First posting and more of a wwyd. Married for nearly 30 yrs, dh self-employed for last 20. I did office work for him and worked nights, kept house and raised 2 dc both in their 20's now.
Dh is v hard working too much so. Over the years all holidays, outings, parties, Christmas, birthdays etc were left to me. Outside of work dh shows no interest in daily life, will take part but not initiate planning.
For last 10 years dh has suggested going away in Feb/Mar or Sept/Oct but has never followed through. Something always comes up, he can't get away or takes on more work or forgot. This has lead to many arguments, upsets and me being generally pissed off.
Dh' s attention to detail at work is second to none, however at home it is awful. He doesn't listen to me and forgets important details, occasions and tasks to be done.
I have to constantly remind him to do things he has said he'll do, I could ask him 10/15 times to do something in the end I just loose it and start nagging which I hate. I have told him that I hate the way he makes me feel, a moany nagging wife.
He will ask me about something I spent the previous evening talking to him about, with no real recollection of it. This is a very common occurrence. As a result I feel disrespected and insignificant.
The final straw is I had time off this week told dh early in Jan, he promised to take time off, realised last Friday 15th that he couldn't take time off, never told me. I planned a trip but luckily held back on actually booking it. When I asked him why he didn't let me know so I could arrange alternative plan dh said it never ooccured to him.
I have gone to the wall and back with tos man but have had enough of his self absorbed selfishness. I put up with his drinking issues and drunken abuse. ( Still drinks, but moderate). But have now told him I will never go anywhere and I mean anywhere with him again. He has hurt me too much already. So AIBU?