My DD is 12 & in her first year at high school. Today was to be their first block of swimming as part of their PE lessons.
I knew she wasn’t keen & she mentioned a few times about not wanting to wear a swimsuit. For a recent holiday I’d bought her swim shorts & a short sleeved swim top so suggested she wore those instead.
All quiet until this morning.... she was very upset, sobbing & saying she wasn’t doing swimming/going to school. I told her that wasn’t an option & to get ready (previous issues not wanting to go due to friendship issues). Came downstairs & she was fully dressed, bags packed etc sitting on the sofa with her head in her hands. Eventually got out of her that she is ‘fat’ & doesnt ‘look good’ in a swimsuit. Tried to reassure her that wasn’t the case, that everyone else would be feeling the same. She said she gets changed in a cubicle for PE so suggested she does that, wraps towel round her till she’s poolside & then same in reverse. She seemed ok with that but was very quiet on drive to school.
She text at lunchtime to say she hadn’t gone swimming. She had been crying in the cubicle & when she didn’t go poolside 2 girls were sent to look for her, heard her crying & got a teacher. Teacher told her she didnt need to swim & to get dressed then spoke to her.
I haven’t spoken to her yet as she’s at her dads for tea but what do I say? I know how she feels, I was the same at high school & am not super body confident myself. I don’t want the body image thing to become a bigger issue but I also believe quite strongly that you don’t get to opt out of things in school just because you don’t like them/ they’re hard.
If you’ve managed to read all this, thank you. Anyone have any advice?