AIBU To want just a little bit of sympathy/understanding?

[Andromeida59]

Hi. I was in a car accident last year of which I'm still recovering. Due to the brain, head, neck and back damage etc. I have asked to reduce my days at work as I physically can't cope. I've told my GM (I don't have parents) this and she's just really disapproving.

I'm not doing this because I want to, I have to. I still have more than enough to pay bills etc. I'm now classed as disabled and I'm already having a tough time at work because they've been discriminating me.

I'm not asking for pity or for her to do things for me. It's just that she's always held me to a far higher standard than everyone else. I recently told her about how I was really happy with an essay mark. She didn't acknowledge it and just changed the subject to talk about another relative.

I just wish she could at least try and appreciate how hard things are for me. AIBU?

She obviously isn't a very empathetic person. Some people are like that. Couldn't you just say to her that you'd really really appreciate a bit of understanding and approval sometimes. Maybe she doesn't realise how she makes you feel?

People like that don’t change. They enjoy pissing on people’s chips and aren’t supportive. People will spend years trying to get people like that to understand and it never, ever happens.

I would say avoid personal things with her if possible and develop effective support networks elsewhere. Have you got other friends or relatives who are more supportive?

It’s her loss really, she’s missing out on what could be a nice mutually supportive relationship.

Sorry to hear you’re struggling, sounds like you’ve been through a lot. Has your GM always been like this? Certainly sounds like odd behaviour towards a member of your family that’s having a tough time!

She does sound very negative towards you. Have you got anyone else in your life you can get support from? I totally understand its nice to get some sympathy when things are difficult or a pat on the back when things go well. It sounds like for whatever reason though she won't be the person to give you this support.

Thank you all. I am very lucky and have a very supportive partner and friends etc.

I have tried to be honest and say that I've been ill and not having a good time. When I've done this I'm accused of being negative.

She's obviously never going to change. It's just a shame.