AIBU, I'm a single parent who wants to date just for fun!

[gototown09]

I've been a single parent to a toddler for over a year. I have my life together, good job, good friends and buying my own place. I'm in my late 20s.

I'd like to date, but I don't want anything serious, I just want to have some fun, to feel desirable and not just be 'mummy'. My child is my priority and I love the life we have together so I'm not looking for someone to add to the family.

AIBU? I feel really guilty about this desire. Especially because I have a toddler and have only been single for a year.

Thoughts please!

Go for it!

Keep child and adult life separate obviously but as long as you don’t lead anyone on and your child is not impacted why not?

God no YANBU! You're still you. If you didn't have a child, you'd be dating and nobody would think twice about it. Not as though you're going to be bringing them all home and introducing them.

I'm a bit like that but found OLD a bit tricky as people want to pin down "what are you looking for" immediately. Also found it hard to find time for dates tbh!

You are a mum first, but you’re still a woman who wants fun/Affection! It’s perfectly fine to have those wants

I feel really guilty about this desire

Why? It’s perfectly natural.

I’ve been single for 5 years, had a FWB for about 4.5 of those.

No desire for a partner, no desire to introduce anyone to my DD or create another family.

Works for me.

Thanks! I don't know why I feel so guilty about this. Probably because I just want to have some fun!

What is OLD?

I'm trying Bumble. I have never dated so it's super weird.

Totally unsure what type of person to look for, I'm sure I'll figure it out thought

OLD = Online Dating

Do you have shared contact with your child's father?

I've been a single mum since my son was 8 months, he is now 3. Couldn't think of anything worse than being sat with a stranger when I'm tired from work and having to pay and arrange for childcare. I live vicariously through my work colleagues dating stories

Teachersofpeaches
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I totally get that. Tbh I am sort of the same. I just wanted to dip my toe in. I want to draw a line between my ex and my life now.

My toddlers dad isn't around much. When he does visit he generally stays with me. My toddler isn't ready to go away on his own with him due to how often they see each other.

I'm a single mum and I have a FWB. Works for me, I don't want a serious relationship.

I met a lovely FWB through OLD. A lovely bit of company for the weekends when DC are with their Dad. I don't want another relationship but just a bit of fun and me time. Don't feel l guilty.

It would probably be a lot more different if I had every other weekend free. Imagine paying £30for a babysitter + whatever else and the date was crap

You are soooo not unreasonable! As long as you're on the same page with whoever it is, it could be great for both of ypu. Just put at the top of your profile wprds to the effect of 'I'm a single parent, so my child is my first priority and I'm not looking to change my family set up. Also not just after a shag (unless you are, in which case that is also cool). So if you fancy insert things you like doing and would like to do with someone cool then I'd love to hear from you.

Honestly, the 'what are you looking for' question is a blessing - weeds out the ones you don't want nice and easily.

Good luck and have a great time!

*Whyyounoteatmypie
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I love that line 'not change my family set up' will definitely use that.

*TeachersofPeaches
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I am sometimes jealous of that set up, but I'm glad I get to spend loads of time with my son. My parents are great and have him 1 nights a week.

Tbh your more likely to find men just looking for abit of fun anyway so it wont be a struggle. Casual relationships arent for me which is why im staying single but if its what you want.. Go for it.