How far have you had to carry on a lie?

[whatacrapusername2306]

Not me, but I got deeply engrossed in a post yesterday. It was reported and removed because the OP was a blatant liar and admitted so. So out of curiosity have you ever told a white lie without giving it a second thought, then the whole thing snowballing? Years ago I did have an casual friend who lied about her son ‘possibly’ having cancer. He had a simple blood test, they called him back but she made the results sound like he was going to need chemo or something. All turned out to be complete BS. I saw a lot of people back off from her from then on.

When I was younger I told my friends my middle name was Anastasia. Its not. I still have the same friends so when DH and I were thinking of getting married I was totally panicked about being outed when we said our vows. We didn't have a ceremony at all in the end - for lots of reasons but this was a big one for me. DH thought I was crazy.

6 years - I had to keep the lie up.

I knocked five years off my CV. A friend was going on six months maternity leave and (successful one man band property developer) her boss was looking for cover. He had said jokingly that he was looking for the exact copy of PA going maternity leave, so I altered my CV to be just like hers and among other things knocked 5 years off. It was the year 2000 and he was not computer literate. What could to wrong, the pay and perks were excellent?

I got the job and planned to go travelling with my ill gotten gains for a couple of months afterwards. The the original PA decides not to come back and he asks if I'd like to stay on as its worked out 'really well'.
I told him I had plans to travel for 2 months. Next day he says, I have spoken to the original PA and she has agreed to come back for 2 months (she wanted the money for a yoga teaching course) so you can carry on with your travel plans but start work full time on your return. By that time, I thought oh sod it - fate. I left six years later to have a baby (not by him).

As a mixed up 18 year old, I had a temping job at a university typing exam papers up from the professors' handwritten notes and sending them to the printers. My boyfriend dumped me and i was really devastated. I took an overdose at work and then told the professor i worked with, she called an ambulance, took me into the toilets and stuck her fingers down my throat to make me throw up, and was generally brilliant.

While we were in the ambulance on the way to the hospital, she asked me if I was a Christian. I said yes - I was christened C of E so in my mind that made me a Christian (rather than a Hindu or a Jew), even though I don't believe in God. When I went back to work a few days later, this lovely lady had got her church group to pray for me, and invited me to join the university's Christian Union meetings to find solace. I didn't know how to get out of it, so went along for the remainder of the time I worked there, and pretended that I found it helpful.

I was so relieved when I got another job and could stop the pretence.

I missed the end of the made up baby thread (having told the OP to work on her plot), so didn’t see the confession that it was all a big lie. What other threads did she confess to making up?

I’m known for accidentally telling white lies, one is when I first started my current workplace I told colleagues I was allergic to dairy when I was offered cups of tea (didn’t want to say I was vegan and get the whole ‘oh vegans LOVE saying they’re vegan!!!’ remark, and I’d only been vegan about a year). 2 years on they think I’ve never so much as tasted milk, cheese, chocolate etc. but any time it’s a birthday and there’s treats of some kind there’s always a comment about how it’s weird I’ll never know what an eclair tastes like. Little do they know a few years ago I was the biggest cheese lover.

Another one someone called up my work and said ‘hi is that Julie?’ I replied ‘no it’s notagoodname’ to which he says ‘oh sorry Susan’ 🤨 a name not even remotely like mine, imagine comparing Bob with Laurence now he always asks for Susan and it’s been too long I darent correct him

sizeofalentil that is brilliant. I think you have two options:

1. Move house. This is the rational solution.
2. Totally gaslight your neighbour as follows:

Neighbour: calls baby Keith

You: Why are you calling [insert baby's actual name] Keith? (act offended)

Neighbour: You said he was called Keith

You: I most certainly did not. She's called [insert name]. Do you think I don't know my own baby?

Neighbour: Isn't [actual name] usually a girl's name, though?

You (staring at her like she's gone mad): Yes. That's why we chose it for HER.

Then always act around her like you suspect she's a little bit crazy.

I lost the end of the post too Elvis, but I did she where she admitted to being a social worker 30 years ago, but then commenting about her toddler and baby (making her too old to have kids of that age) and also having 13 children in a previous thread, then when asked she said they weren’t actually all hers. Or something of the sort anyway. I couldn’t keep up with the BS

I self nominated myself for an award- a well known one where the organisers ask for nominations. So my CV used to say that I was nominated for this award in a particular year, which is technically true but were the self-nomination to be known.

Oh gosh, baby Keith made my night

This isn’t mine, but had me agog.

Chatting to a friend/colleague, he told me that one day, his wife decided to call in sick with her work. Rather than say she had an upset stomach or a migraine, she said that she had broken her leg.

A little later, it dawned on her that going back to work might be problematic. Rather than get out of the hole, she carried on digging and ordered a crutch online. When she told him what she had done, friend pointed out that a broken leg would probably be in a cast, she gave up the lie and came clean.

I was equally and .

Many many years ago I knocked 7 years off my age as I really fancied a lad who was 7 years younger than me and knew he would never look at an older woman. We were together for about 3/4 years and he never found out. I never let him see my passport when we travelled as I said I hated the photo Thank God he dumped me instead of proposing!

Haha, Pavlovian... and I thought my husband was bad enough when he called in sick with a “sickness bug” and got a shock when they told him he needed to be 48hrs clear before coming back.

I've got a few...

Remember when the spice girls were huge? They brought out collectable photographs but they were candid snaps... I put mine in a kodak envelope and took them into school.. spent one lunchtime telling a dinnerlady all about my "holiday" with the spice girls and I wasn't in the photos as id taken them all...

Another, when I was at uni I had a bar job but also did babysitting. I was down for a day shift in the pub and woman i babysat for asked if i could have the kids for the day.. she paid more than the pub so I pulled a sickie..didn't want to just have a sick bug so pretended I'd been knocked off my bike and was bruised and had a broken toe... had to keep it up for WEEKS hobbling about. So much stress...

I told my mum I had decided to be a vegetarian to get out of eating the Christmas Ham leftovers. I stuck with it for 10 years!

DH knew someone who lost his job but didn't tell his flatmates. He would get ready and go to "work" then sneak back in after they had gone. He also made up a glittering career to his parents back in his home country. When he was in he would watch a popular daytime quiz, memorise the answers and look proper clever when they all watched it on catch up later.

@HellsBellsAndBatteredBananas I was the same, shy and quiet as a child, branded a liar, but I really believed my own made up stuff. Then I also was a victim of cse and also entered into a world of lies. I lied about everything and anything and did so for years and years and years. Created a whole persona to cope with the trauma.
Lots of therapy later and i am honest about everything.
Was so weird reading your post as it completely mirrors my life.

Sending love and light to you.

I've told a few white lies over the years that haven't snowballed bit I will take them to the grave 😉

I had a teacher in school who I spent quite a bit of time with. Now let’s say my name is Joan. All was going well then she adopted a cat called Jonsey. She thought that Jonesy was a stupid name for a cat and renamed it Jonah. Still good. Then she renamed me Jonah . I did correct her because I was so shocked and then because I felt like I couldn’t because I had already let her call me that. . The worst part is I still can’t figure out whether she genuinely didn’t realise or whether she just wanted to call everyone in her life that

@sizeofall

Not me but my bils.
When they were kids my husband was off school for a week with a bad cold. His 2 older brothers told everyone including teachers that he'd lost a testicle in a football related accident.
Everyone believed them.
Only came out years and years later... he recently bumped into an old teacher and introduced his dc and teacher commented how wonderful because he wasn't sure he coukd have children after the accident!

Barbarian has the most British story of the thread

I worked with a serial liar some years ago, the whoppers ranged from the petty "Why would you even bother to lie that you've read a book you've not read" to "that is a lie of such outstanding depth that the question it would embarrass us all" so I casually just said (she was claiming to have been stalked)
I said "if you are intending to tell the police he followed you to Y - they'll be able to check their CCTV"

Very quickly dropped.

To take a bit of unexpected depressing tone the hardest white lie I have ever told is to bereaved people that their deceased loved one was a lovely person. There's no point saying the truth in that scenario and I fear I may again be faced with telling this lie again this year.

My partner lost his job and lied to me about it for about 5 months. There were a series of ever more elaborate lies as to why his card wasn't working etc. I found out the truth 2 weeks after having our second baby, along with the fact that he'd blown all our savings maintaining the lie. We're having counselling but needless to say I don't think our relationship has a future. Please don't lie, people. Our relationship was so happy before, and now it's all been torn apart. And for what? Cowardice and pride. Sorry, I know that's not a funny one.

As part of teacher training we could pick different modules to study. One of the modules I picked was, so I thought, about supporting lgbt students. I thought it sounded a really useful course; secondary school age seems to be (from my lgbt friends) a tricky time.

On the first day I turned up and quickly discovered that it was to support gay teachers. And so rather than explain that I was straight, of course I politely pretended to be a lesbian. I made a bloody collage about my ‘coming out’. The other participants tried desperately to get me to join the lgbt society, but I made more and more extreme excuses.

@Sizeofalentil I did a similar thing leaving the hospital with my firstborn the midwife escorting us out said my son was very handsome, I said thank you, she asked his name I said "Toby". Yeah, I had a girl. Was convinced she was going to work it out when she went back in and I'd have SS at my door

@BartonHollow my auntie tells people that ring up for my uncle (he was very well known locally for being a handy man) that he doesn't do jobs anymore as telling them he'd died ended up with her having to console them on the phone.