AIBU to ask how others manage?

[knickerbockerglory33]

I have 2 children DD(5) and DD(1). My (normally amazing) childminder has just told me that she is changing to term time only. I have been back at work for 6 months since DD2 born and am just trying to work out how to manage with the school holidays! I had anticipated that the childminder would have both of them in holiday time.

I will have to find a new nursery for DD(1) but i don't know what to do about DD(5) unless i put her in nursery too (only short term solution as they only take them till they are 7 or so?)

I have established that there are 64 days of no school and yet I only get 25 days leave. DP is self-employed but stupidly busy over the summer so will not be able to do much. We are very rural and so not a great deal going on and anything that is is a big drive (normally in the opposite direction to work!). Any clubs seem to be 9-3.30 and my commute is 1.5hrs on a good day so no point going in for such a short time! We have no family nearby to help.

I know this is not a new problem, but it is to me as i was on mat leave last year and prior to that my eldest was in full time nursery. Returning to that nursery is not an option.

I don't expect anyone to solve my problem as its unique, i'm just wondering how other people manage in case it gives me any ideas! DP keeps suggesting an Au Pair but we don't have space (and i don't like the idea TBH)

TIA!

Does your school have a holiday club? If not, do any other local schools they are often open to all schools. Many private schools run holiday clubs open to all as well

Could your DH adjust hours for holiday club? Are there any other childminders? Do you have any help from parents?

Look for nurseries that do a holiday club - i.e. an 8-6 one same as nursery hours. Also - unpaid parental leave covers a couple of weeks of summer hols here. And swaps with other school mums.

Parental leave? I think it's 4 weeks per year per child.

Does the childminder currently have your 1 year old full time?

Is there a TA at your daughter’s school who might be interested in an after school job? If so, maybe your older daughter and younger one could go to the childminder before school, little one to childminder during the day, at TA picks up both girls and then TA picks up extra hours in school holidays? This is quite a popular choice where I live, maybe different if you are very rural though?

Unfortunately, au pairs are not back up nannies and there are restrictions on how much they can work/week.

thanks all, in answer to questions...

School does not have holiday club but a nearby one does but only till 3.30 and only for 2 weeks in summer - it will help but will be difficult to do 3.30 pick up due to being a distance away.

DP will do what he can but there are some jobs that do involve long days, its the nature of his work (building, farming, forestry) and not the best environment to take kids with him!

no other childminders and no family locally

will look into parental leave - didn't know about that - will go speak with HR shortly

Have e-mailed a 'nearby' (only 1/2hr drive :-)) nursery to see if they do holiday club. i hadn't thought of those but will have a look around for other nurseries too

TA is a great idea - i will ask around and see. They are a friendly bunch at school but i doubt anyone will want 2 more over the holidays!

DP thinks an Au Pair will answer all problems whilst also doing his errands and picking up stuff from the builders yard - i have tried to tell him otherwise!

I wouldn't want an Au Pair either! What about a nanny share with other people who use the childminder? My childminder had her hip replaced and it was real faff to deal with. I altered my hours temporarily and shared childcare with friends. I've also used parental leave in the past. Good luck! x

AP plus holiday club?
Working short days or adjusted hours + holiday club?

Parental leave is 18 weeks total per child over the course of their childhood (ie until they are 18), of which you can take up to 2 weeks per child per year.

It's unpaid, but employers are legally required to allow it. If the date you ask for doesn't suit, they can offer a different date, but there should be a good reason.

So with 2 children, you can get an extra 4 weeks off if you can afford that unpaid. Obviously, not a solution for their whole childhood (due to the 18 week total) but might help this year while you figure it out/get a different child minder.

And if your DH is super-busy in summer, does this mean he could cover most of Christmas?

Can you do off-set half-days at work, and have your eldest in the 9-3:30 holiday clubs? You may need to find one close to work rather than home.

Sharing days with another mum works well if you can find someone, but it can be tricky to coordinate days that work for both families.

Between all those things together, you can probably do it. Although if the kids get ill, that can wipe out another week. It's hard!

Oh, and parental leave can only be taken in 1 week blocks (ie rather than odd days), but you can take that for your main holidays, then use your AL for half days and weeks where you share care with.

Have you checked private schools?

Holiday club at a nursery near your work would seem to be the best option.

Can you work from home sometimes? That would mean you'd use the full holiday club hours without having to use some of it for commute.

I am a single mum to 2 DS(7) & (2)
ds1 goes to holiday club, ds2 is at nursery full time.
i try to book time off work for term time holidays and my ex books time of too, but we do not have enough holidays to cover the 13 weeks he is off school.

My DD's childminder covers school holidays. She gets 6 weeks paid holiday per year. I get 5 weeks but my DH and parents cover some of the days and it's just about manageable.

Change childminder if it doesn't work around you. A term time only childminder would certainly not work for me.

Local gymnastics, dance schools, sports centres etc offer holiday care where we are. They take from age 5. Some do wrap around hours so 8-6. Also try private schools they may have holiday care anyone can use. A lot is word of mouth or noticing adverts.
From age 7 they can go away to Pgl activity holidays.

Thank you everyone, this is really helpful to understand what others do. I like to have things mapped out in advance and i thought all was sorted until childminder changed her routine!

I have spoken to HR regards parental leave and they are going to send me some bumf to have a look through - as you say @nordicwannabe its only for 1 week blocks but will certainly help a bit and does not affect other benefits etc.

Nurserys (understandably) cannot guarantee holiday place for my youngest as preference is obviously given to those attending all year around. They do however do a holiday club (8-6) but that will only help with 1 child :-)

I do do a bit from home but i do need to be in the office regularly, i am just going to have to get really good at juggling. I'm sure once i get this first year dealt with it will be easier in the future!

will also look at holiday clubs near where i work but it ends up being very long days >12hrs out of the house for the little ones (pretty long for me TBH!) and a nightmare when caught in traffic!

thank you again everyone!

Yes but losing a week's pay for parental leave is much more expensive than paying for child care!

In my experience, CM tend to work in twos and threes, each will pick up each others childrens in times of crisis - as your CM if she has a friends who would be willing to do the holiday care .

Or holiday clubs.

Or pulling in parental favours, you take a week off, someone else takes a week off and you look aftereach others.

School & the LA may also be able to vive you a list of childminders.
The LA will be able to give you a list of authorised clubs
Churches often run clubs.

losing a week's pay for parental leave is much more expensive than paying for child care

It's also much more enjoyable! Of course it isn't financially possible for everyone, but certainly worth considering!