I guess this is a bit of an AIBU but also a WWYD...
I get very tightly wound and angry (perhaps even irrationally so) when DP doesn't seem to put me first.
I'll give a few examples:
- If a friend needs some form of help/guidance he will prioritise this over speaking to me / asking how I am / spending time with me (although we live together but both work long hours). The friend part is also questionable, more likely an acquaintance/colleague.
- If we have plans, even if not exciting, and a friend asks him if he's free for similar plans/something equally unexciting he will be angry he agreed to do something with me
- He will happily stay on a whatsapp convo with a friend replying instantly and waiting for their response but will never do this with me, will always exit then look at another app and get back to me (this happened more when we lived apart)
- I suffer from bad anxiety, so he will often dismiss it / be negative about its affect on his life. But if someone he knows/a footballer comes out speaking about mental health he acts all supportive of it and an advocate for mental health
- He takes extra work on for money and the hours can clash with responsibilities he has involving me. He will always choose to still take on the extra work regardless of its affect on me and leave me to figure things out / take over his responsibilities.
These examples seem pretty small and it's hard to put into words but I find that my general feeling is to feel last if anyone were to compete. i.e. if he had to choose between seeing me for something we planned and an old friend that he could easily rearrange with, he'd always choose the friend.
I get so angry. I can't control it. Help!