Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

that my manager has diagnosed as me being depressed!

4 replies

StillNumb · 19/01/2019 18:28

I had a one to to one yesterday with line manager, all positive etc. I have really enjoyed working with my team and felt very positive about them.

For background, my father died last year. Ater some thought I decided that I would not attend his funeral, and I also asked that that the news of my fathers death was not spread further than my immediate team. I've posted on mumsnet about the reasons for this before.

I appreciate that it might be a bit odd, but all ok. My team were supportive etc. I get on with what I need to, go to work, play the game etc.

Fast forward a couple of months, and I contract a viral illness. Could be brought on by stress, but about 30% of adult population get it at some time or other. I had a couple of days off, but was lucky that my symptoms not too bad and able to go to work. The viral infection has lingered on and I have had a couple more days off. I have been really ill, but now on the up.

Had 1:1 with line manager, all very positive etc. Then we came to the bit about wellbeing. I said that I had appreciated support that I had whilst unwell, which I had. My LM said that she had been concerned about my wellbeing (all good) but the team had noticed that I had suddenly gone from being bubbly (definitely not me!) to being very down. She had discussed it with a colleague and they were concerned about me and thought I was depressed. As a result of this I was offereds staff counselling, which I refused as I really don't think I need. I think my LM was a bit put out that I refused this help.

She also said that 'the girls' (my colleagues) had also mentioned that I wasn't myself and were worried about me!

I definitely don't feel depressed. I have had a viral illness and I know the reason for this and I know that I am going to get better. I feel a bit upset by what I feel is a clumsy attempt to try and help me (I know that I am lucky to have colleagues that want to do that), but I also feel a bit upset that they have all been gossiping about my wellbeing...

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 19/01/2019 18:31

It doesn’t sound like gossiping, just colleagues who have picked up in a (understandable) change in you.

You have been through a hard time, but your manager hasn’t diagnosed you as being depressed.

Amanduh · 19/01/2019 18:33

I don’t think they were gossiping. It sounds like they were genuinely concerned and looking out for you actually. It seems many of them have noticed a change in you and your emplyeebis being responsible and asking how you are and if you want some support.
I think they sound lovely.

Alwaysatyke · 19/01/2019 18:33

This sounds like a good manager raising concerns which have been brought to them by others. They've signposted you to counselling, you've declined and that's fine. I can't see that anything's been done wrong here

StillNumb · 19/01/2019 18:44

Thanks all, I definitely do have a lovely team which is why I was a bit confused... My line manager did say that she thought I was depresssed, and I had the opportunity to tell her that I definitely wasn't (and I definitely don't think I am).

Glad that AIBU has helped me get this in perspective quick sticks.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread