Lighthearted. To think your mother in law isn't your mother!

[Seline]

DH states that the term MIL means that she is your mother in the eyes of the law. I told him it's not meant to be that literal. He insists that it is.

He's being obtuse isn't he. He refuses to believe me

My mil comes from a tradition where women call their mils “mum”. She understands why I choose not to call her mum, but it means that she has to jump through such complex hoops with every card she sends to make sure i don’t think she values me less than her other dils who do call her mum. And obviously dp calles her mum.She is not very adept with writing and her cards always have her name and “mum” in brackets and all sorts of other complications. I do wish I had agreed to call her mum 30 years ago when she asked me if I wanted to. Particularly as we’re not married and she is very traditional so it was a very generous thing to do. Ah well, I was young and foolish and it’s too late now.

So can you marry your FIL? By actual law yes (as long as you aren't still married obviously) but not by Canon law.

Legally you can marry your step father providing you are over 21 and you didn't live with him while you were under 18 (so stepfather your mum met when you were 19 is fine, one who raised you since you were 2 no) not sure where canon law stands on that one.