To wonder if Alcoholic is offensive

[DownToTheSeaAgain]

Spent the afternoon talking to a LO who has alcohol addiction issues. His thought is that the term Alcoholic is offensive ( we don't refer to narcoholics for example) and that it shouldn't be a requisite of AA to say 'Hi I am X I am an Alcoholic'. I guess that I am struggling with this particularly as I can't think of another way to term things.

Any suggestions?

It sounds like denial if he hasn't stopped or accepted it. What is his accepted status?
Never accuse an addict of addiction before they admit is the advice isn't it, because you will get an angry you're offending me response.
Does he prefer ' I Drink and it's a bit damaging but I know that so don't tell anyone including me if you've noticed' rhetoric?
Honestly does he think he has the problem or were you telling him he does?
It just seems weird thing to pick on with a group known as Alcoholics Anonymous

LilQuim like that one The one thing we can do is not take ourselves too bloody serious lol whatever we call ourselves

Thank you @LilQuim - LO is a past master at burying head in sand. I just struggle to help and support. They've given me the blue book to read 'to help' because they are struggling with the God aspect too.
For me it is about means and ends. If this works - great. If not we need to find something else because otherwise his life and family will be at an end.

@rosie1959 LilQuim like that one The one thing we can do is not take ourselves too bloody serious lol whatever we call ourselves

Amen!! Who knew a bunch of alkies would be sat in a cold church hall, laughing?!

@DownToTheSeaAgain they are definitely putting hurdles in the way. For you, I would suggest AlAnon - for family of alcoholics. It might help give you a better insight. The thing is, in my experience, it's nigh on impossible for non-alcoholics to help an alcoholic. What worked for me was the identification with people who had the same experiences. The blue book is great, but for a newcomer, it can be very daunting. It needs the support of a sponsor to go through it. When I first went to AA, I thought I'd rewrite it!! Lol. I'd suggest meetings, getting numbers, getting a sponsor.

Ah the God thing group of drinks if you prefer
I was daft enough to think alcohol could solve all my problems and make everything better I for another word worshiped it and could not think of life without it Alcohol was my god
I am still a firm agnostic not clever enough to say there is no God but what I did realise is that these people as far as alcoholism was concerned knew what they were talking about they had a solution for my problem
So I still don't have a god but I do have 15 years happy sobriety The door of AA is very wide and if your LO doesn't like one meeting try another they are all different

I don’t think it’s offensive but I’ve read quite a lot of “quit lit” which doesn’t like the term
“Alcoholic”. Ultimately addiction to alcohol isn’t any different to addiction to any other drug so there’s no need for it to have its own label

@rosie1959 * Ah the God thing group of drinks if you prefer
I was daft enough to think alcohol could solve all my problems and make everything better I for another word worshiped it and could not think of life without it Alcohol was my god
I am still a firm agnostic not clever enough to say there is no God but what I did realise is that these people as far as alcoholism was concerned knew what they were talking about they had a solution for my problem
So I still don't have a god but I do have 15 years happy sobriety The door of AA is very wide and if your LO doesn't like one meeting try another they are all different*

Group of drunks - I was told that very early on. Works for me. Also agnostic, so I struggled for a while, but it works for me. Almost 10 years without a drink. It was my solution too - until it stopped.

It is my belief that my very much loved family member doesn't want to accept that they are an alcoholic (or whatever you term it) and will use every and any argument to support this.

They are currently dry, attend some meetings but haven't bought into the process.

I don't know what to do. I will listen for as long as my ears will hold out and am available to pick up the pieces. Arguing in a gentle way about semantics is the only way I can currently help.

For me it is about means and ends.
Op that’s great that you want to help him, but neither you nor anyone can stop him drinking until he wants to stop.
You didn’t cause it
You can’t control it
You can’t cure it.

A pp has suggested al Anon - you would get lots of support and help there.

Why argue semantics? he is looking to criticise the meetings and prove them as useless from the sounds of it. That's his choice.
You can ask to change the subject

I found it 'offensive' when I was actively drinking. I didn't want to admit to it or deal with it at that time.
I'm comfortable with it now I'm in recovery.

Above was in response to the Ops first post.
Have rtft now.
AA isn't for everyone. I tried a few meetings and loathed everyone. A lot of that was because of the God/Higher Power stuff. Some members told me to ignore 'the happy clappers' as they called them. I couldn't do that.
I personally found my local alcohol service was much more effective for me. I still did group work, but had one to one support along side the group meetings.
I know AA is amazing for lots of people, it just wasn't for me.
I agree with pp. You can't change your LO relationship with alcohol. It has to be their choice and their desicion to address their issues.
Definately look at Al Anon, they offer amazing support and sanity.

Should have said in my first post, currently in recovery. Obviously I'm still an alcoholic. I will always be an alcoholic.

I think AA can be massively off putting, especially by people who are put off by the God stuff and prone to intellectualising everything. It is not by any means the only way to stop drinking. It works for lots of people but there are lots of people it doesn't not work for.
The elements that have been proven to work are making a decision, taking responsibility, a period of abstinence and social support. There are other ways to get all of those things, but AA had them all in combination. Look into SMART recovery and alternatives in your area. Some of them don't even ask people to say they are alcohol dependent or want to stop to start with, but get them to start seeing what their alcohol consumption is doing to their lives (personal responsibility) in a group setting (social support) which often leads them to make a decision to have a period of abstinence.

A wise old timer I know uses god as an acronym for "good orderly direction".

Almost 16 years here thanks to AA. Take what's useful and don't sweat the rest. No solution works for everyone. But there's a lot of wisdom in the rooms and in the literature.