Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Things that annoy me when parents come to stay

31 replies

3in4years · 16/02/2019 09:48

Whether it is mine or dh's:

  • they don't shower
  • they don't take their shoes off
  • they dot their belongings all over the house
  • they eat in the lounge
  • they read instead of actively watching the kids
And lots more. IABU but needed to let someone know.
OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 16/02/2019 09:49

Actively watch their own kids? Or yours?

PurpleDaisies · 16/02/2019 09:50

I am eating in the lounge right now.

Kintan · 16/02/2019 09:57
  1. Maybe they don’t like your shower.
  2. Have you asked them to?
  3. Oh dear they feel at home enough to do this! What a nightmare!
  4. Did you never eat in the lounge at their house growing up? And also have you asked them not to if this bothers you?
  5. I don’t understand this point, are they only allowed to come over if they are babysitting?
If those are the most annoying points you can pick out from both sets of parents then you are very lucky :)
DeepDarkWoods · 16/02/2019 09:58

You are very lucky.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 16/02/2019 09:59

Well apart from the not showering l do all of the above. And why is it their job to watch your children?

All our family belongings are littered everywhere. Why shouldn’t theirs be?

ThreeAnkleBiters · 16/02/2019 10:00

I would take my shoes off in someone's home if I noticed everyone else doing so but surely you could just ask them to remove their shoes?

Most houses you can eat in the lounge if you don't want them to you have to say so.

Whose kids are they supposed to be watching? Their own or yours? Obviously if the latter YABU.

The belongings around the house surely isn't that big a deal unless they're there for months.

user1457178042 · 16/02/2019 10:08

I've been reading instead of "actively watching my kid/s" for about 7 years and they've both managed to survive thus far.

Original poster
3in4years · 16/02/2019 10:11

I agree. None of it is a big deal. They are both very nice. I ask everyone to take shoes off and not eat in the lounge. We were never allowed to have shoes on or eat in the lounge growing up and I don't do this in their houses, so it feels a little disrespectful, but no big deal.
The kids are mine and little (5, 3 and 1). I only ask them to watch the kids while I shower for example, but when I come back down they are reading.
I am lucky, yes.

OP posts:
DoingMyBest2010 · 16/02/2019 10:13

PIL's: leave teacups everywhere, constantly on phone/tablet/watch soaps/leave teabags on the side/moan about quality of coffee/random bits of food left in fridge. I could go on

Original poster
3in4years · 16/02/2019 10:15

Oh thank you, DoingMyBest, that was more the type of response I was hoping for!

OP posts:
Mishappening · 16/02/2019 10:18

This is a bit of a non-problem I feel.

No-one takes their shoes off here, unless they are very muddy for some reason, and we always eat in the lounge. You do not have to shower to keep clean; and it is possible to watch over children whilst doing something else at the same time.

I think you should take steps to raise your annoyance threshold or life in general is going to be a bit of a trial for you!

foxandthehound · 16/02/2019 10:19

Do you actively watch your own kids 24/7? If they're playing nicely in the lounge, do you not pick up a good book yourself?

Original poster
3in4years · 16/02/2019 10:20

I think life in general is a trial for me!
Not really. I am just a clean and tidy person and find it hard to tolerate mess. But only mildly hard.

OP posts:
Vulpine · 16/02/2019 10:21

So they smell? If not i think you should just chill out a bit.

Original poster
3in4years · 16/02/2019 10:21

No I don't pick up a book when I am in some charge of a 5, 3 and 1 year old... unless the little one is asleep.

OP posts:
PotteringAlong · 16/02/2019 10:22

Can’t you watch the children and read at the same time?!

PurpleDaisies · 16/02/2019 10:22

I think that’s quite unusual. Children playing nicely don’t need to be actively watched.

PotteringAlong · 16/02/2019 10:22

Cross post. Well, mine are 7, 4 and 2 and I read when I’m in sole charge of them!

ThreeAnkleBiters · 16/02/2019 10:23

I do actually get what you mean OP! I don't think my in laws or parents are particularly unreasonable but having someone in your house invading your space can be irritating in general.

Mil spends her entire time hoovering (the house has been hoovered) and commenting that "thank god we have a cleaner now, I just couldn't bare it before".

Original poster
3in4years · 16/02/2019 10:25

My nearly 1 year old is a cruiser/ climber/ adventurer. It wouldn't be safe to to take my eyes off her for long!

OP posts:
Dillyson · 16/02/2019 10:32
  1. Bring their own weetabix, mine aren't good enough.
  2. Bring their own towels, see above.
  3. MIL wanders around my house in a t shirt and her pants. No bra.
  4. MIL follows me, constantly.
Original poster
3in4years · 16/02/2019 10:36

Oh dear Dilly. My in-laws also bring all their own food and bedding/ towels. They say it's to save us trouble which is thoughtful, but I do wonder if ours just aren't good enough either?

OP posts:
Aridane · 16/02/2019 10:36

Gosh - none of that bothers me and is exactly what my mother does (last one apart)

IOnWednesdaysWeWearPinkI · 16/02/2019 10:43

My in laws are the same
.Don't take shoes off when entering- had to put a sign on my front door. They walk in any way and sometimes take their shoes off near my lounge 🙄
. Leave tea bags and their spoons on th side of the sink and after they finish they don't rinse their cup.
.when they eat bread or something crumbly they leave the crumbs on the table
.picks my 1 year old by her arms (have to keep reminding them not to do this, patience is wearing thin)
. Keeps trying to feed her junk food-they are overweight and have an unhealthy lifestyle and think it's funny to give her crap food
.give unsolicited advice

Ahh felt good to get that off my chest.
My parents are fine coz they never come over 🤣

ILoveAnOwl · 16/02/2019 10:52

My in laws have an aversion to the dishwasher. They actual take things out and wash them by hand. Which then means I feel obliged to dry up and feel very resentful because that's what the dishwasher is for. Also, their eyesight is going so you end up doing most of it again. Otherwise they are awesome people and I do realise how lucky I am that that is my biggest issue with them!

Swipe left for the next trending thread