Ok, hear me out.
My family and I live overseas, originally from the UK. We aren't wealthy but live in a very expensive part of the world, huge mortgage, high cost of living so there is never much spare cash.
My parents still live in the UK. My mother is sick and will probably only be with us for a few more years. She doesn't recognize me or the kids due to her illness which is progressing rapidly.
Anyway, my dad offered to pay for tickets back to the UK which we took him up on. The tickets are all booked and cannot be canceled. The original plan was to stay with my family for 4 weeks. DH and I have been talking about this and we've realized we've made a huge mistake and staying there is not going to be an option. Heres why:
my parents have never been able to keep a clean and tidy house and I think it is even worse now my mother's illness is taking a hold. They both drink heavily something which DH and I have given up recently. The last few times we have been at the house every morning we were waking up moving drink bottles and cans from the night before and cleaning up the kitchen for them. They live in a small house in a decent suburb but only one bathroom. We are two adults and two small children. The kids, like all kids, have a lot of energy and are noisy. My mother doesn't do too good with them. Like I said she doesn't recognize them and she does not appreciate the noise they make. They are 2 and 4 years old. We've started looking at airbnbs and hotels in the area just to give us a bit of space. I'm aware of what my father and siblings are going to think of this after my dad's paying for the flights already. Are we being unreasonable telling them that we don't want to stay with them, but would prefer a hotel/ air b&b. my father is disillusioned thinking that everything will turn out for the best but I know exactly how it will end. the rooms won't have been cleaned for months that will be bugs, spiders,mold in the bathroom and possibly in the bedrooms as well. I am feeling ashamed writing all this down. The house depresses me to no end. Are we being ungrateful here?