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To think ALL women should read this! (Shark Cage)

21 replies

Newyeardontcare · 10/03/2019 18:03

Never knew about this until yesterday (thank you mumsnet) I think ALL women (girls and parents) should read this...

In fact, all people!

shark cage

OP posts:
SouthWestmom · 10/03/2019 18:32

OMG 8 pages of tiny print. What is it about?

Guineapiglet345 · 10/03/2019 18:41

Very interesting, I can definitely recognise myself as a ‘Sally’ and I’ve known ‘Chantelle’s, it’s so important to make sure our children have a strong sense of self worth.

elQuintoConyo · 10/03/2019 18:45

PDF won't open on my phone. Do you have a link? What is it?

TheNavigator · 10/03/2019 18:49

It is about understanding the psychology of abused women. Long and tiny print so I didn't bother reading it. May be useful for victims of abuse, I don't know.

SouthWestmom · 10/03/2019 18:54

Just googled it. A metaphor for protection against predators.
As a survivor of an abusive marriage I'd like to see more for the bloody men and less for the women. Sorry that's probably unpopular on here but as I get older I'd just like other people to behave better and not expect me to get better at spotting them or protecting myself.

FriarTuck · 10/03/2019 18:59

I was expecting details of a good shark movie. I'm disappointed.

MitziK · 10/03/2019 19:01

Lots of warble in it.

Basically, it explains that some people have learned to protect themselves against predators/abusers to the extent that they don't manage to insinuate themselves into their lives, because every attempt to breach a boundary is noted and resisted.

Others haven't been given those tools, so are more vulnerable.

The key to not getting into successively abusive relationships is to learn to recognise those boundaries and repel the predators before they are harmed mentally or physically. To recognise that they don't have to accept attention when they feel uneasy, that they have the right to make their own decisions, etc, etc.

The Big Bang Theory explained it as not having an effective deflector shield, like on the Starship Enterprise. It's the same principle.

Hope that saves a few people the effort of sorting through the chaff.

MitziK · 10/03/2019 19:08

@Noeuf, perhaps if you wished to use the same metaphor, you could perhaps, rather than see sharks, visualise the abusive woman as and incredibly beautiful fish. They look harmless, so they get in and then turn out to be venomous.

The fact is that there will always be predators. Fact of life on earth.

Same as there will always be bacteria, fungi and viruses. Many are completely harmless, some are beneficial - and some are deadly. This shark cage idea is having a healthy immune system to repel infection - eating right, hygiene, avoiding obvious contamination, still being careful when it isn't obvious, getting vaccinated, treating cuts and wounds immediately, recognising when there is a serious disease and avoiding completely or going immediately to the GP when you've been in contact with it.

thedisorganisedmum · 10/03/2019 19:08

I thought it was about swimming with sharks when you have your periods.

I am seriously disappointed too.

Newyeardontcare · 10/03/2019 19:16

It's pdf, so you can zoom in...

OP posts:
Newyeardontcare · 10/03/2019 19:17

@thedisorganisedmum lol and wtf!! 🤣

OP posts:
youaremyrain · 10/03/2019 19:27

Its very interesting. I like the detail and the metaphor is very helpful

joggerbottom · 10/03/2019 19:34

Noeuf-

I get what you are saying. The real problem here is how some people can't see their predatory nature or care about the emotional toll on others when they cross boundaries.

elQuintoConyo · 10/03/2019 19:36

What about Sharknado where they come at you from all angles?

MitziK · 10/03/2019 20:06

Sharknado? That sounds like a normal weekend in the town centre.

youaremyrain · 10/03/2019 20:32

@Noeuf morally and ideally, yes, it's the men that need to change. Realistically though?
The author of the article points out that the shark cage model was developed in response to women asking why they keep being targeted so it works in that respect

Grumpelstilskin · 10/03/2019 20:40

*thedisorganisedmum Are we possibly related...?

I thought exactly the same regarding not swimming when you got your period. I also read a crime story how someone murdered their partner by placing a hidden blood soaked tampon in their surfing outfit... Grin

thedisorganisedmum · 10/03/2019 21:01

Grumpelstilskin
GrinGrinGrin

but that's it, I am never going swimming again

SouthWestmom · 10/03/2019 21:18

@MitziK literally no clue what you're on about.
And no, I don't want to use any metaphor I'd just like people to stop being arseholes.

MitziK · 10/03/2019 22:19

Well, @Noeuf, that's never going to fucking happen.

The only thing people can do is learn tools to be able to avoid/escape the worst ones.

PissOffPeppa · 10/03/2019 22:30

I thought it was about swimming with sharks when you have your periods

Me too!

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