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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Teacher cannot control her class

29 replies

Teacherstress · 12/02/2019 14:35

And definitely requires support but I don't know how to deal with it without her feeling I am throwing her to the wolves.

She takes an exam support class, there are some (ahem) 'strong willed characters' in there from what my children have told me.
She shouldn't have to deal with 14 and 15 year olds being a nightmare but they are and she is spending much of the class shouting, name calling , threatening and running out crying.

It needs dealing with, the kids causing it need dealing with but in between the kids who don't care are children who find academic work difficult who really need this support and it isn't fair on them either. There are physical fights in the class.

Aibu to think she needs support and want better for her AND my children.

OP posts:
PBo83 · 12/02/2019 14:38

Sounds perfectly reasonable to me.

SnuggyBuggy · 12/02/2019 14:43

The teacher needs access to some proper sanctions for bad behaviour backed up by her department. Expecting the teachers to deal with difficult pupils without them isn't realistic.

hemcurt · 12/02/2019 14:45

Yes snuggy! I was a classroom
Assistant with no support. If you dig deeper , I'm sure you'll find that she needs support.

Original poster
Teacherstress · 12/02/2019 14:50

I absolutely agree that she needs support and said that.
I just don't know how to raise that she needs support with school or perhaps her without her feeling that I am complaining.

OP posts:
Foxyloxy1plus1 · 12/02/2019 15:14

The trouble with classes like that is that they have in them students who know they aren’t very good at the subject and need help. They feel bad about themselves and that is manifested in poor behaviour. Because they know they can do that.

I know exactly what it’s like to be in that situation and it isn’t a positive experience. If she’s on her own, she’s on even more of a hiding to nothing. The trouble is that if you raise it with someone higher up, you’ll probably subject her to a ‘support plan’. Which is not supportive at all, but means there will be endless scrutiny.

It’s not a good idea to put groups of disaffected pupils together, but it is what happens. The answer is for the pupils to engage in the lesson. I bet that won’t happen though.

It. brings back horrid memories I’m afraid.

Holidayshopping · 12/02/2019 15:16

What is your role in the school. I think the answer to that would guide me as to how I think it would be best to proceed.

CatToddlerUprising · 12/02/2019 15:19

Unfortunately it happens very frequently- classroom full of disaffected students with a few who do want to learn. School has given up on discipline and punishments as they are not effective/parents don’t want to support the school etc. By all means bring up about your child not being able to access the lessons due to disruptions but please don’t blame the teacher and say she can’t control the class. I have seen the strongest and most experienced teachers broken by those sorts of classes due to no support from higher up

SnuggyBuggy · 12/02/2019 15:21

My school was like this, no support, no system for detentions which people could be given for misbehaving so obviously the individual teachers could do nothing.

Mammajay · 12/02/2019 15:23

If you are a parent, you need to speak to the head of year or head. If you are worried about it linking back to your child, when you phone the college or school, just say you prefer not to give your name. A stroppy class needs a strong teacher or a well supported weaker teacher.

JasonGideon · 12/02/2019 15:27

I’ve been that teacher. It’s awful. You want to do the best for the children who want to learn but spend your whole time putting out fires. I have advice I could give her but not sure how you could help OP. I know you want to help but she’s probably feeling hyper sensitive about the class and any comment will be seen as personal and be taken to heart.

Mammajay · 12/02/2019 15:34

I think the op wants to help the youngsters who need to learn. If a teacher can't control her class, it is her professional duty to ask for help to do so. It is not easy for the teacher, but the teacher's job is to teach.

shortlongterm · 12/02/2019 15:58

Tell her to identify the pack leader, just go for them, hit them with a pool ball in a sock whilst yelling 'I'm the daddy now!' The rest will fall into line

sonjadog · 12/02/2019 16:03

I would phone the head of the year your child is in and talk to them about it. It might be a known problem or it might not. Sometimes teachers are so embarrassed by this kind of problem that they try to hide what is going on when they really need help. Have a chat about it and make them aware of the situation, tell them you are concerned rather than making a complaint.

Original poster
Teacherstress · 12/02/2019 16:08

shortlongterm I'm sure she would like to...

OP posts:
ShadyLady53 · 12/02/2019 17:04

Myself and a very experienced colleague had a group of 10 and 11 year olds to teach together as they were so badly behaved. We both had extensive SEN/SEBN Experience and this was a mainstream school and we still couldn’t cope. We went to the SLT and Head but they had no idea what to do either. The kids didn’t care about sanctions at all, they meant nothing to them. Many of them came from homes were their parents were drug addicts, alcoholics, sex workers, in prison etc. There was no food at home, no electric or heat, no discipline or routine or love. I cried many times hearing what they came out with about their home lives. In one class there were 5 kids with extreme behaviour. Often the big brute of a young PE teacher would have to come in to break up a physical fight. They’d just attack him instead. It was soul destroying.

Sometimes there is literally nothing you can do as a teacher and it’s awful. When I was at school the odd child who behaved like that would be excluded but that doesn’t happen now.

I still don’t know what the answer is (besides those kids having better parents) and I really feel for the teacher and children who want to actually learn, who are being prevented from doing so. I also feel for the kids who have such dreadful lives.

Arkos · 12/02/2019 17:35

We have kids who misbehave and like this. Slt don't want to know (mainly because they are scared of them and can't control them either)... we aren't allowed to set detentions (they wouldn't come anyway) and if you phone home the parents refuse to answer/ engage at all (either because they're also scared of them or because they're drunks/addicts/arseholes)
Believe me that that poor teacher will know it's awful but I would put money on it being the school letting her down.

Original poster
Teacherstress · 12/02/2019 17:51

Very sad Shady :(
I don't know what the answer is Arkos but it's sad for the teacher and very unfair for the kids who struggle but want to learn.

OP posts:
MitziK · 12/02/2019 17:59

She'll probably be 'supported' out of teaching - they don't dump the aggressive morons on a teacher who is already struggling if they want to help her improve behaviour management skills - they do it so that they go off sick/leave.

It's a very effective method of workplace bullying.

Could your DC privately be kinder to her? It sounds really cheesy, but it could make a huge amount of difference to her emotional state if she received a card (anonymous/hand drawn/whatever) saying thank you for working so hard.

None of that fixes the situation, and by the sounds of it, the culture of management at the place isn't going to, either - but sometimes it's good just to be kind.

garethsouthgatesmrs · 12/02/2019 18:23

Op I would suggest you contact the head of department by telephone. They will probably be the teacher's line manager. If you do it on telephone rather than by email you can be clear that you are sympathetic but worried rather than complaining. If its an effective department in an effective school they should do something.

BarbarianMum · 12/02/2019 18:28

It's all very well saying that the well-behaved pupils should be secretly nice to her, but that doesnt solve the problem that their learning is being hampered.

I was part of classes like this as a teen and I cant tell you how much I resented it. School needs to get its shit together.

Waveysnail · 12/02/2019 18:29

Sounds like class needs broken into smaller groups and taught at different times but that may not be practical

BarbarianMum · 12/02/2019 18:30

Shady that's ridiculous (and tragic). Either the school needs to support and manage its pupils and educate them, or it needs to pass them on to somewhere that can.

SnuggyBuggy · 12/02/2019 18:33

I imagine she has been told that it's her job to control the class. As a teen I never understood why teachers just ignored so much bad behaviour and didn't send troublemakers to the headteacher. Now I understand that they don't want to be accused of not being in control of the class.

ShawshanksRedemption · 12/02/2019 18:42

I'm assuming you are a parent who has a child in the class that is being affected?

If you're a parent, you could approach it from the angle that you are worried about your child's learning experience in that lesson and ask what support the school can put in place so that the behaviour is effectively managed. Check the school's behaviour policy and ask what should happen to the pupils that misbehave, and how can they ensure this.

garethsouthgatesmrs · 12/02/2019 18:47

Sounds like class needs broken into smaller groups and taught at different times but that may not be practical

sometimes something a simple as removing the ringleader and putting him/her in another class the n introduvlving a new seating plan and putting a couple of the others "on report" can be effective. It's all about good management. if the teacher feels supported then it frees her up to plan and deliver good lessons