To think that bullies often do well at work?

[malificent7]

Of course their are some lovely people who rise to the top by being legends: hard work, creative, good with people and make fair leafers.
Other people with so called 'alpha' personalities get their by force and squashing others.
I have seen it before where being a manager turns people into bullies by the bature of the role: to keep people in order and boss them around.
Obviously this is a massive generalisation.
Im an introvert and find politics a struggle so it is harder for me. I do put on a sunny persona and interact well but i think people sense im not a natural alpha type!

Fair leaders even!

In some cases, sadly, yes. Or being in management brings out the bully in them.

My ex manager was the first member of staff in my then very small company. He was automatically made manager of the two of us who joined subsequently.

I have always got on with him very well, but he essentially didn't have to manage me. I turned up, cracked on, and did well. However, he bullied the other guy shamelessly. He just had no strategies to handle the fact he didn't like him personally, or to address his poor performance.

Time passed, we grew, more staff joined. All of them put under his management - some he liked, some he didn't. You can imagine how it went with the ones he didn't. Whether he liked you or not, nobody liked how he treated the others. Yet in spite of the repeated infractions, he was continually promoted and conciliated.

He has ended up so conceited that it wasn't surprising at all that he began to turn his attitude upon his managers - who were even more cowed!

Meanwhile, I was promoted, carried out different roles. We were both offered promotion to the highest level. For whatever reason, he turned it down, and I am now his manager. For the first time in years, he turned his nasty attitude on me. It was the shock of his life when he got smacked down for it.

YANBU.

The people at the top in my industry (care) got there not because they are more intelligent or harder working than me but because they didn't care who they trampled on in order to get there.

Yes. I've seen it. I am in education too. I have seen grown adults, who are supposedly educating children not to do this, act as horrible bullies. In religious schools too. A clever and charming bully can certainly do well.

thinkhappythoughts. i work as a minion in a school and have done for nearly 10 years now and i';ve watched fairly nice ordinary people have promotion or work in the offices and become bullies as time moves on.
People do get trampled on, bullies are doing well in the work place sad to say.

I think a lot of the time it’s because it’s easier for ‘management’ to promote a bully to get them away from the situation they’ve created rather than knuckle down and deal with it. The people being bullied are relieved because they are being left alone so drop any complaint. Give it a couple of years and they get promoted again for the same reason. Leaving behind swathes of traumatised staff who all see bad behaviour being rewarded with more money. (can you tell I’m speaking from bitter experience...?)

macarrronmayhem, this goes on in my dh's place all the time. the ones with the bad attitude climb the ladder, the decent ones tend to stay where they are watching all the bullies getting all the glory.

thecatsthecats Good for you! and I hope as his manager you are addressing his shitty attitude to the people he manages.