Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Road ragey driver yesterday

102 replies

perfectlyspherical · 28/01/2019 12:50

Picture the scene. Sunday afternoon, M5 southbound near Bristol. Left lane pretty full of traffic, me in my little Toyota Aygo struggling a bit in the high winds. Satnav tells me in two miles I need to keep right to get to Cribbs Causeway. Check middle lane, it’s empty. So is fast lane. I move over, figuring two miles of empty lane, not a problem to anyone and I’m less of a threat to my own and others’ safety in an empty lane than a fairly full one in this high wind.

Woman in a white car (Subaru, I think) pulls in right behind me, tailgating hard. Maybe half a metre between my car and hers? Flashing lights like crazy, gesticulating very angrily at me to move over. It’s not safe for me to move left as too much traffic and I don’t want to mess up the manoeuvre in such high wind. Besides, it’s now about 1.5 miles till I’ll have to be in this lane anyway. Fast lane is empty, she could simply overtake me. Which she does, after a minute or two of trying extremely aggressively to intimidate me and make me move over.

She then zigs back in front of me, zags into left lane, right in front (and I mean right in front) of a lorry who has to move over to prevent himself crashing into her.

Why do people drive like this? I fully accept I was lane-hogging, however I was no danger to other traffic and no obstruction to her overtaking as the fast lane was empty. In high winds, me driving in an empty lane in my little car is much less dangerous to me and others. I couldn’t have moved over safely due to volume of traffic in the left lane, and I would have needed to move back over fairly swiftly anyway. It’s the look of crazed anger in her eyes that shook me the most. Like she was some self-appointed lane cop or something. Genuinely did make me wonder if she was on something.

Anyway, probably will be told I was the rude one for not moving over but like I say, I couldn’t have. She nearly caused a pile up in the left lane herself! Just wondering what others thought of the situation?

OP posts:
CuriousaboutSamphire · 28/01/2019 13:40

I too know the road OP means and it is not at all unusual for drivers to anticipat ethe road splitting. It gets very busy and traffic there travels very fast, so getting out of the inside lane is not always and easy task (somehow shoppers at Cribbs are single minded beasties Smile )

I would also have anticipated the split and pulled out earlier than I would for other junctions, it makes sense if you travel that way regularly.

However much slower than 70mph OP was travelling the other dirver was a dangerous menace. You just don't use your car as a method of chastisement, ever. Let alone at 70mph on a busy motorway!

Consolidatedyourloins · 28/01/2019 13:41

If you can't find an opportunity to indicate and move into the left lane in 2 miles, then you shouldn't be driving on the motorway.

You are trying to make yourself seem pitiable with the 'my little Toyota Aygo struggling', but I also drive a small car and can maintain lane discipline, regardless of the weather.

She was BU to be aggressive but for you to maintain you couldn't have moved into the left lane is either mendacious or poor driving skills.

livs1987 · 28/01/2019 13:42

Frankly yes she sounds aggressive but you sound like a shit driver.

loobyloo1234 · 28/01/2019 13:46

2 miles hogging the middle lane? YANBU about her being a nob, but YABU if you do not see that you are also in the wrong. Just move over and drive properly

SassitudeandSparkle · 28/01/2019 13:47

The other driver was probably trying to cut in to the left-hand side of the split very late, which is dangerous in itself!

Those of us who know the junction also know that a lot of people move into the lane they'll need early so what the OP did is not wildly out of line.

It's not a case of staying in the left hand lane and not taking an exit - the left hand lane splits off completely leaving two lanes (middle and third) going towards Bristol/Cribbs. It's the same going the other way as well.

Satsumaeater · 28/01/2019 13:48

I don't know that bit of road, but there are similar splits further down the M5 (near Exeter) and just beyond it (when the A38 splits to the A38 and the A380). I would prefer, every time, for people to plan ahead and get into the right lane early.

People are hysterical about middle land sitting. It is very annoying when someone sits in the middle lane doing 50mph. But undertaking to make a point when there is an empty outside lane you could use instead is ridiculously stupid.

ItsAllGone19 · 28/01/2019 13:49

YABU because...

  1. There's no such thing as a fast lane
  2. Driving alongside traffic in high winds is more dangerous than reducing your speed and staying in the lane and flow of traffic especially passing lorries!
  3. If there were 2 miles to the lane switch point and the middle lane was otherwise quiet you didn't need to prepare to make your manoeuvre for at least another mile, maybe more if the lane continued to be quiet

Woman in white car was a fucking idiot and dangerous to boot, but that doesn't excuse your poor road placement or driving and by your own admission breaking the law by lane hogging. Her reaction was way over the top but your actions were not blameless.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 28/01/2019 13:51

I'm not sure everyone has realised that, Sassitude Comments would seem to show that!

It does get very heavily busy and stays fast moving. You get drivers who recognise the split too late all the time - that can be heart stopping! It often makes good sense to anticipate issues and to get into the right lane a bit earlier than usual.

mumtobe2019 · 28/01/2019 13:53

If you don’t have the confidence to change lanes between a 2 mile distance then I don’t believe you should be on the road!

Also, you need to get to grips with the Highway Code as drivers should never overtake another car from the left hand side. I can’t believe you have suggested this as a solution!

Yabbers · 28/01/2019 13:54

I would prefer, every time, for people to plan ahead and get into the right lane early.

The road markings and signage guide you as to when you move into the correct lane. 2 miles back from that junction, there isn’t any hint you should move over.

For sure, keep an eye on traffic and if the road is very busy and if you think you might struggle further up then move over. But on a practically empty road it is unnecessary.

People are “hysterical” because lane hogging is a real problem on multi lanes roads. That’s why it is an offence.

SilverySurfer · 28/01/2019 13:54

There was no need for her to drive aggressively, nor was there any need for you to be sat in the middle lane bec ause you needed to be there 2 miles ahead. It also depends on your speed and if you were overtaking vehicles in the left lane at the time.

Yabbers · 28/01/2019 13:55

that a lot of people move into the lane they'll need early so what the OP did is not wildly out of line.

“Everyone else does it” is not a defence. Especially not when the road was very quiet.

Ihaventgottimeforthis · 28/01/2019 13:56

She sounds like a dangerous idiot, you made an odd decision to drive in the overtaking lane, unless you were going faster than the traffic in the inside lane (especially if you didn't have full control over your car).

Just call it quits.

loobyloo1234 · 28/01/2019 13:58

If you don’t have the confidence to change lanes between a 2 mile distance then I don’t believe you should be on the road!

This with bells on

NameChangeNugget · 28/01/2019 13:59

I think you were both in the wrong & equally as dangerous.

Escapenextyear · 28/01/2019 13:59

OP is getting a lot of stick but my understanding is, if lane 1 was soon to be peeling off to another motorway/A road/whatever then lane 2 can be treated as first lane as soon as the overhead signs dictate this. So she doesn't necessarily need to be overtaking in lane 2 (again as long as signs confirm which lane leads where) however around lorries you should always be very mindful and avoid being alongside them.
And yes being in a small car can make you feel very vulnerable in high winds and amongst lorries but that would mean lane 1 is usually your safest bet except when needing to change for your destination as OP says she had to.

CuriousaboutSamphire · 28/01/2019 13:59

The road markings and signage guide you as to when you move into the correct lane. 2 miles back from that junction, there isn’t any hint you should move over. I think there is, isn't there? It's about 2 miles when the first sign that alerts you to the junction. At 70mph that gives you just under a minute to make your manouevre before you get to the reminder signs, the changes to white lines and the overhead signs and then the cut off point.

I'm not sure OP was way too early. Yes, it sounds though she was hesitant and a bit slow. But not wholly out of tune with the usual traffic flow there, especially at weekends, shopping times.

mumtobe2019 · 28/01/2019 14:00

*Sorry, I misread your original post. I thought you were in the ‘fast lane’ not the ‘middle lane’ (I am aware there is no such thing).

The driver behind you was therefore a knob and should have simply overtaken you in the ‘fast lane’ without the need for any aggression.

However, I wonder if you were driving at a dangerously slow speed and the driver behind you flashed you to make a point?

CuriousaboutSamphire · 28/01/2019 14:02

Especially not when the road was very quiet. Who said it was? OP said the left lane was full (as is usual there) and she pulled out into an empty middle lane, which didn't remain empty for long.

A full LH lane isn't 'very quiet' !

Jellyonawonkyplate · 28/01/2019 14:05

Your manouvre wasn't ideal but she sounds mental. There seems to be more angry people than ever on the roads lately, people seem under so much pressure and very little self-control. She could have easily overtaken, which is what a normal person would have done.

GruciusMalfoy · 28/01/2019 14:09

I'd say you were both in the wrong, but she was far more dangerous in her driving. Did you move into the middle and slow down? Just wondering why you felt safer in the middle than in the LH lane.

I don't know that road, but there are parts of the motorway I use which do the same thing, 2 miles is a bit of a distance, you really didn't need to be in the middle lane so early.

Onlyjoinedforthisthread · 28/01/2019 14:10

If she tail gated you for 1 to 2 minutes you were obviously more than the 1.5 miles from where you have to get in lane that you state other wise you would have been past the junction. Have you thought about some revision lessons

Tara336 · 28/01/2019 14:11

If you were overtaking it didn’t matter you were in that lane you had every right to be there. There are some real idiots on the road and nothing justifies her behaviour. I see some real horrors as I drive a lot of miles including the extremely elderly guy yesterday on A1 who stopped in the driving lane ... yes that’s right stopped to peer at the sign on the slip road to seee if it was the junction he needed! Sorry OP lane hoggers are a peeve (although as no one uses the left hand lane I find my journeys tons quicker by being the only one in it)

BitOutOfPractice · 28/01/2019 14:13

Yes she drove like a knob but I feel her utter frustration at having to manoeuvre around vehicles in the middle lanes who shouldn't be there. Two miles is far too soon to be pulling over.

thedancingbear · 28/01/2019 14:14

If she tail gated you for 1 to 2 minutes you were obviously more than the 1.5 miles from where you have to get in lane that you state other wise you would have been past the junction

Not if the OP was travelling at around 50mph