To hate personal toys at playgroups?

[MumofTinies]

Me and DS go to a toddler group once a week and it's pretty good with lots of clean toys and the occasional activity, enough to keep the kids occupied for a couple of hours you would think.

However the last few weeks a Mum has been allowing her DD to bring a bag full of her own toys with her. It's causing so many problems in the group because naturally other kids want to play with these items too, if she leaves them and goes off to play with something else and another child picks them up as soon as she notices she rushes back to snatch them away again. Mum used to intervene and tell her to share but it has become so frequent she's stopped bothering. I now try to steer DS away from her toys to avoid the drama but it is a pain as there are so many of her toys there.

Also I've noticed her behaviour has really taken a dip since this has been happening, she has become really possesive over all of the toys at the playgroup (not just hers) and the snatching really is getting out of hand as it is so frequent and she has now started shoving children who fight back. I'm sure she has become a bit confused because the lines have been blurred between shared group toys and her toys.

The most irritating thing is that there is usually something that gets lost so the Mum tries to rally the others around to look for it, most mums (myself included) just ignore her.

AIBU to think leave your own stuff at home? I think I will have a word with the group leader about it, I don't want to stop going as my DS has really enjoyed it and I have been going since DS1 was little.

YANBU! Nearly every one of my friends brings at least one toy to playdates, either at our house or in soft play. I HATE it! My son ALWAYS wants to play with the other child's toy, and it always causes ructions of some type. It's not too bad when they come to our house because the other child plays will be happy playing with my son's toys, but at soft play it's a nightmare.

There is nothing wrong with taking one or two favourite toys, but a bag full, no, if they get lost, it is the responsibility of the parent. Silly thing to do.

tell her- the group leader- to treat it as an insurance issue if another toy causes an accident, maybe wasn't age appropriate, the mum could be responsible, she's probably pissed of as much as you , but doesn't want to be always the negative one at least she can say she's had a complaint,

If it were one comfort toy I think it'd be ok but this not what u describe so YANBU

That sounds like a complete nuisance. I agree good idea to speak to leader.

The DM sounds like a total pain, I'd have told her where to go if she wanted me to look for her own toys.

I had the misfortune to be a playgroup leader for a few months - it wasn't a paid position. Having to police others toys or speak to people about things,would have made me jack it in just that bit sooner. Stop trying to keep your DC away from the toys, if her DD gets angry then say that it's not practical or fair on the other DCs to have two sets of toys.