Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Vasectomy; what to expect?

27 replies

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 20/01/2019 16:05

Dear ladies (and any gents who may read this). Posting here for traffic.

We've only been together for 6 moths or so. And have been talking long-term contraception. My DP has voluntarily suggested a vasectomy. He is early 50s, I am late 40s. He doesn't have any children; neither do I. We are both quite sure that we don't want any.

He is due a counselling appointment this week to go through options pre-vasectomy. I have reassured him that it's fine to change his mind, that I can have a coil implanted if he does change his mind. I know the chances of conceiving know are small but there is still that possibility and we're trying to be responsible while also think how lovely it will be to not worry about it (although I know it's only 99% effective).

He is adamant (so far) that this is the option he wants. So my question is us for the partners (and any men) who have been through it... how do I help? Is it really painful? I know it's always described as a 'minor operation' but it is in a very sensitive place. Just asking for experience and any recommendations post-op.

OP posts:
Original poster
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 20/01/2019 16:06

6 moths? 6 months!

OP posts:
Original poster
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 20/01/2019 16:07

Apols for typos; fat fingers and small phone.

OP posts:
Toughtips · 20/01/2019 16:07

You can't help really. My DH has had it. All went well. Sore for a few days but had the weekend off and was back at work. Nothing really in comparison to child birth.

Original poster
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 20/01/2019 16:39

@Toughtips am well aware it is nothing to compare with childbirth. That wasn't my question; just practical hints and tips. Bag of frozen peas?

OP posts:
Toughtips · 20/01/2019 16:40

Ibuprofen/paracetamol on rotate and frozen peas will be fine. Bit if waiting on hand and foot for a couple of days. Should be fine.

WhoGivesADamnForAFlakeyBandit · 20/01/2019 16:44

DH walked home from his. No ibuprofen, just paracetamol. He wore supportive trunks for a bit and was back to work less than 48 hours later.

brizzledrizzle · 20/01/2019 16:46

He'll be fine, just have paracetamol and a supply of John Wayne jokes at hand.

Youmadorwhat · 20/01/2019 16:50

It depends on if he’s having it done through the scalpel or non-scalpal method??

elliejjtiny · 20/01/2019 16:51

Dh really struggled with his. More than I struggled with vaginal childbirth but less than the c-sections. He was off work for 2 weeks as he couldn't drive.

scaevola · 20/01/2019 16:53

Get trunk style underpants a size too small, and have him at two pairs (with perineal peas if he thnks that might help)

Take the advice to rest for the first 48 hours seriously.

Have in a decent supply of OTC painkilkers.

Go straight to a doctor if there is any sign of infection (heat, oozing, pain not controlled by OTC)

Make sure he does the semen tests afterwards, and do not abandon other contraception until he has a proper all clear (about half of the failure rate is down to ignoring that point)

(And don't laugh even if there is a lot of bruising, and never mention aubergines)

Doggydoggydoggy · 20/01/2019 16:53

Well, my DH has had it and it went fine.
The anaesthetic stings as for any operation but totally fine.
He wasn’t particularly sore.

I know your partner is early 50s and unlikely to want kids, but I’m not sure it’s terribly wise to do something so permanent and drastic after only 6 months together?

Unless he was thinking about getting it done anyway before meeting you.

divadee · 20/01/2019 17:05

Tight tight Speedo type pants. My other half thought his trunk type pants would be tight enough he was wrong.

Painkillers as well. No scientific research but it would seem the job scalpol method seems a longer recovery bizarrely amongst the male friends other half has asked. A lot more bruising and swelling with this method compared to the traditional way.

Peas did really help. And let him have a couple of days to take it easy.

brizzledrizzle · 20/01/2019 17:37

and never mention aubergines

Grin
Original poster
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 21/01/2019 09:20

@Doggydoggydoggy fair point, yes, we've had that discussion quite a few times and he is having counselling first. Absolutely no pressure from me.

Thanks for all the advice ladies.

OP posts:
Omzlas · 21/01/2019 09:33

Following as my DH has just received his pre op appointment. He's still convinced he'll be coming home without any testicles, no matter how hard I try to explain. I get as far as 'small nick' and he visibly goes pale (quite a feat for him) and he changes the subject.

He's having the 'non scalpel' version and I actually need to see how that's done so I can try to calm down the big man-baby.

Because of course, having a small scratch in each bollock is far worse than pushing 2 babies out of your vagina Hmm

DorisDances · 21/01/2019 09:37

A couple of sore days with paracetamol but nothing too worrying. Getting a clear result took months though

MrsMonkeyBear · 21/01/2019 09:37

Dh had his last week. Pain killers, frozen peas and supportive pants. He's more irritated by the hair regrowth than the actual incision. He's back at work today after 4 days off.

flojo73 · 21/01/2019 10:06

DH had his 3 weeks ago. Rested the day of the op and the next day. Pain was controlled with regular paracetamol for 48 hours. He was absolutely fine-I did take him frozen peas, but he didnt need them!
The counselling session beforehand was good, she made sure DH was certain about having the vasectomy and clearly described all it entails.

Youmadorwhat · 21/01/2019 10:54

My DH has the non scalpal method done and went to work the following day! He said it felt a tiny bit uncomfortable but not anything that bugged him much at all!

scaryteacher · 21/01/2019 10:58

Lots of supportive pants; make sure the cat doesn't want to sit on his lap; lots of fussing, offers of paracetemol, frozen peas etc.

The Forces cocked up where the vasectomy was happening, so it wan't on his first day of Christmas leave in our local hospital that deals with HM Forces patients; but a 4 hour drive home after the operation. I didn't make him drive! he was very uncomfortable by the time we got home though!

RayRayBidet · 21/01/2019 11:02

My DH had the next day off work then was fine. Bit tender but really not too bad.
Take the advice the clinic give.

Helmetbymidnight · 21/01/2019 11:06

Blimey, mid 50s with a late 40s partner? I wouldn't bother if I were him!

Because of course, having a small scratch in each bollock is far worse than pushing 2 babies out of your vagina hmm

A small scratch in each bollock - fine - but of course vasectomies can also go very badly wrong.

QuinionsRainbow · 21/01/2019 11:21

DH had one way back when. He had it on a Friday, spent the weekend feeling a bit sore but was back to work on Monday. He was advised to wear a jockstrap 24/7 for a week or two, and to stay off sex until he had all-clear sperm counts.

Blobby10 · 21/01/2019 11:25

My DH had the snip after my 3rd c-section and he said the best advice he had was to wear tight briefs for 3 weeks afterwards. He used Sloggies and actually carried on using them for running until they wore out many years later as they were so comfy!! Even though he usually wore boxer trunks (the tight ones) they didn't support his poorly bits as much as the briefs.

Titsywoo · 21/01/2019 11:31

DH was fine. It was entirely his decision and I was happy with it. We did the counselling which was fine although they asked a lot of questions as DH was only 30. The op was quick and DH didn't find it uncomfortable apart from the fact that a pretty young nurse was holding up his flaccid penis while the doctor did the procedure Grin. He was a bit uncomfortable for two days and lay in bed for the first day but he didn't need pain killers and has had no issues since (it was about 10 years ago).