or banana at lunch let them squeeze it and smooch it, some will get tasted and thats all that matters. we kept some tinned fruit as they were always ripe and ready to eat for wee ones.
Then you can try cheese or yogurts and once he is sitting happier in the high chair an knows he will get food, give him a bit of your dinner spagetti bolognese was always a winner!

You're not failing. Don't compare yourself to others- it just makes you feel shit. X

Two words...... Ella's kitchen

Just use the Ella's purées in the beginning - it's soul destroying to prepare such tiny amounts for them to refuse.

You can batch cook later when you get time.

With my first I was very careful about trying foods individually and monitoring salt and sugar intake and it was very stressful like you describe. With my second and third I didn't have time to worry and so they just had bits of what we're eating from the start. I would fork mash whatever we were eating and also give them little pieces to pick up. It has made weaning so much less stressful and they seem to be fine!

I had the AK book and wasted hours of my life puréeing fruit and veg for a month or two, with mixed success. We then discovered Ella's pouches and didn't look back! So easy for when you're out and about and handy to keep at home. There are so many flavours so DS never got bored. Obviously he didn't just have those. He liked pasta, fruit, yoghurts, etc. The turning point for him was when he started nursery at 10 months. I was amazed at what he ate! Don't worry, OP. It sounds as though you are doing an amazing job. Hang on in there xx

I was feeling ok until I read that fucking book!!!

He has given most things a good go so far. I kept some of our dinner aside and mushed it which has done 3 little tins for the freezer and some for tomorrow. BLW is making me anxious but he does enjoy it. I think I'm afraid of repeating foods but essentially toast and porridge are breakfast!

He is still EBF and pretty hefty do I'm not worried about his weight.

Thank you everyone. Not sure I'd be getting through this without MN.

They're still so little at 6 months, and as they get older they pick stuff up so quickly! My DS's slept well (sorry) at that age and so I could never have fitted in three meals plus bottles.

I sat them in the high chair every time I ate, and gave them a bit of what we were having. DS 2 had fish pie as his first meal - you'd be surprised what they can do with mashed potato!

I also sat them in the high chair and plonked food in front of them if we had half an hour spare, or if I was preparing some other meal, or if I wanted to tidy the kitchen. Keep leftovers in the fridge, so you can put something in front of them instantly - cold roast potatoes, carrots, pasta, pie, chicken - anything and everything! It's all fun at this stage.

And most of all, don't worry. They'll get the hang of it eventually, and there is no rush.

Op my dd would never have eaten 3 meals a day at that age. She was not interested st all, and I saw other people's babies eating things and I felt like the worst mum in the world. She's 20 months now and I still sometimes struggle to get 3 'proper' meals in her, but she's eating, and as long as it's (sort of) balanced, I can't stress myself out about it anymore. I was driving myself mad.

Throw the book away op! .....Or give it to a charity or something more ethical

Ditch the mush! You’re not BLW if you do that anyway.
Just throw a bit of whatever you are having on the highchair tray and leave them to it!

I stressed so much about weaning with my son. I had all these booklets about how he should be doing X at X months and when it didn't go to plan I'd panic. It is really overwhelming! My mum friend said that up until 12 months food is literally for fun as long as they're getting their milk, so I stopped worrying about it too much and gave him a bit of steamed veg or fruit to play with here and there, and he ended up doing most of the work himself as he got older. He now eats like a little pig and likes to try new things so in our case not adhering to any expert advice didn't do any harm. I particularly enjoyed skipping the X number of meals a day advice as having the food that I lovingly cooked thrown at me multiple times a day was getting a bit old, so I decided to do one solid meal a day minimum, and if I could be bothered I'd try another one. In the end I learned to listen to my son and by 10-ish months we had a bit of a solid food routine going on. No need to rush it if you're struggling (although I can get you would want to hurry if baby isn't sleeping well).

I didn't know how to cook from scratch before I had my child so it was a bit of a learning opportunity for me too. I didn't exclusively BLW but I got the BLW cookbook and it was full of easy, quick and healthy recipes and I still use it (son is almost 2,5) and would recommend it. Good luck OP! You'll get the hang of it soon.

At 6 months we typically only did one solid a day. Avocado day! Sweet potatoes. Cantaloupe! Etc. they really don’t need much.

I personally hate mashed food for myself. The idea to cook and then mash it up for DD caused so much stress I was relieved to discover BLW.

It didn’t help thatDD hated solids, was tongue-tied and needed an operation at 9 months.

So, I ignored the HV who insisted that without spoon feeding DD would never eat from a spoon, ever in her life. I just popped her into her high chair, gave her a bit of toast or rice cakes to nibble, some fruit and veg and offered a spoon with porridge, cereals or yoghurt, so thing I eat with a spoon, and with 10 months she decided Italian food is the way forward by raiding my plate if cannelioni.

Throw Annabelle Kramer out of the house or check the toddler meals, they are not too bad but I refused to cook twice a day.

Unless your baby has health problems the iron level do not suddenly go empty. Give her milk as usual and food when you eat, forget timing and feed replace,ents.

Another one saying ignore Annabel Karmel! She was annoying when I was weaning my DC in the 90s & it seems she hasn't changed

YANBU. I found every new stage utterly overwhelming. My DD was prem and had reflux, it took until 6 months for me to get a good routine of breastfeeding, medication and sleep that didn't involve being on me. When the HV suggested introducing food i burst into tears on her and wailed "but I've only just got the hang of this routine, i can't learn a new one".

Your baby will be getting all he needs from milk at this stage. So if only one teaspoon of carrot mush passes his lips each day, that's fine. It's just introducing flavours and textures.

I found it easier to batch prepare at the weekend when DH could watch DD for an hour. Cook a load of different fruit and veg, puree, then freeze in ice cube trays. Turn out the cubes into labelled plastic bags and boom, two weeks worth of food. Mostly orange - sweet potato, butternut squash, carrot - or yellow - apple, pear. As he eats more, just defrost more cubes, mix up the flavours. Try adding some green ones - DD liked peas but not broccoli.

if that feels like too much, get the pouches, decant those into ice cubes instead so you're not wasting a big pouch if all he'll eat is a teaspoon - always easy to defrost another cube or twobif he's enjoying something.

11 years down the line and I'm not sure parenting gets any easier, but you do learn to handle the changing nature of it a bit easier. Take it easy, you're doing great.

OhyesIam me too. It doesn't get easier, each stage is just a different sort of stressful.

OP I've got to start weaning baby no 2 in a few weeks and I'm dreading it. I can't remember much from when I weaned baby No1 as it was five years ago and was mostly a blur of sleep deprivation.

What I do remember is the Annabel Fucking Kamel book that some helpful person told me I "must" follow, I remember spending ages blending fruit and veg and fish and whatever the hell AFK told me to blend and spooning it into little ice cube trays only for it to end up in baby's hair or all over the floor, I remember feeling inadequate when other Mums were banging on about Baby Led Weaning because I was too terrified of my baby choking to try it. Basically, I remember feeling stressed.

I'm determined not to worry so much this time. I'm going to try to remember the "under one is just for fun" mantra and go with the flow (not really in my nature!) because life is stressful enough.

Sounds like you're doing really well! Ignore Annabel Karmel and sleep programmes - I've had 2 sleepers and 2 non sleepers and think a lot of it is down to their temperament, and also had 3 big eaters and turns out my 7 month old is my first picky eater... So much is down to them and not anything you are doing right or wrong. All you can do is follow your instincts and try to listen to them and what they need.

Have you tried porridge fingers? Lots of good recipes if you Google and they have been my one go to for blw, especially with banana (even fussy ds4 eats that one), all the goodness of porridge with less mess.

For the blw I'd also strongly suggest finding ways to incorporate elements of family meals into what your baby eats. It's good for them to be eating the same as the rest of the family (or any adult who eats with them), and saves tears if they choose not to eat it. It's also a good incentive to cut back on salt or junk in your own food! For example, we make chicken stir fry, but before adding the sauce, take out some of the veg and chicken - voila, blw meal ready. Similarly for a pasta sauce with lots of veggies and beans - make sure the pasta is not to Al dente and baby can join you. Same goes for meatballs, or burgers, or frittata. I also buy those big bags of frozen broccoli and cauliflower florets, they're easy to prep and easy for babies to hold and gnaw on.
Then if you're doing purees, you can make a family meal again and just puree it - like a shepherds pie, or a chickpea curry with rice. On a really crap day, mash up some plain avocado and plain ripe banana or pear and you've done a meal, with no cooking

If you have reason to suspect coeliac disease or egg allergies, these are both really serious and need to be confirmed, speak to your gp. If not, intolerances are really rare, but ironically you can increase the chances of them by cutting allergens out of your baby's diet. Babies who are not exposed to things like peanuts, eggs or milk in the early months of weaning have much higher rates of allergies.
Good luck and you are doing well! Have fun with it ☺️

Ditch the book! I did puree with my first and blw with second both have their plus and minus. I suggest do one meal where you can sit and feed him and concentrate on him, and the other just give him what you are eating and he can him it while you get baby free dinner!

Breakfast ideas: porridge, toast, banana, scrambled eggs, Yog and fruit (puree or not).

At this age it's not about the meals but trying new tastes and getting used to the idea did isn't just milk. It can be fun but when they push a plate of pasta in the floor it can be so frustrating too!

He could also be having a growth spurt which may add to the non sleeping. Just grab sleep when you can it needs to be a priority.

I'm reading everything you are saying whilst rocking a crying baby back to sleep (another failure).
You've all calmed me right down. Thank you. Today he has tried pineapple, orange, rice cake and toast with coconut oil and ground almonds. Yesterday he had sweet potato with tuna and took the spoon off me to feed himself (I think I was too slow!).
I'm annoyed I've let the book crush me so much as I felt we were doing quite well, he has tried loads of things and is getting happier eating and we've only been going 3 weeks. So far he has tried orange, apple, pineapple, blueberries, raspberries, spinach, tomato, potato, sweet potato (mashed and fingers), peppers, courgette, peas, avocado, carrots, broccoli, cucumber, chicken, beef, tuna, spaghetti bolognese, fish pie, toast, pasta, porridge, Greek yoghurt, cheese.

Ok I'm going to say weaning is going well then.
Sleep is another matter. But tomorrow is another day.

I think you’re making your life harder by trying to do one meal mashed and the other blw. If you’re doing blw (as opposed to just offering some finger food) they need the practice to actually pick up the food and I believe it can confuse them a bit if you try and mix methods because with one you’re in control and with the other they are. I’d pick whichever method you’re most comfortable with and go with one rather than trying to mix and match.

The sling is your friend!