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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to now feel awkward?

10 replies

Busymumofgirls · 13/02/2019 18:15

I work in a nursery and asked my manager a few weeks ago if i could bring my child to work for the day (stating id happily pay the fee's) but was told it wouldn't work because my child had never been to that nursery before and other valid reasons which i kind of guessed it would be a no but was desperate and thought if you don't ask you don't get. I was fine with that answer as knew anyway she (manager) would more than likely say no. Fast forward a few weeks and circumstances have changed and life would be easier if my daughter could go to the nursery i work at, (other employees have their children their but obviously in a different room to the one their based in) my daughter would be in babies and i work in pre-school. Ive asked manager if there is any space for my daughter on the days i work and she has read the message but not replied. I feel so awkward now. If theres no space then thats fine but now i just feel stupid for asking because ive not long asked and she said no so now im stressing thinking oh god, ive annoyed her asking again. Im stressing now that its going to be awkward when i next see her. Im obviously going to ask if she got my message but wish she would of replied now instead of keeping me waiting. Just needed to get it off my chest. Think i need a glass of wine to stop me over thinking... 

OP posts:
Bombardier25966 · 13/02/2019 18:20

How many days ago did you send the message?

User298895613 · 13/02/2019 18:24

Don't worry! Just relax! She's probably just been to busy to reply! :)

Cheerbear23 · 13/02/2019 18:24

If the other people there have their kids in the nursery surely there’s no issue? Maybe the owner is just busy or needs to check numbers first?

SamBaileys · 13/02/2019 18:25

I work in a nursery too. A few of my colleagues have their children in the nursery, one is working in the same room as her daughter.
I don't think there would be a problem, if others do this why would there be? Maybe she's checking the numbers? I guess you could have asked her face to face then you could have gauged her reaction, I've text people loads of times and anxiously waited for a reply, If I can I just ask now!

minionsrule · 13/02/2019 18:25

I could understand her refusing a random day as your dd would be unsettled but permanent is a diff situation. Any chance ahe just hasn't checked if she has spaces yet on the days you want so hasn't replied?
Or maybe she wants to talk it through with the logistics rather than a flat yes/no

Seniorschoolmum · 13/02/2019 18:29

Maybe she has offered an available place to a potential customer and is waiting to see whether they accept before saying yes or no.
I’m sure it’s just something practical.

Busymumofgirls · 13/02/2019 18:35

I messaged this morning around 9.30am. I tried to catch her at work yesterday but when i did briefly see her it wasn't really an ideal time to ask. I did say in the message that i wanted to ask yesterday but didn't get the chance. I cant see why she would say no thats why i feel so awkward about her not replying. It feels like she's totally blanked me because ive annoyed her asking. I understood her saying no the first time as it was short notice and a one off bug this time the circumstances are different. Would it be even more awkward to message or just wait until next week and ask in person? I ideally wanted dd to have settles so she could of started sooner rather than later.

OP posts:
Busymumofgirls · 13/02/2019 19:20

And now's she's posting on our work group chat which makes me feel even more paranoid that I've annoyed her by asking and she's intentionally ignored me because the answer is no. I cant see any issue with my dd joining the nursery. Wish i would of just asked her face to face to avoid all this second guessing and waiting around.

OP posts:
chuttypicks · 13/02/2019 19:42

Maybe she forgot to check availability today and will let you know tomorrow. Don't chase her up. Ask next week if she doesn't come back to you before then.

NorthernBirdAtHeart · 13/02/2019 19:47

Give her a chance you only asked this morning! Asking for a one off is completely different to asking if there is a permanent place.

I’d give it a few days before chasing her up - and don’t stress about it in the meantime!

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