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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Care work

126 replies

Catmum52 · 18/03/2019 15:52

Hi there, I quit my job as a care assistant after 6 months. Absolutely hated it!!! Not being funny but I'm better than this, I have a law degree but after having my son, realised a career in Law wasn't for me.
I love education and I love working with children, I'd like to be an Early Years Educator but at 52 am I too old?? I feel like I don't know what to do with myself anymore. There we are I've vented.

OP posts:
gettofuckthrees · 18/03/2019 17:10

Is it bad I'll be looking out for the post next year titled:

"Early Learning Workers

I have quit my role as an early learning practitioner, not ring funny but I had to wipe bums and noses and I'm actually better than this. I have a law degree"

WhereDoWeGo · 18/03/2019 17:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Stinkycatbreath · 18/03/2019 17:12

YABU as you think having a degree makes you better than those who don't.

morningstress · 18/03/2019 17:13

@gettofuckthrees why on earth waste time and money on a PhD if you're happy in your job being paid lower wage than you deserve?

I think it's sad you have some many qualifications yet you don't want to progress.

InsertFunnyUsername · 18/03/2019 17:14

Anyone who thinks they are above care work should quit, so you're doing the right thing OP.

When people are at their most vulnerable and rely on people to help them, its better if that person actually cares Hmm

I couldn't do it, not because im oh so clever but it takes a lot of compassion, patience and emotional strength to do what they do. Im grateful for them tbh.

flowersinthebedroom · 18/03/2019 17:16

People who say, "I'm not being funny but.." know they are cause offence but don't care.

evilharpy · 18/03/2019 17:22

My friend has a psychology degree and was a care worker for years. She adored her job and was great at it, and was gutted when she had to give it up due to health reasons. She never felt that she was too good for it.

I couldn’t do it. I have a string of professional qualifications but I’m not too good for care work - I’m not good enough for it. I’d take many types of work if I needed the money but I know I’d struggle emotionally with care work and seeing people at their most vulnerable.

gettofuckthrees · 18/03/2019 17:24

@morningstress please don't feel sad. I am progressing through learning about subjects which I really enjoy learning about and perhaps researching through embarking on a phd. I only mentioned my qualifications in response to the OPs suggestion that her qualification in law made her better than care work, as in my view it certainly does not!

A person has every right to spend their hard earned money on whatever they want and I don't feel you need to feel sad about what I choose to spend mine on.

In the meantime I have a rewarding, challenging job which only continues to broaden my views and practice my patience and understanding of people around me. Which I genuinely enjoy.

MockneyReject · 18/03/2019 17:24

I'm a care worker, and not offended by the OP.

I work for a private care company, and I'm frequently messed about, receive my rota at the last minute, am expected to walk from one venue to another a mile away, within 5 minutes, training has been minimal, I have one uniform, which I'm expected to wash and dry every night, I'm knackered and I'm paid minimum wage. Between us, we're expected to cover 16 hours, 7 days a week.

I think I'm better than this!

But, sadly, this is the value our society places on it's most vulnerable members, and the (mostly) women, who care for them.

Frequency · 18/03/2019 17:25

OP if your law degree is so prestigious it makes you a better class of person than others why aren't you working in the legal field?

Also, I think you'll find the same problems with early years as you do with care. Both jobs require patience and compassion, the latter of which you seem to be lacking in. Perhaps try a job that doesn't involve dealing with people.

Sleepyblueocean · 18/03/2019 17:28

Care work if done properly is a demanding, skilled role. It's better you are not doing it anymore because I wouldn't want anyone who thinks they are better than it, caring for my son.

Governoress86 · 18/03/2019 17:28

I was a carer for 10 years, looking after people with dementia. I had to take 4 years break due to my mental health. I have just got a job of community care worker which I am looking forward to starting.

Care work is damn hard and most carers are underappreciated and under paid. I love being a carer. Let's hope you don't need someone to care for you when your older.

JockTamsonsBairns · 18/03/2019 17:28

I spent many many years as a care worker, despite having a first class degree in Economics. Quite frankly, the three years I spent working in banking brought me into contact with the most insufferable people I have ever had the misfortune to meet - and I was bored out of my clearly thick skull.
I arrived into care work almost by accident, but I spent 20+ happy years working extremely hard out in the community, looking after society's most vulnerable members. I was never bored - as I do like to think I was very good at my job. Yes, it was enormously challenging both mentally and physically, but i was fortunate enough to come into contact with hundreds of elderly people, each with their own fascinating story to tell. What a privilege, and one I'll never forget.
Some truly horrible comments on this thread, so disrespectful to the important role that care workers play.

CanILeavenowplease · 18/03/2019 17:31

Please don’t go into teaching. Your sense of superiority is awful. We all have strengths and weaknesses. Education isn’t everything. Plenty of uneducated people are incredibly articulate and earn millions and lives happy, fulfilled lives. Most of us are somewhere in between. As an educator you need to see the potential in every student, not just the ones that seem to be the same as you.

staydazzling · 18/03/2019 17:31

I once posted a thread hoping it could be a support for current or ex care workers, it got radio silence with views like this im not surprised Sad bin men get more respect.

SosigisAndCornflourSauce · 18/03/2019 17:31

Nice first post, and you sound a twat OP.

Cockadoodledooo · 18/03/2019 17:39

I think your clients deserved better than you op, not the other way around. With that attitude I'm glad you quit.
There are very few professions that enable you to be with someone at their lowest and most vulnerable moments, and personally I think if you are not able to treat those people with the dignity and respect they deserve (which you won't with such a sense of superiority) then you absolutely should not be in that role.

Tensixtysix · 18/03/2019 17:40

The OP is being very unfair on care workers. I did it for 9 months and believe you me, it's the hardest job ever!
I've been a registered childminder, worked in an office for 15 years as a claim adjuster and worked for myself.
But with care work, you have to put in 100% of your energy into it and at the end of the day you think of the clients, not just the money.
I ended up giving up because of incompetent management and the driving around all day was taking a toll on my old car.
We will all need care one day.
Let's appreciate people that do this job and stop putting 'earning power' above 'impact to people's lives'.
Good carers are like gold dust!

bloodywhitecat · 18/03/2019 17:41

I work in a children's hospice as a carer, so yeah, thanks OP.

hiyababy · 18/03/2019 17:42

Bit offensive, I've worked in care for 17 years

Justheretogiveaviewfrommyworld · 18/03/2019 17:51

OP, you do realise some of the people you would have been caring for will have degrees don't you? All of those you have been working witth would love not to need to have you in their homes. Your I am better than tthis attitude towards others is horrible and not sometthing I would have liked my children to be taught. I'm genuinely Angry about your postt.

OutwithMyRemit · 18/03/2019 17:52

I'm better than this

Better hope there are plenty of those worse-than-you people around if you ever need care one day, then Hmm

GandolfBold · 18/03/2019 17:53

What is your AIBU? What was the point of posting, just to irritate people?

Its no wonder with a n attitude like that you didn't last as a carer. I don't think you are too old to be an EYP, but I don't think you have the right skills, empathy, tact and modesty are all lacking.

GandolfBold · 18/03/2019 17:54

And I say that as a carer who is currently studying for a degree via distance learning. Any job is what you make it.

Luckily the service users only had to put up with you and your attitude for 6 months!

Foodylicious · 18/03/2019 17:55

I've done this job in one form or another since I was 16.

I'm now 39 and a registered nurse, grade equivalent to 'sister'.

However my current role is not 'better' than when I was a care assistant.

Sadly I get a little more respect than when I was a care assistant. And yes I do get paid more.

I have had the honour and the privilege of working with people (service users/patients/carets/families) at their most vulnerable.
Yes it includes some hard graft and dealing with some unpleasant and challenging situations.
But to have been able to sit with people and listen to their biggest fears, do every day activities with them, support them and their carers through their mental health, physical pain and ultimately sat with many through their last days and minutes, I am truly grateful.

I am so very glad that you are no longer in this type of work.