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AIBU?

separated parent trouble

29 replies

Storm84 · 14/03/2019 22:01

Can any one give me some advice or help?

I split from my husband 3 years ago, when we split he worked nights so we agreed that he would have the children every Sunday from 10am till Monday morning 7:30am and every Wednesday from 5pm for an hour for dinner. Within 6 months to a year he came off nights so i said he could have them every other weekend from 5pm Friday evening to Sunday evening at 5:30pm. This was not good enough and he took me to court to fight to have them the weekend and every Wednesday overnight plus 3 whole weeks through the year 1 to include a week over xmas then every other bank holiday.
i agreed to all apart from every Wednesday over night as i thought this would be to much coming and going for the children.
So the above was agreed with every other Wednesday being an over night stay.

After a year he decided this was not good enough and he wanted every Wednesday over night and to not bring the children home on a Sunday till 7:30 pm then aged 6 and 10 year, i thought this was late for a Sunday evening to then have to get them ready for school the next morning. He said if i didnt agree he would just take me to court so i agreed to 7pm and every Wed over night.
Yet again a year later this is not enough he now wants them 50% of the time and i am braking down. What are your thoughts?

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krankykittykat · 15/03/2019 17:27

Why should he pay towards your morgatge and bills. He doesn't live there and has his own household bills 🤷‍♀️

If he wants 50/50 then personally i think you should be responsible each for buying clothes etc for your own houses and each parent pay any costs for what the children need for when they are staying at theirs and no maintainance.

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Waveysnail · 15/03/2019 17:36

If he's wanting 50:50 he doesn't have to pay anything!

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CheshireChat · 15/03/2019 17:39

There's actually a nursery where they use proper tools, I think it's ace. Also my 4 yo gets to use the glue gun without me holding it, he's fine.

Is there any reason you feel it's bad for the kids?

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Lazypuppy · 15/03/2019 21:55

He shouldn't be paying any of your bills.
If he has them close to 50%, there is no maintenance due to you, or vice versa.
Google montessori.