I'm unhappy about this

[srav23]

Hello everyone!
This is about my relationship. it's been more than one year since I'm in a relationship with this guy who is not very expressive.. I'm 22 and he is 25. He never shares his feelings towards me nor shows.. He acts very matured and talks practically. I don't want to hear things to feel I'm on cloud 9 but at some point i feel like knowing how special am i to him and how much this relationship means to him. but he will never confess anything to me. I'm really unhappy but don't want to breakup with him. I tried talking to him about this but all he says is this is how I am from the beginning and I'm afraid if the future is also going to be same boring days as I'm living now.. I understand about the responsibilities he has and never pushes him to meet me or do anything else to make me special.. our relationship is like a relationship of couple who have been married for years.. everyday is the same and all we talk is how our day went and about normal stuff.. He loves me but he fails to show and fails to express.. but I'm tired of understanding it all myself. we don't even say I love u to each other. that really doesn't matter as well but i need to atleast feel something and hear something from him. he always has his own way of saying things indirectly.. for example : hey look at that car.. it looks more beautiful than you.. (That means he just said I'm beautiful).. I love the moon more than i love u( that means he said he loves me).. i need to understand things which he puts indirect way... do you feel me?

Yes, I see what you mean. But I don’t think he will change because people don’t usually change this sort of thing. So it means you’re not really compatible. If you need statements and expressions of love (which I understand because I do too) then you need to be in a relationship with someone who likes to express love. It’s ok to leave a relationship because of something like this. You can’t expect the future to be different. By the way I really don’t like the comparisons to cars or the moon. It sounds negative to me.

He isn't right for you. You can't make him right.

You are still young. Draw a line under this one and find someone more on your wavelength.

You sound seriously incompatible.

You don't have to break up with him - but if you don't, you're staring down the barrel of 60-odd years of unhappiness. Does that sound appealing?

Why not be single?

Or if that sounds really awful why not open yourself up to the possibility of meeting someone you actually get on with, and who can give you what you need? This means being single.

You haven't listed one reason to stay with him? Answered your own question.

Finish it and move on.

OP I’m assuming English isn’t your first language but the examples you’ve given are very negative

My ex was like this. Said he didnt like saying I Love You because the more its said, the less it means.

What he meant was that he didnt actually understand what love is, and how to love anyone other than himself. 12 years of miserable marriage later and I would recommend you dump him.

I’m 23 now, was 22 when broke up with bf of 3 years. It was exactly the same. Lack of expression on his love and such. He and myself always made excuses for it and explained it away but men like this do not change. It doesn’t happen If it hasn’t already. You need to let him go. They’re right, he’s not the one. If it’s any consolation I’ve now met someone who gives me every possible good feeling and the relief I have that I trusted myself I could experience better and now have is immense because I was anxious I was asking too much

You sound so flat and sad.
My DP is your typical Yorkshireman (sorry for the stereotyping) a man of few words but even he manages an 'I love you' once a day or so. He's (in)famous for his weird compliments 'You (ie me) were hand picked just like a nose'. But if he or anyone else ever said to me 'That car is more beautiful than you' there could be serious threat to life and limb. he is not being complimentary to you and if he is telling you that such remarks are compliments then his only possible excuse could be that English is not his first language and he only started learning it 3 weeks ago.

It is possible to have a relationship with someone who doesn't write you beautiful love poetry, who doesn't wax lyrical about your sparkling eyes, who doesn't hire planes to write 'I love you' in smoke in the sky. However there does have to be warmth of feeling. mutual respect and care for each other - and I'm sad to say I'm not feeling that with your description of your relationship. I think he means more to you and you to him, by some way. For him - you are just there. More positive than an irritant, but not someone to make an effort for. Go and find yourself someone who makes that special effort for you - they are out there.

Oh op, you are so, so young. Stop ignoring your instincts. You KNOW this relationship isn't right for you. End it now and move on. Stop wasting your time on someone who can't ever meet your needs.

He isn't right for you. You can't make him right.

This.

You simply aren't compatible. He's not going to change and both of you will be miserable if you try to make him change. Let him go and find someone who will show you the level of affection that you want.

hey look at that car.. it looks more beautiful than you.. (That means he just said I'm beautiful).. I love the moon more than i love u( that means he said he loves me)..

No! These are not nice things to say! He is saying you are LESS beautiful than that car. He is saying he loves you LESS than he loves the moon.

A man who really loves you will say he loves you, or he will show he loves you by doing and saying nice things.

I could not stay with a man like yours. You are wasting your time.