Kids birthday parties

[myusernameisnotmyusername]

My dd is 6 on Thursday. She invited all the kids in her class to her party. We've had 1 rsvp. She wrote a list of the kids to make sure she didn't miss one out. Luckily we have some other kids coming but I can't help but feel worried that there'll be hardly anyone from school. The teacher said she's friends with everyone and she has had invitations to other parties. I don't understand.

I would be inclined to do named party bags for the children who RSVP and no party bag for those who didnt. You don't want to end up with loads of party bag crap left over and costing you a fortune, or with 1 too few leaving one child out.

"Oh sorry, we didn't think you were coming as you didn't RSVP, so we didn't do a party bag for Jimmy". Parents might get the message

That's a really good idea actually!

I don't think the lack of RSVP is meant to be rude when it comes to DCs party. Over the years I use them more as a way to give my contact number. Unlike a wedding invite, you can have 20 birthday invites a year plus all the extra DC scheduled needs, along with work, life, other DC.
I am not a rude person I am thoughtful but I have ,forgot to RSVP to a childs party a few times.
As they get older OP the invitees usually let the Birthday child know if it is a yes or no. even if it is at the last minute

I am not a rude person I am thoughtful but I have ,forgot to RSVP to a childs party a few times.

But it is rude. With 4dcs I have more than 20 invites a year, and it IS a hassle, but I also know that for the child sending the invite, he or she only hosts one birthday party a year (or even every 2 years), and has chosen your child, and that their parent is spending time and money and worrying about their child's feelings.
So if you are the thoughtful person you'd like to be, you can spend the literally 2 minutes it takes to reply to the invites. In my experience, if you do it the same day it's much easier to remember, and you'll get massive brownie points from the other parents too.

OP, hopefully it all sorts out for you and your DD.

Emeraldshamrock you are wrong in my view about this. RSVPs do matter. Children need to know if their friends are coming to their birthday party. And parents do too. It is very thoughtless not to reply. If everyone thought like you it would be impossible to know if any children were going to turn up at all. I’m really surprised that you think this is ok.

I am not a rude person I am thoughtful but I have ,forgot to RSVP to a childs party a few times
Then you’re not as thoughtful as you think you are.
It doesn’t matter if the party has 10 guests or 100 it still needs catering for. It’s not just about the expense it’s about managing expectations. If you’ve invited 30 people but only 10 are coming you need to make sure your child knows in advance and youve bigged up those 10 so that it’s not disappointing when 30 children don’t appear.

I am not a rude person I am thoughtful but I have ,forgot to RSVP to a childs party a few times.

definitively rude, sorry and very unkind. It doesn't matter if you receive 5 invitations a week: you open the letter, check your calendar ,and reply yes or no immediately. How hard can it be?

If parents think you are coming, they won't be able to invite someone else instead, they are paying and you are taking a space.
If everybody does the same, the birthday kid ends up with no one there. Would you like this to happen to your own child?

If the entire class declines a birthday party organised for my child, I cancel it and organise something else! As long as you know, you manage.

There are enough last minute issues, sick bug or other.

It's actually really rude and arrogant to think that it's only a birthday party, not a wedding. Some parents have saved a lot of money to be able to have at least ONE party for their kids, and it's a really big deal for them.

There are no excuse for not RSVP when you have received the invitation, none at all. Just text no and you are done.

Gosh I find this so frustrating! My sons 8th birthday is coming up and predictably he would like a party but the fiasco we had last year with no RSVP’s and people just turning up with siblings on the day was so stressful.

This year I’m going to steer him towards a bowling alley party with just a few friends and take him out on his actual birthday.

I am not a rude person I am thoughtful but I have ,forgot to RSVP to a childs party a few times
I suppose you're right, I'll do it in future. though we always attend and the DC usually tell the friend they're going.
If I wasn't able to make it, I do RSVP.

So I thought I'd update. Had a really good party. In the end the venue people never turned up to let us in so we ended up going home and having it there! There were about 12 kids in the end so it made a really nice group. My dd said it was the best day of her life! Thanks again to everyone who took the time to respond before when I was stressing out!

A great update. I am glad it went well in the end.

Glad it went well op, although I'd be pretty cheesed off about the venue letting you down. What did you do about the party bags in the end?

The venue people let you down? I’d be fuming! Glad you had a lovely party though.

Oh wow that’s bad (but you and your DD really made the best of it so well done). What kind of venue was it?

God, I'm so glad those days are behind me! You have my utmost sympathy - people are so rude! I particularly hate the ones who 'dump & run' and those that bring siblings & just expect them to be included!! Still makes me cross now, just thinking about it!!

It was a church hall that let us down. My DP is going to contact them to get our deposit back. For party bags I'd just bought 16 of stuff so 16 bubbles, 16 plastic toys etc so there was something for everyone (love Wilko ). My friend put them together for me. Most people did dump and run,seems to be normal now but my friends did stay. I didn't mind though as it would have been really squashed with all the adults in the house too. I think my dd just loved having her friends in her house making a mess of her bedroom.

Oh and luckily the weather wasn't too bad as we had the bouncy castle in the garden. It was so embarrassing though standing outside the venue with the bouncy castle man!

People who can't even RSVP to a party invite by sending a quick text... What would they have done back in the 80s when you had a tear-off slip to return?! 😂