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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Partner told me & the kids to fuck off

13 replies

festigirl14 · 18/01/2019 19:56

Partner got back from work grumpy- kids were being loud but it’s Friday eve & we were about to watch a film. He fliipped out over something small and literally shouted at me, ds 10 and dd 6 to ‘all fuck off’ and stormed out. DS was hysterically crying - I am just really shocked. AIBU to not know what to do next?

OP posts:
Namestheyareachangin · 18/01/2019 19:58

Unless he comes back with some fairly spectacular justification or this is a total one-off I'd be considering my position. Horrible way to behave.

PotteringAlong · 18/01/2019 19:58

I’d start by asking him what’s wrong. If it’s completely out of character then I think what you do next is support him for whatever is bothering him to such an extent that he couldn’t deal with it.

User758172 · 18/01/2019 19:59

Is this totally out of character for him? He needs a pretty good explanation for behaving that way.

adaline · 18/01/2019 20:01

What happened at work? If it's completely out of character I would worry whether he was in trouble for something perhaps?

GrumpyInsomniac · 18/01/2019 20:01

I suppose it depends on how unusual an occurrence it is for your DP to get the hump like this. If this is completely out of character, I'd get the kids in front of a film and then go and calmly talk to him to find out what was really bugging him.

If, on the other hand, he's often grumpy and snappy, I'd probably still settle the kids in front of a film, but the subsequent conversation might be rather different in tone.

Did he storm off out of the house or just to another room? You make this sound out of character in the OP, and if that was the case I'd be more concerned about how he ended up going from 0-60 so quickly.

Original poster
festigirl14 · 18/01/2019 20:02

He is a grumpy old git and it’s been getting worse. I know he is tired but I dont speak to people like that when I am tired or ever for that matter. I told him that he was utterly disrespectful to me & the kids - he’s gone to bed now.

OP posts:
Aprilshowersarecomingsoon · 18/01/2019 20:02

When my exh threatened to punch my dd in the fucking face I knew his days were numbered ...
Start getting your ducks in a row op..
There really is no other way.

ChrisjenAvasarala · 18/01/2019 20:02

Oh, that's horrible. Poor kids! Big cuddles with mum, movie and sweet treats. Then later, serious discussion with him. If it's out if character, he still needs to apologise, but it's not the end of the world. If he's horrible a lot, then it's planning time.

MyKingdomForBrie · 18/01/2019 20:03

Time to ditch the shit.

QwertyLou · 18/01/2019 21:35

Totally unacceptable behaviour by him (he shouted at kids to fuck off!?). He needs to see the seriousness of what he has done and make amends.

Could he possibly have heard some highly distressing news before he came home (made redundant/ diagnosed with an awful disease.. something along those lines)?

Namechangedforthis79 · 18/01/2019 21:39

I wouldn't put up with that. He frightened your child to the point that he was crying. Fuck him. Moody bastard.

OnlyYellowRoses · 18/01/2019 22:51

Unless it was a purely one time random occurrence I'd be thinking about getting him to fuck off! Sounds really horrid for you Thanks

RayRayBidet · 18/01/2019 23:18

Unless something really bad happened just before he got home then there isn't really an excuse for what he did.
Time for a frank but calm discussion.
Which is a bit difficult if he has took himself off to bed.

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