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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Who was unreasonable? Dog walking issue..

81 replies

WillGymForPizza · 09/03/2019 09:59

I'm currently looking after my parents dog while they are away for the weekend, took him out for a nice long walk this morning, bumped into lots of other dogs had a sniff, all fine.

Only the way back we found ourselves approaching an elderly lady with a Jack Russell, I put dog on very short lead told him to 'stay' as we passed them but he still sort of moved forward to sniff the other dog, as dogs do. It's nature. Now I should say, and I know everyone says this, but parents is as soft as a brush and just want to be everyone's friend. The lady started shouting at me ' get that bloody dog away, I apologised told him off and said he wasn't nasty. Then I move to cross the road and she started shouting at me that 'the bloody thing needs locking up'. Ffs he's lab not a pit bull, he didn't bark, he didn't growl, he didn't jump at her, he just moved to sniff her dog! Like they all do!

It was unnecessarily aggressive and rude and really spoiled what was a lovely walk. I had to resist the urge not to give her a mouthful back, but thought against it. Sounds stupid but it puts me off taking him out again! And now I'm wondering if maybe I did do something wrong?

Can any seasoned dog people tell me what the hell it was all about?

OP posts:

Elizabeth2019 · 09/03/2019 11:01

Some dog owners are dicks, others are nervous but not really a reason to avoid going out. Most dog walkers are reasonably nice 😀

My JR is a proper douche at times, super nervous randomly then overtly friendly at others - I just try to warn other owners that she can be nervous and bark a lot which might scare a puppy.

JRMisOdious · 09/03/2019 11:01

Offensive how, no-one should have a pit bull?

MrsJayy · 09/03/2019 11:03

Sorry just put it behind you and don't worry btw your parents dog might be friendly but she didn't know that.

MrsJayy · 09/03/2019 11:04

My dog barked in the face of a puppy this morning poor baby jaydog is a bit of an arsehole

PUGaLUGS · 09/03/2019 11:14

It was her not you.

JRMisOdious · 09/03/2019 11:15

Our’s is an old girl now, 12 in June, and increasingly impatient with bouncy pups. She tolerates for a couple of minutes, gives a warning growl and looks imploringly at me: her eyes are saying “please, bloody kids”

florriepeck · 09/03/2019 11:24

This would upset me, too (dog owner), as confrontations play on my mind.
But you did nothing wrong: try to put it out of your mind, and enjoy the rest of your dog minding weekend.

MrsJayy · 09/03/2019 11:24

bloody kids

BlindAssassin1 · 09/03/2019 11:27

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

werideatdawn · 09/03/2019 11:27

Offensive to pit bulls oh yes, that beloved and popular family friendly breed of dog...

OP don't worry about it. I've realised since getting my dog, dog people are either the nicest people you'll meet or the absolute weirdest. No middle ground!

Original poster

WillGymForPizza · 09/03/2019 11:31

It's very social walking the dog isn't it? Apart from this woman, I met a couple of spaniels, a sheepdog and whippet. All lovely, and happy to sniff/be sniffed.

OP posts:

mcmooberry · 09/03/2019 11:33

She sounds totally unhinged, you behaved entirely correctly putting your dog on a short lead, Hope you will get a chance to bump into her again and put her right (but I suspect she is not one to be reasoned with....)

Dotty1970 · 09/03/2019 11:35

Namechange8471

lab not a pit bull

Find this a little offensive op!

why is this offensive? Ffs they're not exactly 'safe' dogs

Meandmetoo · 09/03/2019 11:46

Pits aren't a breed.

Other lady was utterly bonkers op and to be ignored!

fleshmarketclose · 09/03/2019 11:58

Owner was unreasonable. I have a rescue that can be a grumpy git depending on how she is feeling (at other times she can be friendly if she wants) The time to say anything is before another dog gets close so that they can be kept away (if crossing the road isn't an option)
Generally if people see yours is on a lead they put their's on a lead as well, when I warn them she is a grumpy git they keep theirs close as I do her and there isn't any problems.

Butterfly84 · 09/03/2019 11:59

It doesn't sound like you were unreasonable at all. However, did your dog get very close to hers? Some dogs are fear responsive and she may have been nervous that her dog would react badly. It's best to not let your dog get too close to someone else's unless you know that the dog wants it.

Wingedharpy · 09/03/2019 12:06

In my extensive dog walking experience I've found that most dogs are fine, even the grumpy ones, it's humans that are the problem.

TSSDNCOP · 09/03/2019 12:46

Was the JRT on a lead? If I’m out and I see someone with a dog on a lead I give them a deliberately wide berth as there is usually a reason.

If JRT was off-lead, that’s what I would’ve pointed out. If you don’t have your dog under control it’s super-U to expect everyone else to do your job.

Yabbers · 09/03/2019 12:53

When somebody acts in a way that seems way out of proportion, the problem is usually with perception.

Unless anyone was there watching, it’s impossible to see who was in the wrong. It’s been written as if OPs dog was doing absolutely nothing wrong. The other lady obviously didn’t perceive it that way. What the OP deems a a little sniff, might come across as something which looks more aggressive to someone else.

As an example, a dog moving towards DD will look to the owner as if her lovely kind gentle dog is being friendly. As far as DD is concerned she’s going to get bitten. Neither of them are wrong in how it looks to them but something upset the woman if her reaction was that severe. OPs dog may not have done anything wrong but calling the other woman the sorts of things which have been said here is uncalled for. OP might benefit from just taking a moment to think about how it might have looked from the other side and be a bit more understanding in the future.

BlueSlipperSocks · 09/03/2019 12:58

I'm a bit confused why you told the dog to "stay" as you passed them? "Stay" means "stay there and don't move until I tell you".

Anyway if you had your dog on a lead how could it have approached the other dog? Or was the other dog not on a lead and approached yours? In which case the other owner is stark raving bonkers!

Dog walking is, usually, a pleasant, social event. However, there are occasions when all dog owners will come across hysterical people (We find them everywhere, in all aspects of life). The dogs are fine, on the whole, as are the owners. However, here is always one... 🙄

TheDarkPassenger · 09/03/2019 13:02

She was a dick for being aggressive but fwiw if a dog is on a lead it’s etiquette to keep your dog away unless the owner says it’s fine (I keep mine on a lead sometimes but she’s still happy to socialise) some dogs are traumatised by attacks or just aggressive/frightened of other dogs and need leashing and keeping away from. Perhaps she just overreacted

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 09/03/2019 13:13

It's very social walking the dog isn't it? Apart from this woman, I met a couple of spaniels, a sheepdog and whippet. All lovely, and happy to sniff/be sniffed

It’s so lovely. Don’t let this one woman put you off.

You put the dog on a lead. That was perfect, she obviously had something else on her mind.

bowchicawowwow · 09/03/2019 13:14

I had an elderly lady snap at me when I was out walking my dog, on a lead, on the other side of the road. Her dog barked at mine. Mine did nothing. She shouted at me. Was a strange experience but like a pop said she might have been unwell. It did bother me for a while though.

k1233 · 09/03/2019 13:14

Some dogs are leash aggressive. The lady has probably experienced dog attack before and does not want dogs approaching hers. That's easily managed by dogs walking at heel to the left of the person and people passing on the right - puts two people between the dogs.

I'm not a fan of labs myself - 5 vicious ones locally tends to do that... Vicious as in lunging, snarling, drag their owners across the street to get you vicious.

Personally, having had my previous dog attacked by a wolf hound, and now having a Westie which pretty much equals dog bait, I discourage any dogs approaching. Polite people who ask if they can say hello, that's fine, but otherwise my dogs are close and tight at heel and we walk straight past.

Katterinaballerina · 09/03/2019 13:23

I’m really surprised at the number of aggressive labs you’ve met in one area. I’ve met two aggressive ones (the two of them were walked together and had the same owner) and hundreds and hundreds of labs. Are they from the same home or related?

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