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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People who won’t go

61 replies

joeturnersleftfoot · 23/01/2019 15:57

MIL has “popped” round to see the baby (who is sleeping). She’s desperate to bloody well wake him up and bloody well won’t go home (she had been sat here an hour and a half with her feet up on the sofa).

This is a regular occurrence and she sits here for hours - arghhhhhhh!

AIBU to want my house back?!

OP posts:
Ladyoftheloch · 23/01/2019 15:59

YANBU that would drive me mad. Say ‘oh well, looks like he’s out for the count! Oh well, next time hopefully he will be awake for you. Now I must get on with tea / laundry / my 86 chapter erotic novel about your son and the thai ladyboys’ etc.

Sparklingbrook · 23/01/2019 16:00

Sad That's really hard, you can't have somewhere you need to be because of the baby.
Could you have a sleep yourself?!

planespotting · 23/01/2019 16:00

This sounds like a nightmare
Who shows up in people's houses uninvited?!

kaytee87 · 23/01/2019 16:01

I want to know where to get a baby that sleeps for 90 minutes during the day Grin mine only started doing that after 12 months.

Tbh I'd probably wake the baby, let her have a cuddle while you make dinner then bustle her out at 5?

LightDrizzle · 23/01/2019 16:03

“Well it’s been nice to see you but I need to rest now and I just can’t do it with someone in the house sorry.”
Then lock your doors and don’t answer the next time she just drops in.

Original poster
joeturnersleftfoot · 23/01/2019 16:03

She does it a lot unfortunately!!! If only I could - OH off so don’t have the somewhere to be excuse!! Baby now awake too.

I also want to eat my cake which I’ll have to offer to share if I have it whilst she’s here!

We do have stuff to do around the house but more than anything I just want my house back rather than her here sprawled on my sofa!

OP posts:
kaytee87 · 23/01/2019 16:06

How old is the baby? When ds was 6 weeks I started going out to a class / cinema every weekday with him. Could you do that then you'll be too busy for week day visits.

DonCorleoneTheThird · 23/01/2019 16:10

I would invite MIL on specific days when you want a lazy day at home.
I would not answer the door if she turns up unannounced or when told it wasn't convenient for her to be there.

I can't stand people who think they have some kind of human right to "a cuddle" with someone else's baby.

Original poster
joeturnersleftfoot · 23/01/2019 16:10

4.5 months - yes, we do go out a fair bit but was out this morning and it’s cold so we are in this pm. We have a class tomorrow thankfully.

I don’t mind the popping in so much but it’s the outstaying welcome really. I’m going to go and hoover!

OP posts:
Original poster
joeturnersleftfoot · 23/01/2019 16:11

Sometimes I think she thinks he’s her baby, not mine!!

OP posts:
OMGithurts · 23/01/2019 16:11

Get a cctv camera doorbell and just don't answer the door to her.

LucyAutumn · 23/01/2019 16:13

Does she live nearby? If so you could maybe suggest calling her when bab is awake?

I hear you on the cake front. Maybe you need to have a secret cake in the fridge and whilst you're making her a cup of tea do a Mrs Doubtfire, but no icing face mask just a huge satisfying mouthful... ?

planespotting · 23/01/2019 16:16

Tbh I'd probably wake the baby, let her have a cuddle while you make dinner then bustle her out at 5?
Are you serious? Someone shows up uninvited are you wake the baby up for them?
Confused

DonCorleoneTheThird · 23/01/2019 16:18

Anyone who forgets the luxury of some free time when a baby finally sleeps, and comes to steal that time from an exhausted mum, should be thrown to a crocodile or something.

MikeUniformMike · 23/01/2019 16:19

Give her things to do. Ironing, vacuuming, loading the dishwasher, boring tasks and be in a frenzy of cleaning each time she comes round. She'll either stop visiting or you get a free cleaner.

Original poster
joeturnersleftfoot · 23/01/2019 16:23

Ha ha, loving these comments! Yes, she’s like 10 mins away. I am obv grateful for the times she helps us out but it’s the intrusion I don’t like, like we’d just got him down and I wanted to watch last nights Silent Witness and she rocks up. 2 hours is not “popping in”

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 23/01/2019 16:24

Say, 'Seeing as you're here, would you mind giving me a hand with some housework... thanks SO MUCH you know what it like's with a baby...'

Hand her a duster/pile of ironing/floor mop/vacuum cleaner and walk away...

fruitbrewhaha · 23/01/2019 16:24

I never woke my babies.

I would eat the cake in secret in the kitchen.

You need to come up with something to say to her next time. Tel her you are ill and she can't come in. You are catching up on some sleep while baby naps etc. Don't let her over the threshold.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 23/01/2019 16:25

Cross post with @MikeUniformMike

Elfinablender · 23/01/2019 16:27

You need to get in their first and go to her house before she can get to yours, stay while your baby is awake and then say, "well, we are going back for a nap, see you [two day's time]".

Elfinablender · 23/01/2019 16:27

Then you don't have to share cake either Wink

LagunaBubbles · 23/01/2019 16:30

OH off so don’t have the somewhere to be excuse!!

Is he in the house to?

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 23/01/2019 16:32

Aw, she loves him and she loves you and she feels all cosy and at home at your house

I would say - oh great you are here, I'll nip to the gym/have a kip/go out for a coffee/get on with my admin (take the cake) and disappear

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 23/01/2019 16:34

Take the laptop (and the cake) up to your bedroom, watch silent witness whilst eating it.

Seline · 23/01/2019 16:34

I can't stand people who do this. Stay in your own houses ffs.