Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

to think this is not sinister? (Christians esp)

44 replies

Trimthatwicklow · 13/02/2019 15:42

My children’s school is in the middle of a housing estate and some of the homeowners are a bit funny about the parking. I am always very careful where I park and one day a lady came out of her house to check I wasn’t over hanging her drive (I wasn’t) and we were chatting. I explained the reasons why I drove and why we had changed schools and got talking about the church she goes to. I’m not particularly religious but I do identify as a Catholic and she was telling me about her Baptist tradition. All fine.

We have nodded to each other since, and then she came out again to say she was sorry if I had felt like I had been grilled by her and that she was aware that she had asked me lots of questions and hoped I wasn’t upset! I said it was fine, and I was glad to chat and she mustn’t worry. Off she went.

Then the other day I came out of school after drop off to find a big piece of paper on the windscreen saying

“can you give me a lift to the station please? Rachel, number 41.”

So I thought she must be really desperate so I knocked and she thanked me and grabbed her coat and hopped into my car! So I drove her to the station and she said that she was praying hard for a sign of guidance from God and that she was on her way into work (academic research) and didn’t know what to do so just prayed. And that she wasn’t well enough to walk to the station and saw the car and thought she would ask!

I was quite tickled and was chatting about a book I’m reading where the author, a scientist, firmly believes in fate and always being where you’re meant to be, and therefore I was meant to give her a lift that day. She was rather moved and tearfully thanked me. Then she jumped out at the station and headed off to the university!

She does not know my name. I only know hers because she wrote it on the paper. I was telling my husband and he saw things completely differently and said I should be careful and she sounds like a chancer. I think it’s unlikely that an elderly academic who seems a bit dotty, is in any way sinister!

Mumsnet jury, what do you think?

OP posts:

Drum2018 · 13/02/2019 15:45

Put it this way, I'd be parking elsewhere and not passing my number on. Otherwise you'll find yourself being asked to do a lot more.

Neptunesgiraffe · 13/02/2019 15:46

She sounds OK to me. My one worry would be that it becomes a regular thing. I'm crap at saying no and have been taken advantage of in the past, with regards to favours. Did you have to drive far out of your way?

ScarlettDarling · 13/02/2019 15:46

Nah, not sinister. Don't know that I'd fancy giving her lifts on a regular basis so make sure you're prepared to say no if she starts making it a regular thing. Unless you're happy to do it of course!

gokartdillydilly · 13/02/2019 15:49

She sounds kind of sweet! Some people are lonely, some are piss-takers, some are just friendly. And you sound very nice too OP. Good on you for being a pal

RiverTam · 13/02/2019 15:52

no, not sinister in the least. Slightly bonkers, perhaps, but then I'm not a pray-er, or an over-sharer.

evaperonspoodle · 13/02/2019 16:00

Not sinister or sweet, I suspect you will be the answer to many of Rachel's prayers from now on.

Parthenope · 13/02/2019 16:02

It looks like a classic example of Christian doublethink to me -- 'Oh, God answered my prayers!' when in fact her own quick thinking/ mildly brass-necked readiness to ask a total stranger to do her a favour was what solved the issue, not divine intervention.

anniehm · 13/02/2019 16:05

I think it's quite sweet, I suspect she is quite religious, but the real reason was she did need help and you were kind to her, perhaps she has no family and is very lonely (many of our congregation seem to gravitate to religion on the back of loneliness). Obviously one should always be cautious about any chance encounter but I would always be willing in similar circumstances to help because I want to think someone would help my parents in similar circumstances (they live 200 miles away),

ItsAllGone19 · 13/02/2019 16:05

I wouldn't say it's sinister but I would swerve parking near her again just in case she decides that God has placed you in her path to be her servant...

CakeBiscuit · 13/02/2019 16:05

I think she sounds like a lovely woman, as do you OP.

Nothing sinister about this to me.

deadliftgirl · 13/02/2019 16:10

I personally would not offer a lift to a stranger but she seems nice enough, probably lonely and I think its a good thing that she told you what she is praying for.

I am a christian and I like to talk about God to other christians as I am often scared someone will get offended by my faith. I know I should not worry about this but I can't help it. For her to tell what she is praying for, it shows she trusts you and can open up to you. She probably thinks your a christian also.

Are you though as you said you identify as a catholic and catholics are christians?

YogaWannabe · 13/02/2019 16:10

Ah, I’m a pretty cynical atheist but I think it all sounds kind of sweet!

LemonadeAndSchnapps · 13/02/2019 16:16

I don't think it sounds sinister. Sounds like a nice friendship brewing

Racecardriver · 13/02/2019 16:19

I wouldn’t say it’s sinister. Obviously do be careful not to become her personal taxi service but it’s not like she’s going to try to kidnap you or something.

macblank · 13/02/2019 16:21

My own thoughts, as a very relaxed Christian. I used to teach/preach the Bible, as well as be a regular member for many many years, but personal reasons, I stopped.... Just to set my background as it were.

...
I think it's nice, that in the world of religious hatred even denominational amongst "christians". To see an RC n Baptist get along is great, and the "Christian thing to do".

I too go for fate (predestined) rather than haphazard way of life. I dont think she is creepy or anything. She isn't asking to come for dinner or your phone number.

Carry on as you are,.it's nice. In this world full of anger n hate, it's nice to see 2 strangers get along, and casually enjoy each others.company for a short period, whenever.

However, if it becomes weekly asking for lifts, or borrow money, then I say... Carry on and be happy 😁

coppercolouredtop · 13/02/2019 16:21

thats really sweet and you sound lovely to have given her the lift. she sounds a bit eccentric at most.

id be quite pleased with my good deed if i were you op!

SpamChaudFroid · 13/02/2019 16:22

Not sinister, but potentially annoying, unless you don't mind being the answer to her "prayers" every time she needs a lift.

ReanimatedSGB · 13/02/2019 16:30

I'd be avoiding from now on. Not sinister as in: she plans to kidnap you and make party hats out of your skin but probably a bad idea in that she plans to use you as her personal taxi service/new best friend/new recruit to her brand of superstition. She could be the sort of person who, if she gets your phone number/address, will be forever pestering you for something or other, either about her imaginary friend or just because she's needy and bored. It depends how much time and patience you have to spare I suppose.

DorothyZbornak · 13/02/2019 16:40

I don't think she sounds sinister, more like a bit of a CF.

SinkGirl · 13/02/2019 16:45

Honestly, I’m amazed at the balls of some people. I have some chronic health issues and the number of times it would have been super helpful to have someone give me a lift to the station or pick something up for me are numerous but I’d struggle to even ask my close friends, let alone a person I’ve made small talk with twice! I don’t think it’s sinister though.

ReaganSomerset · 13/02/2019 16:46

Very good of you, OP. It's true that she may ask again. But that's not necessarily sinister. She's in need, you have it in your power to offer assistance. It's a great example of loving your neighbour. I think it's rather sad that the times when we showed concern for others in our community (particularly the elderly) appear to have passed.

Guineapiglet345 · 13/02/2019 17:06

Not sinister but probably a bit loopy and might be trying to slowly groom you into joining a cult (ok, maybe I’m overreacting a little bit)

I’d probably keep parking there and be friendly but don’t do her any more favours unless you want to.

Lightofday · 13/02/2019 17:20

It might be nothing but, I've learned to be very careful about people who try to get too close to u too fast or start asking for inconvenient favors straight off the bat. I tended (whether it gas anything to do with being a Christian I don't know) to go through life just assuming people considered other people...and were mostly good. I think when we are normal, kind sorts, we just assume others are too... Boy was I wrong.

I think you were right to do her that favor...(did she offer petrol money?) but I would be wary in future because asking a practical stranger for a favor early on...I've learned that many not nice sorts, start out that way in order to test your agreeableness. Then if u fail the test...before u know it, they have u doing all sorts of things for them. And say no and you'll see their true colours show.

Be nice, just be tentative. Don't ignore red flags like them pushing boundaries ect.. Always trust your gut, if things start to get odd,get away fast.

Parthenope · 13/02/2019 17:23

I think it's nice, that in the world of religious hatred even denominational amongst "christians". To see an RC n Baptist get along is great, and the "Christian thing to do".

I was unaware of the 'hatred' between Catholics and Baptists, and I'd be very surprised if the OP gave this woman a lift as an ecumenical initiative.

Not sinister, but potentially annoying, unless you don't mind being the answer to her "prayers" every time she needs a lift.

This.

dayswithaY · 13/02/2019 17:38

It's not sinister but she has seen you as a very kind person who will be very happy to give her regular lifts. If this is ok with you then crack on and enjoy her company. But ask yourself would you leave a note like that on the car of a person you had chatted to twice? Asking for a favour which involved them going out their way? This happened to me with an elderly neighbour. She called out to me one day so I chatted to her - didn't think twice when She asked me for my phone number.

Next morning at 7am she phoned to ask if either me or my husband could sweep her leaves, tidy her garden and check her guttering. Immediately, it couldn't wait. I didn't want to get involved in that, so politely waved from a distance from then on. If I were you I would park my car somewhere else.

Flip

1 2

Swipe left for the next trending thread