To ask how to sort this issue?

[Solveigg]

A few months ago I worked on a big work project in Germany. I did my absolute best and it was brand new to me, but found it very stressful. Got on well with most of the team apart from my direct manager who was essentially a bully and ruined my time there. Seemed to take pride in belittling me. It was therefore really an experience I’d rather forget!

They have booked tickets for us all to a festival in a few weeks as a thank you, hosted on a weekend in a random German city. They’ll be covering accommodation and tickets but it’s my weekend. I really don’t want to go.

There are only three of us coming from the UK and one has already pulled out but has said she hopes me and the remaining person can still make it... he also really doesn’t want to go but hasn’t come up with a reason yet.

What can I say? I 100% do not want to go, it was traumatic and horrible. I have promised to let them know if we need a hotel booked by Monday. Have a horrible feeling the other person who is coming may throw me under the bus somehow despite saying she also doesn’t want to make it

Bump

Would you enjoy spending time with the rest of the team? I know sometimes these events can really help take the stress out of the next project once you're a bit closer to everyone. Is the manager the kind to talk about people behind their back? If they were the only one to go I'm sure you'd hate to hear he'd been complaining about you all weekend.

Though saying that if you really don't want to go then don't! Just say you can't make it, or that you need to be in the UK that weekend (assuming thats where you're usually based)

I hope everything turns out okay x

Say no. It's your weekend, you don't have to do this.

If you feel the need to be polite, say it's a kind thought and thank you, but unfortunately family commitments mean you can't go away that weekend.

Thanks no I’m never going to see them again as they’re all in an office abroad . Thank god

Just say no.

You have other commitments.

And don't spend any more time thinking about it.

Just say thanks for the kind offer but you'll have to send your apologies as you won't be going.

No way should you go! He sounds like a nightmare. Send apologies, no explanation needed. Just say thanks but you have other commitments. End of

I wouldn't even consider it.

You have a prior engagement.

But OP, you have other commitments on those dates! Remember?

Thanks! Only issue is that this date has been in the diary for a month now... so they will be wondering why I didn’t say Walker

Walker = earlier

You got the dates mixed up - how terribly careless of you, such a shame!