Wibu to take the time off anyway?

[Sharkirasharkira]

I have plans for DS' birthday coming up which I have booked tickets and paid money for - they necessitate me having the weekend off work. I do shift work and not on set days so I can have theses days off as my normal days off or as holiday. There are plenty of staff who could cover those days and they have just taken on even more staff so there is no shortage of people wanting those hours.

I told my boss before Christmas that I would need those days off, either as holiday or just as normal days off. I gave her about 6 weeks of notice and have mentioned it several times since, when I booked the tickets and just in general conversation.

I have been signed off for a few weeks recently due to stress and depression, which she has partially contributed to with her general horrible attitude and bullying towards me.

I now see that she has me down to work that weekend, when I asked about it she just replied that I should have made sure I had it off before I booked anything. She knows that I've been signed off and the reasons why but she's still massively pissed off at me because of it and badmouthing me to other staff members. She also knows that I wanted that time off. Aibu in thinking that she has done this on purpose to spite me? Thus forcing me to chose between taking unauthorised leave and potentially risking my job and letting my son down on his birthday? Wibu to just take it anyway?

Are you not able to arrange to swap shifts with another staff member?

If she hadn’t confirmed it was booked off then you shouldn’t have booked tickets until she had.

You’ll have to either swap or work. I wouldn’t risk my job for my own mistake.

She is right you shouldn’t have. Oiled until it was authorised. Although you could argue that she didn’t get back to you within a reasonable timeframe .
Can’t you get someone to swap
Shifts with you?

Is there a reason why you weren't able to get it authorized before you booked the tickets?

My holiday request form was sitting in my unlocked locker, waiting to be authorised when I got signed off with depression and was not physically there to put it in her hand. She knew it was in there and could have taken it and processed it but she didn't. She did know I wanted that time off and it because it's only 2 days I could have it as days off and not holiday.

She has form for doing things so that I get into trouble or an excuse to berate me - like not informing me until I turned up for my shift that she had taken all my uniform so I had nothing to wear. Then I was sent home for not having uniform and lost a day's pay.

My shifts can easily be swapped or covered. It's not a big deal but she is making it one.

Yes, sounds like she’s fine it out of spite. Is there anyone senior you can talk to? Although you have nothing in writing to confirm the days you wanted off neither were you told you couldn’t have it. Bullying at work is horrible

I would be speaking to HR. Explain her pattern of bullying and use this as an example explaining the details of your second post clearly. Fight this dont let it damage your career.

Ah she is obviously a bit of a cow, but on the other hand I wouldn’t have gone through your stuff to look for the form.

Sounds like you can swap shifts easily enough?

I couldn't keep track of all the annual leave people talk to me about. Unless it is on a holiday form and given to the office it is not a formal request where I work. Staff may mention things to me in passing but there's no way I'd remember specific dates. I always reply with "please put it on a holiday form or I can't process it."

Was there no one that could have handed it in for you? I'd ask someone for a shift swap.

How mean. People like that have no business being in positions of authority. Go over her head. Explain the situation. I would love to see her face if she is overruled!!
Be aware though, she may he gunning for you even more if you do successfully challenge her.
I would be looking for another job for my own sanity if I were you!

I couldn't keep track of all the annual leave people talk to me about. Unless it is on a holiday form and given to the office it is not a formal request where I work

This is how it has always been where I have worked.

If you can easily swap shifts with someone then do it.

Think you need to put a grievance against her and also run it by your union and hr.. It's abuse of power

You knew before Christmas you wanted these days off. Why didn’t you give you holiday forms in then? Although i’mmsorry You’ve been ill, the first rule,of booking any holdiday/events is to don’t book it until you officially have the time off.

Maybe as you hadn’t put in a holidaynfoem, she thought you had changed your mind, and although you planned to,have the time off, you ended up,not needing it. Or maybe she forgot exactly when you needed.

We don't have a union sadly. It's a small team, there's only 6 of us and the wider management are aware of her behaviour towards me. I was told she had been spoken to and that it wouldn't happen again but obviously it's still going on. She 100% knew I still wanted it, despite not having officially given the form in. I'm happy to swap the shifts so they won't be short staffed.

Even if the holiday form had not gone in, she could still have given me the days off as my 2 days off for the week. There's no reason she HAD to specifically have me in on those days, which is why I feel it's been done on purpose.

I am looking for other work as we speak, I can't take the horrible atmosphere there any more. Last time I was in work I was so stressed and anxious I couldn't sleep the night before and was sick at work

Sorry but I don't think you can book something without first checking you can get time off work?!

So just go above her head. Explain the full situation and that you won't be there and she needs to swap the shifts. Tell them if they don't do more about it you'll be forced to leave and sue for unfair dismissal due to her behaviour. You need to take charge here and stop taking her bullshit.

Was there not another colleague you could have contacted to get the form for you?
What do you mean that she took your uniform? Do you not wear your uniform home? Is it laundered by the company?

I don't think you have too much to feel aggrieved about on this particular matter - this issue about your annual leave is not bullying and would not be grounds for a grievance. If you think her wider behaviour constitutes bullying you will need to be more thorough in the way you go about things at work because it could easily look like you're talking about bullying, harassment and grievances because you can't always get things the way you would like them.

Actually I've just realised, before I got signed off I had left a holiday form on her desk. Another colleague confirmed this. So she had the form but it's either been lost or just not processed. No one else is off at that time so there's no reason for it to be refused.

@bastardkitty there is a lot of backstory, too extensive to go into here.

We are responsible for washing our own uniforms - I had clean uniforms hanging up at work but she removed them, threw them in a bag and declared that they were dirty (they weren't), then said I couldn't work until I had a clean uniform to wear, which I hadn't brought with me because I thought I had plenty already there. She has my phone number to tell me this in advance so I could have brought some in with me but she didn't.