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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed at strangers touching my baby

36 replies

lboogy · 25/02/2019 20:25

It happens every so often that strangers want to touch or hold my baby and coo over her
-I was at the airport and the airport worker asked to hold my baby
-at a mums and baby group, the lady even asked to take a photo of my bubba!

  • I went to give blood and one of the blood draw people came up and started stroking dc's hand and cheek
  • on the bus even

I don't get it. I wouldn't dream of doing something like this. If you're someone who does touch strangers' babies, why do you do it? Doesn't it occurred to you that It's inappropriate?

OP posts:
SamStephens · 26/02/2019 02:53

I don’t mind people asking because I can say no politely. I loathe people who take it upon themselves to just do it regardless. They’re strangers, who knows what risks they pose!

I remember when my daughter was maybe 8 weeks old and mum and I went shopping, baby fell asleep in the pram (finally!!) so I put the hood down, Mum took her to the chemist while I went to the bathroom and Mum turns her back for two seconds to pay for her script and suddenly my daughter is wailing because an old lady took it upon herself to lift the pram hood and start touching my daughter - waking her in the process! My mum isn’t confrontational so was taken aback but didn’t say anything, I’m fairly certain if it had been me, I’d have lost my shit.

enidalton · 26/02/2019 03:00

Never worried about germs with my two, more they come into contact with when they're younger, the better they'll be able to fight them off in later life (within reason).

I always think the more interaction they got with people the better. My DD loved anyone and everyone. I could of left her with the homeless lady at the bus stop and she would of thought it was great! Till she needed feeding anyway! I think different interactions can rarely be a bad thing.

SchnitzelVonCrum · 26/02/2019 06:48

@WorraLiberty how do you judge if someone's ’clean’ before they do?!? What do you say if you judge them to be not?? Happiness yes, germs no. You can't see germs!!!!

SchnitzelVonCrum · 26/02/2019 06:52

Touching other strangers babies and children is NOT OK!! WTAF. OP this drives me bananas as well. Interacting is fine but you can interact without touching. I don’t like anyone but me/DH and close family touching my baby’s hands or face, how do you know where they've been!! And asking to take a photo is just odd.

Damntheman · 26/02/2019 11:09

Germs never worried me much, but touching without consent is a worrisome trend. I never touch without asking first and usually wouldn't ask unless the child and parent were known to me already.

That said, I would offer to help/hold baby/hold bags/distract toddler if a mother looks overwhelmed with too much stuff or too many children.

littlemeitslyn · 26/02/2019 12:17

YBU to say 'bubba'

flirtygirl · 26/02/2019 12:39

I would not be OK with random a touching my people, I often stop and admire cute babies and say Hi but there is no need to touch them.

I pull not be happy with the blood worker in particular or any hospital worker touching them. Too many germs and lots of these people are very lax, whenever I have an appointment I people watch and people in general are pretty gross with hygiene. Hence the spread of colds etc.

Those saying the op is being precious are being ridiculous. Why should the op expect to have her baby touched by all and sundry?

flirtygirl · 26/02/2019 12:40

And asking for a photo wtf ??

Thesearmsofmine · 26/02/2019 12:44

This kind of thing has never really bothered me. It’s good for babies to be interacting with others as long as they aren’t filthy.

I always chatter to babies, wave at them etc, I don’t touch though,

TwoRoundabouts · 26/02/2019 12:44

You are being precious.

KeptTheBeachesShipwreckFree · 26/02/2019 12:55

I used to love people cooing over my babies! So long as they weren't licking them or whatever I didn't mind them touching my babies either. They're 7&8 now and strangers probably just find them annoying and loud now (they're not, they're actually lovely but I'm biased) so this stage doesn't last long.

People have survived having their hands and faces touched or stroked or even being held as babies by strangers for thousands of years.

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