To think you can’t work from home with a 1 year old baby

[HipHopTheHippieToTheHipHipHop]

My company is recruiting for a sales exec and I overheard a call from a recruitment agent pushing a candidate currently on maternity leave somewhere else and about to go back to work but wants a new job.

She wants to work 3 days in the office and 2 days at home. For those 2 days she’d be looking after her 1 year old while she’s “working”.

AIBU to think this is taking the piss? There might be some jobs where you can juggle work and looking after a baby, but not while you’re dealing with clients (who work office hours). Hardly fair on the baby either.

@gokartdillydilly what a lot of anger you’ve got. An employee taking the piss is everyone’s problem, why should I turn a blind eye

My company won’t allow this, we have to show we have childcare set up before home working is agreed. I have a 4 year old and couldn’t work from home around him, let alone a baby. Very very occasionally, if he’s ill, DH and I will both wfh, an hour on and an hour off, keeping hold of our work phones too to send emails if necessary, but only if he’s so ill he’s subdued and will watch films all day on the sofa. No way could I do it if he was feeling well!

Hahaha obv she cant do it lol she wld get nothing done. Anyone who thinks otherwise doesn't have kids or understand how demanding they are.

I worked from home for a couple of hours this afternoon. I'm not doing it again unless there it's urgent.

I had to leave her with the tablet so she was quiet and I cld do some work. I had to take a couple long calls to discuss some work. It was stop start all afternoon to do nappies, get food, drinks etc. I gave up and took her to the park in the end and I'll need to log back on later to finish the hours I didn't do.

Another point is it isn't fair on the child. They need your full attention. Especially when they are at that stage they are in at everything!

@bruffin so during the day when your child was awake you weren't working. You were doing childcare plus working hours in the evening/overnight/during nap time.

@AlexaAmbidextra

My point was that the OP and many others here do not know the woman's full story and are making assumptions about someone they have absolutely no idea about!

TBH, the recruiter making the request may have even misworded the request and might not even be in full possession of the woman's childcare circumstances. As neither is the OP. Hence she is BVU

I worked from home with a one year old, as my husband was a SAHD responsible entirely for her.

Otherwise no of course it wouldn't work, how the hell could it?

DH worked from home for 18 months with our DS from when he was 10 weeks old as I had to go back to work. However, he was self employed and his job didn't involve talking to people. He found it really difficult

^Of course it's possible to work from home with a 1 year old.

But only if you have a nanny and a very separate area to work in where you will not be disturbed.^

I wrote our office WFH policy. It starts with “Working from home is not a substitute for childcare”.

I'll be WFH one day a week when I return from maternity leave -DD will be going to nursery as normal. I couldn't even do it now whilst she's not crawling/walking so never mind when she's 1!

@HipHopTheHippieToTheHipHipHop

I'm not remotely angry, but thanks for your concern ! I was just making a point about you not being in full possession of the facts, whilst making a judgment on someone's ability to do a job, based on an overheard conversation.

Maybe she is better off not getting the job afterall, if she's going to surrounded by people who think they know more about her home life than she does!

You do not know her set-up at home so you really need to not get involved.

I am self employed wfh and I got childcare for ds when he was 18 months old so I could work.

He's 5 now and in the holidays I can get up early and get a few hours done in the morning, then give him breakfast and do a couple more until he gets bored with his tablet.

Companies are not allowed any longer to ask you to prove that you have childcare in place as this is discrimination. If you make a request to WFH the subject of childcare should not come up, it is for the company to ensure that you produce the required word and if not there can be a conversation to find out why not.

Depends on the baby. With my first one - hahahaha, no. Not for years. With my second - possibly. Third - no.

I had to work (from home) for a couple of hours with my 4 year old around today (out necessity / workload, it’s not a regular thing). Just no!

I did it. DD was still on 2 or 3 solid 90 minute naps in a day. Not all working hours need to be done between 9 and 5. It’s entirely possible to do at least 7 hours of work in the 15 hours in a waking day.

How she chooses to do it is none of your business. YABU to decide that just because you couldn’t have done it, she can’t do it.

@Fiveredbricks

I think they probably accept it more in the states because their family related leave is woefully inadequate. 12 weeks maximum (unpaid) to cover maternity leave, illness etc - and that’s only for large companies. Small employers don’t have to give anything! It’s terrifying really.

Anyway OP YADNBU. You can’t possibly work with babies, toddlers, or younger children at home. Constant drink breaks, snack and food breaks, toileting, school runs etc and not to mention the constant MUUUUMMMMAAAAYYYYY? No.

I did manage to WFH successfully with tweens and teens - but only because I had my home office, they knew to be quiet because I was taking calls, they made their own lunches, and didn’t require my attention, apart from when I went to them on my scheduled breaks.

It’s madness.

It sounds near impossible - both require full attention, not sure how you can juggle that, and especially in the case of a young baby, who you would need to drop everything (sometimes in the middle of a conference call?!) to attend to them.

If you're going to work in the evenings then your employer needs to know and agree those as your working hours. If you're supposed to be doing 9 to 5 but spend that caring for a child then you're not doing what your employer has contracted you to do.

@gokartdillydilly I’m not concerned about your anger issues, that’s for you and your therapist.

Mothers trying to take the piss at work don’t help anyone. She wanted to be paid to work from home and would either let her child or her boss badly down.

Fortunately the director’s response to the recruitment person was “not a fucking chance”

There's absolutely no way my dd would let me work from home !

I do it regularly but only do a few hours, so I spread them over a longer period to account for the breaks. My job and boss have enabled me to make hugely positive changes to my life by doing this and it works well. I am lucky though that I can watch him and do my job at the same time. Plus - big nap!

No way.

Child needs to be in child care.

A 1 year old is pretty much the worst age of child to have at home while you work. A baby - sure, you can get stuff done between naps and with the baby in a sling. A 4+ year old child, you can get a fair bit done while they read / colour / play, according to how independent they are. They can also watch TV for a while if you have to make phone calls or need quiet.

1-3 year old? Nope. You get nothing done with that age of child. I would guess it's her first child and she has no idea what chaos the toddler years are about to unleash!

As a one off when ill or in child care emergencies, yes. 2 days a week no way.

Yeah I agree... as a one off or maybe one day during half term but 2 days a week no way!
In my job it is extremely flexible and I still think after a while this would get tiresome for my boss.