To homeschool my child

[ginpink]

I never in a million years thought I would consider home schooling.

But.

My son has SN. He cannot talk and has a couple of other developmental delays (not potty trained and just very low maturity).

I think he'd love school. I'm not convinced he'd be able to access the curriculum but he is a gorgeous lovely boy and loves playing with other children in a class environment.

So here's my thoughts....

I know that pedophiles etc tend to work in any job they can that brings them close to children. I think my son would be a real target. They could do anything to him and he wouldn't be able to tell us. Even in a SN school, in fact I think that might be even more of a magnet for these horrible people as they would know how vulnerable these children are.

I am going insane trying to work out if I'm being selfish either way.

Thoughts?

If he's getting an EHCP it might not be that easy. Kids with special needs come under a different category than most

@Cyberworrier thank you. Incase you are worried - he is in nursery now and a very happy child thriving as much as he can. I am happy as there's such a high staff:student ratio, it feels safe.

I don't know why I'm so terrified of him going to 'big' school. I think because at the moment we still don't know what school he will be in (it depends if the EHCP is granted) so I don't know who his teacher will be, or even where he will physically be. Will he have to take a SN bus to get to school!? I know it shouldn't but emotionally it just makes it more stressful and a worry.

I am a very sociable person, but I don't share my thoughts like these with anyone, I'm worried they might think I'm crazy (which seems likely, after the reaction on here!)

Tbf OP, my DD doesn't have SN, but I was a wreck u til we received the letter to say why school she was in, and then I was still a wreck about her starting school. It is a big thing. I think you are getting anxious about it and letting your imagination get the better of you. My DB has serious SN (I have mentioned on other threads) he is a lot older than me, so all this is from what I have been told by my DM and DF, but they were offered a place at a very good boarding school for SN and were torn wether to send him or not, on one hand they felt if they sent him they were abandoning him and on the other if they didn't they were holding him back. He actually has an amazing life, once he finished school there, he was moved into a bungalow run by the school and he is so happy there and has a degree of Independance.
My advice is to try and calm down, take it all in stages, the first stage is hearing back from EHCP or the letter to find out what school he is going to, then to the summer holidays and preparing him for school, then the first day. It helped me.

That’s great he’s already happy in nursery. Also understandable wanting to share worries here and also not liking being unable to plan for the school as you don’t know yet. I would advise you to try to put it on the shelf until you know what school- as really stressing about it at this point is not going to help you or your son or the outcome. You know you can withdraw him if it doesn’t work out, you will find out the form of transport when you know which school. I know it’s hard but I would try to get out of the washing machine of spinning thoughts about it, as it will only increase your anxiety!

There are many more worries when your child has sn (yes transport is a big one) but not being able to report a paedophile is one that has never crossed my mind. As your child is young, try to take each step as it comes. There are so many unknowns you will drive yourself mad with worry if you thought of everything.

Even if he's non-verbal, you can teach him other ways to communicate a problem to you.

I work with child sexual abuse victims and your son is far more likely to be abused by your (non-son's-dad) partner, followed by other male relatives ( his dad, brother, uncle) than anyone at school.

I think that people's brains just won't let them believe that they are the most likely person to introduce a child to an abuser, so instead we see danger in strangers.

Anyway, it sounds like your son will thrive at school, especially if he goes to a SN school - he'll have access to SALT and OT. Any SN school I've worked at (only 2 but with different organisations) there has been absolutely no lone working, no personal care was done solo, there was just no opportunity for abuse because the kids were never left alone.

Please see someone about your anxiety. Being concerned for your son's safety is normal, being so terrified of paedophiles that you're seriously considering not letting him have normal life experiences definitely isn't.

I think YANBU about home schooling if local provisions do not meet your DC’s needs but YABU if it is about the smallest of possibilities of paedophiles. It is the same with your GP, specialist doctors, nursery staff, people you meet in the street- you don’t know if any of them are paedophiles but you can’t live your life in fear of the remote possibility of something happening