To ask how to deal with this issue

[Extralargeoranges]

Aibu?

This has been going on for over a year now. I have a friend and her children (ages 9 and 2) are friends with my girls (ages 9 and 5) the eldest two are in same class at school. My girls never used to catch headlice. In the last year, they have had them around 10 times. They only catch them when my friend comes over with her youngest child. She has said openly she does not check youngest hair for headlice as she has thin hair and could see it if they were there.

The youngest attends a childminder and preschool now, so we dont see the youngest too much. It has been going on for a year now and I am getting sick of it. It is definitely coming from her youngest as in school holidays my kids were not around any other kids and 2 weeks before school started she came round and they caught them. It is exhausting both mentally and financially. Most times my kids have had them, it's been when they have been around the younger child. If we dont see the youngest for a while, my kids dont get them.

I have hinted loads and she does not seem to get it, and even at one point said my child infected hers. How can I go about this without it effecting the friendship too much. We are not close close friends, more like pop on for a cup of tea ect.

Stop hinting and tell her that her kid is infested with headlice?

Enough with the hints already. Tell her everything you've said here. If she doesn't wake up, the friendship is over.

For some reason I find dealing with conflict with her quite difficult. I know I need to outright say it but I am struggling doing that.

You need to tell her outright. If she ends the friendship, she does.

Speaking up doesn't make you a massive cunt or anything.

Have you tried looking at the child's head with a fine tooth comb and showing her? You should also tell her the childminder won't be best pleased if she doesn't keep on top of it. Every parent should be vigilant, especially as there is increasing resistance to the medication. Tell her you have been advised to put conditioner on the children's hair and comb through weekly with a fine-toothed comb and then wash the hair. This can be diagnostic, and also nip early infestations in the bud by mechanically raking them out before they get too established

I dont feel comfortable doing that as we aren't that close.
I have tried saying the whole household needs treating me and my husband included, even my other friend and her son had theirs done just incase.

If you’re not comfortable enough to tell her, you’ll just have to keep treating your kids when they get them. There aren’t really any other options.

I know I've two choices, tell her or carry on treating my kids (I'd still check their hair anyway and treat their hair, it just wouldn't have to be as frequent as I'm doing now) I'm just going to have to suck it up and tell her just not sure how to word it

Stop meeting up with them and if she asks why tell her.

If you're incapable of handling this like an adult by confronting the issue, then you have to stop socialising with them. There are no other options unless you want to keep getting lice.

Just grow some balls and tell her

Jeez you're a grown woman, if you don't do it for you, at least do it for your kids who are no doubt itching like hell.

I'm going to speak to her.