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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think I am being forced out of midwifery?

307 replies

ThisMustBeMyDream · 27/01/2019 00:39

I've been a midwife for 12 years. I have a wealth of experience and skills.
But I am also a single parent (not through choice).
I have no family support. Ex husband doesn't involve himself with the children.
I'm in so much debt from paying for a Nanny so I can keep on working.
I can't do it anymore.
Work won't help.
I feel absolutely lost and distraught that for 12 years, I have fought hard to make this work (I was a teenage mum when I started my training). And now I can feel it slipping out of my fingers.
All I wanted was to work as a community midwife so I can use regular childcare. But no, this can not be accomodated due to the government deciding 80% of women should have continuity of carer (Better Births recommendation, which was then used in the NHS Long Term Plan). The traditional community model is going to go to a caseloading model which involves community days, along side hospital shift work. My employer has stated even if I could do the caseloading model, I can not stay part time either (I am currently part time as I have 3 children to manage, and one has additional needs).
These changes are allegedly happening in all Trusts as a result.
I'm going to lose my career. What the hell am I going to do?

OP posts:
FruitCider · 28/01/2019 07:27

many health workers don't understand why Tuesday to Thursday 9-5 isn't compatible with the needs of the service and think they are being unfairly treated if not allowed to work those hours.

Literally I don't know any HCP who requests those hours.

I have a flexible working agreement. It means I don't work more than 2 13.5 hour shifts back to back, im given 2 rest days following working 2 shifts back to back, I don't work 2 weekends in a row, I don't do more than 2 nights in a row and I have 8 weeks rota in advance. So basically my agreement just makes my employer follow RCN recommendations. I only work 31.25 hours a week because I'm expected to do training as over time. This month I have 4 days training x 7.5 hours so I'm actually working 38.75 hours a week. If I worked 37.5 hours a week I would be forced to work 45 hours a week on a frequent basis to fit mandatory training in.

JiltedJohnsJulie · 28/01/2019 07:39

Could you talk to the Nursing Bank at your Hospital about swapping your contract over to them! You should keep the continuity in your contract and will be able to choose your shifts. Possibly not very ethical but it might work for you.

Have you taken any advice on your debt? I haven’t read the whole thread so apologies if this has already been addressed Thanks

Stormy76 · 28/01/2019 07:49

Speak to your union, look out the policies on equality etc, maybe the ward clerk or admin can help you with that. Think about retraining as an option, there is a real shortage of nurses in mental health working with pregnant and post birth patients. There I s a shortage of mental health nurses full stop and lots of them on part time contracts.

Sarahandduck18 · 28/01/2019 07:53

When your eldest reaches 16 they are legally allowed to be left in sole charge of younger children, could you do night shifts and work around that?

Are there any childminders locally who are willing to work til 8.30?

What about a mother’s help/ babysitter for 6-8.30 and 7-8 am?

I take it school does before and after school clubs 8-6?

Can you move closer to family to help?

Find other single mums to swap with?

If dc has behavioural issues are they entitled to dla?

Can you move to a cheaper area to get an extra room for an au pair?

anotherdaygoesby · 28/01/2019 07:53

It seems like they are trying to provide a gold standard service on a brass tack budget and will blame midwives for lack of flexibility when it doesn't work.

I truly believe that there is an ongoing, plan in place to completely undermine and destroy the profession of midwifery in the UK.

This is the NHS all over. I've left after 15 years for this reason. I agree they are forcing HCP out. I'm a nurse and have been essentially forced out by the pressure

PoutySprout · 28/01/2019 07:55

When your eldest reaches 16 they are legally allowed to be left in sole charge of younger children,

Which law is that?!

Wrongdissection · 28/01/2019 08:02

@user139328237 get over yourself. Are you a midwife? Or a nurse? Or are you a member of the public that believed the phrase ‘public servant’ is literal because ‘you pay our wages’ 🙄

No one goes into Midwifery to work tues-thurs 9-5. We all know that bank holidays, Christmas etc away from family is part of the deal but what the government are imposing on us with the funding they’ll give us quite frankly unworkable and dangerous. But it’s sold to us as ‘what the women want’ and if we complain then yet again we’re being precious or don’t understand the job. I’ve done the job for quite some number of years now, I know my strengths, working on call and holding a caseload is not one of them so I reserve the right to get out if that’s what my job will become. As does the OP and anyone else on this thread.

BonfiresOfInsanity · 28/01/2019 08:05

My community midwife was an mean cow, I’m glad I had a different midwife at hospital with DS1. But reality surely is that you can’t guarantee continuity? I was in hospital with DS2 for three days before having him and must have seen 10 different midwives, I really didn’t care at that point.

Also what if your midwife is ill the day you go into labour, or on holiday or dealing with two or three other women who’ve all gone into labour that day? As much as we love to think planning child birth is easy it’s as chaotic as life itself.

Much worse than not having continuity of care is having no care due to no midwives. There was a thread on here the other day about the shortage of staff on postnatal wards, will this policy sure ain’t going to help that situation.

Lovelydovey · 28/01/2019 08:15

So what happens when labour is prolonged - mine were born 36 and 48 hours after my waters broke. Is the same midwife expected to attend me for that whole period? She’d be exhausted and not in a fit state to care by the end - and that’s the point I’d want someone most on the ball!

icannotremember · 28/01/2019 08:27

I think I might be a bit unusual in that CoC just wasn't important to me in any of my pregnancies. I wanted to see good HCPs at my appointments and to be cared for by good HCPs when I gave birth, but it didn't matter a jot to me which HCP I saw each time. I wanted to be looked after by people who knew their stuff, were good at their job, and who were ok themselves. Far, far better that the midwife delivering my baby is one I've never met before but whose working conditions are good and supportive than that she is the same one I've seen throughout my pregnancy but is utterly exhausted and stressed by being forced to work an unreasonable shift pattern.

I have no useful advice, up, I'm sorry.

labazsisgoingmad · 28/01/2019 08:28

would an au pair be cheaper? or could you do a nanny share? what about doing bank nursing then you might be better off i know my daughter does bank nursing and she gets better pay

agedknees · 28/01/2019 08:31

Midwives are no longer nurses so can’t bank nurse.

LetsSplashMummy · 28/01/2019 09:12

I couldn't have cared less about continuity of care. Our doctor has a group of four midwives, you see whichever is working for appointments etc. Surely this is one of the "ideals" you can only consider if you have a surplus of staff?

I was also under consultant care, I was slightly more concerned that the obstetrician who specialises in my (unusual) medical history couldn't be guaranteed. It was still fine. It does seem that the BMC is a better union, if they haven't changed to such guarantees, even for complications, then its ridiculous that midwives have to.

Devilishpyjamas · 28/01/2019 09:22

Do you tweet OP? Do you mind if I tweet Matt Hancock this thread? He may as well know that he’s going to be losing large numbers of midwives Hmm

Why the tories can’t understand the NHS needs more HCP’s rather than politics I don’t know.

Mashedpotatobutty · 28/01/2019 09:24

Try to get into Health visiting. Monday-Friday and most are flexible

Wrongdissection · 28/01/2019 12:48

It’s sad though when people like OP actively want to be midwives yet can’t because they’re forced into a way of working that was absolutely not what they signed up for. I get that things change but this is pretty colossal. And it’s not usually as simple as get into HV because I don’t know about the OP but I want to midwife. Not health visit. They’re about as alike as being a brickie and an architect. It’s just shit.

Danglingmod · 28/01/2019 16:58

Yeah, quite a few of us up thread said we'd actively dislike continuity of care. I mean there are rubbish midwives, like there are teachers, doctors, roadsweepers, bank clerks, delivery drivers etc etc. If you got stuck with the rubbish one it could be either miserable or dangerous, depending. I'd much, much rather be seen by lots of different people and I imagine most people would.

Do tweet Matt Hancock.

marymarkle · 28/01/2019 17:19

I understand that the NHS is trying to do this on a budget, so it is unrealistic.But continuity of care with midwives used to be routine. I still remember being shocked when I heard a woman in labour talk about her midwife going off shift and a new one coming on. That would once have been unthinkable. You stayed until the woman gave birth and you had done all your checks.

Danglingmod · 28/01/2019 17:33

I was in labour for 48 hrs... How does that work?

Fifflefaffle · 28/01/2019 17:39

I'm sorry to hear this. My teaching career slipped away last year and I was so upset (different reasons to yours) but I know how soul destroying it is.
I now do supply. Does anything like that exist for midwifery? And if so, can you get pre-booked so you can figure out your childcare? You may not be able to solve the problem in one go but at least if you can get agency work, it might give you time to clear your head and think about a solid plan.
I hope it works out for you Flowers

Wrongdissection · 28/01/2019 17:48

Marymarkle surely you’re not suggesting that nowadays it would be acceptable to work an 18-24 hour shift and expect just as good care at the beginning as at the end?

JiltedJohnsJulie · 28/01/2019 17:51

I'm sorry, I didn't realise that MWs can't do Bank Nursing.

Chesham · 28/01/2019 17:52

How about working in an ivf Centre? Day shifts and helping women at the other end of the pregnancy journey? Or can you train to be a health visitor?? Similar situation here. I have a child with additional needs and my surgical career of 20 years is on hold, probably over.

marymarkle · 28/01/2019 17:52

No. And modern continuity of care does not mean that. Just pointing out that it used to be the accepted way.

There is lots of research showing that continuity of care and it being midwife led, leads to much better outcomes for babies and mothers.

PlatypusPie · 28/01/2019 17:58

You get continuity of care, from your obstetrician. You also get an appointment to be induced shortly before term at a time of your obstetrician’s choosing

Is this meant to be a good thing 😧? ! Horrific.

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