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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that this is just wrong?

162 replies

HiddingMyIdentity · 07/02/2019 17:34

A girl I know, lets call her K, recently had a baby. K has just turned 18, and she was living with her sister and nephew. K and baby clearly had their own room judging by the 500+ photos she shares on shapchat daily.

K just shared a photo of her new house keys. Apparently for her and baby, government funded of course as K has never worked a day in her life.

Ireland are having a massive homeless crisis, hostels and hotels are full to the brim with families, and K a few weeks after her 18th birthday gets given a house??

I work 50 hours a week, and had to move county to afford to rent a house. Yet this one pops out a kid at 17 and gets handed a house, that I and all the outer tax payers of Ireland are paying for, as her 18th birthday present from the State!

There are families out there in much worse living conditions than K, who have been on housing lists for years, why should she get a house ahead of them??

Is it just me who thinks that this is wrong?

Sorry I needed a bit of a rant!

OP posts:
ReanimatedSGB · 07/02/2019 19:54

Another benefits-bashing fuckwit, eh?

Bussells · 07/02/2019 19:59

I wouldn’t begrudge an 18 year old with a baby a house, no. Why don’t you concentrate on your own life instead of being a bitter busybody?

x2boys · 07/02/2019 20:07

Well guess it depends on how much socisp housing is available, i think the days of just being given a council house because you have had a baby are long gone in many parts of the uk at least , i dont know about Ireland .

45andahalf · 07/02/2019 20:07

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

QueenieInFrance · 07/02/2019 20:10

I don’t de rouge a house for a single mother and her baby. 18yo or older.
I do have an issue with anyone been given a house when they already have somehwre to live when there are others who dint have a house at all and have to stay in a hostel etc...

The way housing is given and the way people are prioritised someth8g boggles.

Having said that, the appropriate answer to the issue is to have more social housing....

claireandlilly · 07/02/2019 20:11

What people post on social media is not fact. Clearly she meets the criteria for being housed and is entitled to not disclose why that is to every one else!

I had a baby at 18, I relied on social housing, I also had to put up with all the 'shame' from people like you.

BTW I worked my arse off to leave that social housing, rent some where privatley and eventually buy my own house.

A post like this says a lot about the sort of person you are and nothing about her.

How about everyone offering support to young mums who would jump at the chance of a bit of guidance rather than judging and criticising them.

Just my personal oppinion Hmm

Nothisispatrick · 07/02/2019 20:13

ATBhinchers

In what way is the country fucked because of this? Do you think this would be a better country to live in if young single mothers were left to be homeless?

Schuyler · 07/02/2019 20:14

ATBhinchers “Free childcare if both parents work full time from age 1 should be the rule at the minimum.”

That is completely and utterly bonkers. Why should the taxpayer pay for this for parents who can afford it? I have children; we paid childcare. No issue for those on a very low income.

I don’t envy single teenage mums. I’m sure it’s very hard

AliyyaJann · 07/02/2019 20:15

It's not the baby's fault the mother's a dimwit. But the baby needs a roof over it's head, yet so many young families.

AliyyaJann · 07/02/2019 20:17

I do have an issue with anyone been given a house when they already have somehwre to live

Yes. Housing Associations are bad for this. I know a housing co-operative where most of its members own property, but don't want to move out of HA homes because they want to live the life in London. It's corrupt.

AliyyaJann · 07/02/2019 20:18

They own property outside of London.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 07/02/2019 20:19

It's not the baby's fault the mother's a dimwit.

How is the mother a dimwit? Confused

VanillaBlossom · 07/02/2019 20:22

Why is the mother a dimwit 'Aliyya' ?
Yes it's frustrating for us all working our bollocks off for everything but do we really know the circumstances...she is 18, she could be making the best out of a bad circumstance. I wouldn't begrudge her or her baby...at least they are housed.

GlitterStick · 07/02/2019 20:22

It's not the baby's fault the mother's a dimwit

Well, aren't you peachy. Hmm

DoneLikeAKipper · 07/02/2019 20:24

Having said that, the appropriate answer to the issue is to have more social housing

Here is the real fact in black and white. Yet we are living in a culture where, when unhappy with our own lot in life, we find someone who has even less than us to blame and give a good kicking. Instead of pointing the finger up at those who have the powers to help, yet choose not to, we point down at those who live in circumstances we’d not want to be in ourselves. This perpetuates anger at the wrong people in society, and is why society itself doesn’t work. We have forgotten how to give a shit about others, we only judge on snapshots as we mindlessly flick through our phones.

Don’t be poor, don't be young, don’t be old, don’t be a refugee and don’t be a single mother because apparently you’re just a waste on society.

GlitterStick · 07/02/2019 20:27

well said @DoneLikeAKipper, completely agree

Mimithemouse · 07/02/2019 20:29

Do you know her in real life? Next time you see her out with the pram, give her the filthiest of looks or even better when the kid starts school you can stand next to her in the playground and talk loudly about 'these young girls getting free houses'.

Notsurprisedatall · 07/02/2019 20:33

She will be on universal credit, she won't get a fortune with one baby at her age, as she's under 25 it she will get less.
She won't be rolling in it and the cost will have to come out of her universal credit.

Go and have a look at the universal credit benefit calculator, then you might have some empathy!

17 pregnant, single, baby at 18 and a house with bills! That is a lot of responsibility and no doubt she is scared, anxious and struggling.

Sounds like a shit tonne of fun... Not!

BanginChoons · 07/02/2019 20:36

"Given a council house".

Do people not realise that tenants have to pay rent on social housing?

VanGoghsDog · 07/02/2019 20:40

She's not been 'given a house' has she, she's been provided with accommodation for herself and her child. Where she will have to pay rent.

Firstimemama · 07/02/2019 20:41

You are so bitter, you are actually comparing your life to hers. She doesn't own the house .. are you forgetting the difference between someone who works and buys a house AKA investing money and someone that rents/is provided a house because they have nothing ??!

AliyyaJann · 07/02/2019 20:42

Cheap rent

AliyyaJann · 07/02/2019 20:42

And potentially a lifetime tenancy

EmeraldShamrock · 07/02/2019 20:45

I get what you're saying. There are 1000s waiting on houses, many in private renting having to top it up by 100s, homeless etc.
It sounds like K was under the care of social services possibly fostered. Most DC after 18 when they have a baby and are in care usually get a house much quicker.
My friends daughter went into care at 16, she is 18 now and she got a house when she was 6 months pregnant.
You're right it is not always fair but most of those girls are usually in a more needy situation, as lots do not have any family support.
Was her DSIS her foster carer or guardian.

Notsurprisedatall · 07/02/2019 20:49

"Cheap rent"... God job cause she will get sod all money on universal credit.

"And potentially a lifetime tenancy" worse than her being homeless?

And if it is a house that is too big for her needs she will be hit with the bedroom tax and some point.

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