Bullying

[sugarplumfairy28]

I'll try not to drip feed. A family lives a few doors down our road, 3 boys. The eldest lets call him Adam is one year older than my son, the next lets call him Mason is my son's age, and the youngest 2 years younger lets call him Lenny and same age as my daughter.

My son went to Nursery with Mason, and they are in the same class at school, they've basically been together for 5 years, up until July last year Adam was also at school with both of them. Lenny and my daughter get on just fine without issue.

Mason is a stirrer and a wind up, name caller and general antagonist. He is constantly winding up my son, picking fights. Whenever my son had finally had it and says something back to Mason, Adam appears out of nowhere and beats the living hell out of him, just for something said that 'upset' his brother. We tried again and again to talk to school who said they are very aware of the problem and we're not the only ones complaining but! they keep speaking to the parents who have no issue with the eldest son 'protecting' his younger brothers, and with an attitude like that there is little they can do. Last July Adam went up to senior school and thought the problem would just go away.

My son has put up with a lot and over a fair amount of time and has recently taken to fighting back when Mason hits him etc. His just had enough of laying down and taking it, the school have the same answer as before, the parents have no issue with whatever Mason is doing and worse still, say my son is just as bad for fighting back. My son and Mason had another run in this week, and today while my son was playing outside Adam found him and beat the hell out of him as punishment.

So hear is my AIBU, the parents won't listen and these boys are vicious, my plan is to teach my son basic self-defence, which in essence is block, counter attack (to disable) and run. I think the key here is the counter attack to teach him techniques that do hurt, and might make make these boys think twice. I am in a position to teach him this, but part of me is wary about the aim being to inflict pain on other kids. But I really don't know what else to do, so would be open to any other ideas.

Surely report adam to the police for beating up your son????

If you're in the uk I'm pretty sure the age of criminal responsibilty is 10 so surely the police can do something if you spoke to them

I’d teach self defense, only to be used in self defense against physical attacks.

When are they seeing each other unsupervised? If Adam isn’t at the primary any more then the answer is surely not to let your son go near them. Ask for them to be seated separately at school and break the cycle.

A child in senior school is assaulting your primary aged child? Police if it were me.

I’d also be coming down harder on school who are not protecting your son.

Police. What else?

We live in a small village in Germany. Most incidents with Mason occur at school during break time. Mason is snide and does these things out of view of the teacher on the playground, and if my son tells on him Mason denies everything. Despite this whenever we speak to the school they acknowledge the problem, but push it back on the parents who have no issue. They will take away playtime from Mason if they see him doing something but this rarely happens.

With Adam, its when my son is playing outside, outside of school. My Son likes to ride his bike, play at the stables opposite our house with his friends, or play on the open green with other friends. He has said if he sees Adam he'll play somewhere else, but yesterday Adam ran at him and got him as he was walking away completely unprovoked. We have an all out ban on other children in our garden after an incident last year, but its not fair to confine our son to the garden.

Ahh sugar, the age of criminal responsibility in germany is 14, do they have anything like pscos?