To need a hand hold - everything piling up

[incognitoh]

If I deserve a flamIng, please give me one. Sometimes I feel like I can't get any perspective on things.
In short I constantly worry about my child. I never seem to be able to enjoy things because there's always something to do with her that's on my mind.
She has serious food allergies and has never eaten well. She's just got over a gastro bug and is now basically food refusing except by. I worry about her allergies and safety all the time. I worry about her limited diet.
She's 19 months now and she's not walking yet. I'm worried about that. And I worry about every little thing that happens to her. Eg this evening she was climbing on me and the chair in her room and slipped and banged her head on a bookshelf - she's fine in herself but has a small goose egg at the back of her head so I won't sleep a wink tonight worrying about that and checking on here(I'm putting her to bed now), even tho i know they are harmless and not a sign of serious injury.
I had cbt for PNA last year which helped but I'm not sure how much of this is just circumstantial - allergies and related necessary caution, plus DH and I have had a shit year with bereavement, work issues and three holidays cancelled or ruined due to daughter's illness (including our honeymoon) - or whether i am creating a prison in my mind with worry.
Is this just being a parent? I feel exhausted. We are planning a second and i can't think about the idea of another with all the same food and development issues....
Do I just need to get on with it and stop being so introspective?

You don't just need to "get on with it." Your anxiety is wreaking havoc on your life and you need support. Your daughter is fine and she will be fine in the future, it's just that your anxious thoughts are catastrophising everything to do with her well-being. I strongly suggest you get back into therapy and stop even thinking about having another child for quite a while. Throwing a new baby into the mix when you are already struggling and exhausted is a recipe for disaster.

Your anxiety about your daughter must be ruining things for you. Please go to your doctor. I had CBT for anxiety and it helped a great deal it didn’t cure it but made me understand it better. Don’t even think about adding any more stress to your life until you have sorted your anxiety issues first.