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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To say something to head mistress....

15 replies

Sophisticatedsarcasm · 06/02/2019 06:37

Dd is 6 and absolutley loves school, so much so that she cries when it is half term. She started the school year with 2 teachers but one of them left over the Christmas half term and we are due for another one after the February break. So to fill the space they’ve had a supply teacher and the other teacher has picked up an extra day. The last couple of weeks only on a weds and thurs she asks if she can stay home because the supply teacher isn’t a very nice lady (her words not mine) I’m not sure wether to say anything but it’s breaking my heart when she says she doesn’t want to go to school and I’m wondering if this teacher really is a horrible teacher with the kids?
What’s my best course of action here? I know her other teacher is strict as known her for years so it can’t be b3cause of that... I just can’t figure out why else she’s having such a negative affect on dd

OP posts:

JMKid · 06/02/2019 06:40

It's probably just cause she is new and has a different teaching style. No need to go running to the head mistress. Give her some time to get used to her.

User383673 · 06/02/2019 06:41

I wouldn’t make any specific complaints because you don’t really know if the teacher has done anything wrong. But it might be worth having a chat with her teachers or the headteacher to see if they’ve noticed any issues. See if they can help you get to the bottom of it.

Original poster

Sophisticatedsarcasm · 06/02/2019 06:43

I don’t really wanna go to headmistress if I can help it, one she don’t really like me and 2 I don’t really like her but she’s good with the kids. I probably won’t say anything as the permanent new teacher should be started after feb half term so she only has 2 weeks with this supply teacher then they have half term.

OP posts:

BikeRunSki · 06/02/2019 06:44

Do any other children. Have issues with this teacher ?

jessstan2 · 06/02/2019 06:58

Your daughter can't have a day off every time the supply teacher is working. Tell her it won't be forever and to just keep her head down and do her work. She'll get used to it and we all have to work with difficult people sometimes. I do feel sorry for her though, she's only six, bless her. It's good that generally she enjoys school,

echt · 06/02/2019 07:00

If you DD cries when it's half term then she has a lot invested in being at school.

My DD didn't like any teacher after her favourite left in Year 3. I very nicely told her teachers weren't there to be liked, it was whether they are any good at the job.

Try asking your DD exactly what constitutes "not a nice lady", it may something serious or just her way of saying she doesn't like a new teacher.

Bloodyfucksake · 06/02/2019 07:33

You can't really go to the head because the teacher is 'not very nice'- you have no evidence of anything at all going wrong. Just an opinion, founded on What? Can they then complain about your parenting because you don't seem 'nice'?
Find out exactly what your DD means and then decide what to do.

Chocolatecake12 · 06/02/2019 07:39

Wait til she gets to secondary school. They’ll be teachers she likes and teachers she doesn’t and how’s a great time for her to learn that not everyone has the same style of teaching.
It’s only for 2 more weeks. I’m the nicest possible way - she just needs to get on with it.
And going to the headteacher is a ridiculous idea.

Babdoc · 06/02/2019 07:39

I agree with the PPs that you need to ask your DD to be specific- what exactly has this teacher said or done? It could be something trivial, like she told DD off for talking in class, or was a bit sarcastic, right up to serious violence such as cuffed a child round the head!
If it’s minor, reassure DD that she’s leaving soon, a new teacher is coming, and we don’t have to like all our teachers, just be able to work with them. If it’s serious then you will have to go to the head pronto.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 06/02/2019 07:43

Does any other kid have issues?

WithAllIntenseAndPurposes · 06/02/2019 07:45

Dear me sounds like your and your DD have issues with 'not liking' people
Why do you think the head doesn't like you?

Russell19 · 06/02/2019 07:57

Just wait it out :(

Original poster

Sophisticatedsarcasm · 06/02/2019 14:11

@WithAllIntenseAndPurposes I know she doesn’t like me due to an incident with my DS a few years back.
He is prone to nose bleeds, I’m talking 4-5 per week and one day I get called to the school. Head teacher ( who was his teacher back then) says that he had been having the nosebleed for 30 minutes and he hadn’t been doing anything. I’m like okay, go through to medical room without her as she got called to another classroom. The receptionist and DS both told me it was only going for about 10/15 minutes, and that he had indeed been running around the playground like a lunatic. So she basically exaggerated it and wasted my time. I took him home anyway, went to the drs and they wrote a sarky letter stating unless it happens for longer than half hour there is no need to go home. She never spoke to me after that especially as I made a point of dropping it in and handing it straight to her.

OP posts:

Original poster

Sophisticatedsarcasm · 06/02/2019 14:13

I don’t know if other kids have complained, my dd loves all the other teachers, it’s just this one. I asked her what is it she does, she just said she shouts all the time and she’s just not a very nice lady, that’s all I can get out of her.

OP posts:

waterrat · 06/02/2019 14:18

Okay - so people on mumsnet tend to say you should trust teachers. And I do love teachers! BUT - in my sons reception year there was a teacher the kids kept complaining about - and it turned out she was really shouting at them - and she got fired! that was in a very good local primary - I really do think children need to be listened to.

At a young age children should not be afraid of the adults around them - sometimes a teacher may not be aware of the impact they are having.

I spoke to my sons teacher once about his tears on coming out of school - that he was finding it difficult in a few ways - she was shocked and went out of her way to get to the bottom of things. For which I was very grateful.

It's a two way relationship - but I think you need to start with head of year not the head of school.

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