AIBU for trying to potty train my 17month old ?

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re posting in AIBU for traffic - please be gentle

Ok so after weeks and weeks of tantrums over nappies being changed, I've bit the bullet and attempting to potty train.

However my LG is 17 months. Am I crazy for even contemplating it at this age ? We've tried all the usual things, but nothing works. I'm constantly wrestling with her

2 days in we've had 3 poos in potty, a poo and pee and 2 pee's. This has been when I've been watching her like a hawk and sat her in the potty myself. About 6 pee's on the floor.

Tonight I saw she went to sit on the potty her self but her pull up nappy was on. I helped her with this but she didn't do anything when sat in the potty but its been the first she's initiated it her self.

Do I keep going ? What's everyone else's experience ? Anyone else started potty training at this age ? Any advice would be appreciated.

You can start but given that she has no bladder control and can’t seem to pee on demand you could be doing this for months.
In my opinion potty training involves three things:

• ability to pee on demand
• ability to hold one’s wee aka bladder control
• ability to sense when one needs to go.

If the first two criteria are met then one can potty train.

You can do EC but it’s a LOOOONG process and there will be accidents esp with a non verbal child. You might prefer it to the daily tantrums.
Or second, you introduce the idea. We are doing this with DS2 who just turned 2. At every nappy change he goes and wees happily for us. So he can wee on demand. At some point when it’s a bit warmer over a weekend I will put pants on him and test his bladder control.
From that point on I will take him to the toilet every 90 mins or so and before going somewhere and after reaching somewhere.
And then over the next 6 weeks I will stop promoting and hope that he gets to the third bit (sensing when to wee).

The third way is to introduce the potty, get them to use it occasionally and then wait. We did that with DS1. He got to 2.5 and said, I say bye bye nappies. And he was fully dry day and night in 48 hours.

All three methods work but it’s about how much you want to be stuck indoors and how much patience you have.

It's worth a try. It's such a huge plus for kids if they can get potty trained early. It must be a million times more comfortable for one.
I tried to potty train my kids young but didn't manage it until they were between two and two and a half. So not that early.

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Well she's fighting it today :( any time shes been sat on the potty shes cried :(

Not sure if there is also teething going on, but her patience in zero. I've popped a pull up.nappy on and think ill see if she goes to it at all her self.

Should.i try again tomorrow ? Or how's it a few more months ?.

Ok now I'm confussed. I think I should keep going ?

Yesterday after being so grumpy and chewing on everything, i gave her Nurofen. In afternoon she was a lot more settled. Managed a pee and poo in potty. A few times after that i say her on potty, to find nothing in it but there was urine on her legs so not sure if shes done this when her pull up pants have come down.

Today, my OH said as soon as she went in living room, she went straight to potty to sit down. Still had her gro romper on. And everything but that's leaked out. Definatley wasnt wet before she went through.

I know it's very early days and this could go on for months if i continue, but i think there's good signs she night be starting to 'get it'

What do you guys think?

Sounds like a lot of stress for nothing really. I would leave it and wait a few more months. Both my DS went through phases where nappy changing was a battle, it didn't last. Eldest was trained within 48hrs at 26mo and youngest took a week when he was 2y8m. They are all different. (Youngest hated nappy changes but even now at 5yo will hold off going to the toilet until the last possible moment!)

As a general rule, bladder control usually starts to develop between 2 and 3 years of age.

At 17mths it's unlikely that your DD has that level of control yet. Often when parents say that their child was trained at that age, what they really mean was that the parent was trained to recognise the signs that their child needed to use the potty/toilet and put them there.

www.nhsggc.org.uk/kids/resources/ot-activityinformation-sheets/readiness-for-toileting-information-sheet/ is a useful guide to when a child might be ready.

My DD1 first showed an interest when she was about 18mths old and said that she wanted to use the toilet "like big girls do". Physically she wasn't ready though. I left it for another 8 or months and she got the hang of it very quickly.