Anyone moved house for a different school?

[Guineapiglet345]

Just wondering what other non-religious parents have done?

We live in a house we love, we’ve spent 5 years renovating it and it’s in quite a cheap area compared to the surrounding areas, so if we moved it would have to be to a smaller house or to another renovation project.

Where we are now there are 4 primary schools locally and they are all C of E, I don’t mind DD going to a faith school if they teach along the lines of “some people believe this” and collective worship is “join in if you want” but from looking at the school websites and speaking to friends with children at the schools apparently it’s quite full on. According to the websites children are encouraged to write prayers and read them out in assembly, RE is only Christianity taught as fact and they regularly take the children to the local church for church services.

I know logically that it probably won’t really matter in the long run and plenty of people go to faith schools and don’t grow up to be religious, I just feel really uncomfortable sending my DD to school to be evangelised to.

You can opt out of collective worship. There is also lots of great religion books on Amazon for kids that explain them all. Athesim for kids is a good one too. My atheist friend just tells her that the God stuff is school only and not for home.

Private school? I know a lot of them are cofe but in our experience they’re less intense.

@Asdfghjklll I don’t really want to opt her out because I feel like that would single her out as different and it wouldn’t be very nice to sit on your own every day while your friends are all together.

@racecardriver there’s no way we could afford private school and there aren’t any close by anyway.

If you are happy with house and area you are in then it is definetly manageable to let child know it is what some people believe. You just need to educate them on what you believe/don't. Also depends if you are happy with the schools in other ways.

Doesn't the LEA have to find you a place if you're not happy with a religious school?

My dc are at very full on church school. The one in reception has already told me she doesn't belive we never talk about this at home and the one in year 5 doesn't belive either and came to that conclusion herself.
So I wouldn't worry

Well in that case you will either have to move or accept what’s on offer. Does it matter that much though. There’s nothing particularly wrong with the kind of Christianity you get in schools even if it is factually incorrect. It’s hardly going to corrupt them. If you really love your house and the schools are otherwise fine I would just stay put.

@Asdfghjklll I think you’re right, we’ll just have to do lots of “we’ll SOME people believe...” at home, I’ll look at the book you suggested, thank

@moredoll I don’t think they do but if they did the closest non-religious school is on the other side of town that can take an hour to drive to in rush hour, it’s got worse ofstead ratings than the other schools so it’s not much of a choice anyway!

@burpsandfustles thanks, that helps! Maybe I’m not giving her enough credit!!

Check the admissions criteria of each school and your local councils statistics to see if you'd actually get in. A friend's children didn't get into the 6 closest high schools as 5 of them had faith criteria and one was too far. They have to get 3 buses each way - no wonder their house was cheap!

My kids go to a faith school (C of E). The school is approx 50% C of E, 25% athiest, 20% muslim and 5% other (Hindu, Bhuddist etc). The school does teach Christian and British Values. It teaches this is what Christians believe. It also takes time to explain what other faiths believe. My son is 11 and has discussed lots with me about belief (he currently doesn't believe) - I do. And exactly as you say - my stance is 'This is what some people believe....' But I allow the kids the space to make up their own mind. There have been kids pulled out of worship and religious education - but it's hard on them because going to the Church (which doesn't happen often) is seen as a jolly by the kids and they miss out. Also they can't join in the Christmas nativity which is done in R, Y1 and Y2. - We have actually just moved to be in the right place for secondary school....and I don't want to move the kids junior school because I think the Christian ethos and caring for others vibe is missing in some other schools more locally to here. But it's each to their own.....you have to do what is right for your kids. But before you make up your mind - please visit the school and don't just listen to hearsay....(For what it's worth - our kids make up prayers - typically they are one or two sentences - and at each worship one of the older kids reads one from the book).

Thanks @Ragh I’ve just checked and the closest 2 don’t have faith based admissions policies and they weren’t over subscribed last year so I’ve sent them both a quick email to ask how they would ‘deal’ with a non religious family (couldn’t think of a better way of putting it)

@user we’re quite rural and live in possibly the least diverse place in Britain so unfortunately we wouldn’t have the influence of kids from other backgrounds which might otherwise encourage the schools to be a bit less full on Christian I do agree with you that it’s not fair to pull kids out of lessons, hopefully they’ll reply to my email and say they’re not that full on!

Can I share my experience? We are not religious, but the dc go to a CoE primary school. This is because it is across the road, Outstanding and, as we are rural, alternatives are not at all convenient. I was a little reticent about sending there because of the faith nature of the school, but there wasn’t a realistic alternative and it’s been ok.

The DC (7 and 10) have followed the full curriculum, assemblies etc. They have learnt about Christianity and other religions. I would never have taught them this, so they have become more informed and educated this way. They have been on trips to a mosque and a gudwara, as well as termites trips to the church the school is associated with and nativity and Christingle services. School has never taught them any religious stuff as undeniable fact. The school also encourages their pupils to follow Christian characteristics of love, kindness, generosity etc - these are not bad things, but again, we have discussed how they are not uniquely Christian.

What my dc have learnt at school has prompted many interesting conversations at home about “this is what some people believe”, what DH and I believe, alternative views, scientific explanations for how the Earth was created, evolution etc, why some people have different or no faith, but why this is OK.

So, the dc know about religion, but also know that we don’t “do” religion at home. This method seems to have worked out rather well. They are informed, but not at all religious themselves.

I'm not sure of the solution but it does annoy me. Why should kids spend so much time being indoctrinated too. Of course not all of them will become religious but some will become confused. Even if they don't end up believing it they're wasting a large portion of their day learning a belief as fact and missing out on a broad religious education.

@BottleOfJameson I totally agree, it’s not a subject I’d usually broach with a primary age child so I am a bit annoyed that I’m going to be forced into these conversations.

And from looking at the school websites it definitely gave an Us and Them vibe so I do feel like we’re going to be treated a bit like a 2nd class citizens.