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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate the comment about "why dont you have life insurance"?

263 replies

partinor · 16/01/2019 19:52

Yes if a partner dies when the family rely on their income, there will be a major impact on the finances of the household. And yes, life insurance would solve at least that impact.
BUT not everyone can get life insurance that covers everything. A LOT of people are born as children with illnesses that can have an impact on life expectancy, and so these will often not be covered by life insurance. With some conditions, it may be that you can not get any life insurance. Or the costs may be too high.
And when I was young and took out life insurance policies routinely excluded causes of death such as suicide or risky behaviour.
But easier to just blame the individuals.

OP posts:
Ucangourownwoo · 16/01/2019 20:43

When have people been asked this? It’s never come up for me.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 16/01/2019 20:43

reallyanotherone you set the terms, mine runs out in 32 years ...the length of my mortgage- after that my home is paid off so no “need” for life insurance

MischiefManagedAlways · 16/01/2019 20:43

@reallyanotherone life policies last up to age 90

MischiefManagedAlways · 16/01/2019 20:44

But as PP have said, you can decide how long you want the term to last.

Ucangourownwoo · 16/01/2019 20:44

(Travel Insurance on the other hand...I’m one of the people who asks “why the hell didn’t you get travel insurance?”)

donkey86 · 16/01/2019 20:47

@Earslaps Thanks, that sounds like what I need, I’ll check it out.

Ucangourownwoo · 16/01/2019 20:48

which is why its harder to get a mortgage later in life.

You no longer need life insurance to get a mortgage (it’s a common myth).

RubiksQueen · 16/01/2019 21:07

LifeSearch tried to be helpful but even they couldn't find anyone who'd give me cover.

I'm not even that broken (ok I'm a bit broken lol)

DaphneDiligaf · 16/01/2019 21:09

Why do I need life insurance? I have no mortgage and theres more than enough money to pay for my funeral. Genuine question.

Gillian1980 · 16/01/2019 21:10

I think it’s insens to ask someone after their partner has died as clearly it’s too late at that point.

However, it’s a valid point prior to that. Some people may not need it if they have sufficient personal wealth to pass on to their family but I would have thought that would be the minority.

DH took his out when he bought his house. I took mine out when I bought into the house and we were planning a family. I have to pay quite a bit per month due to my health issues which I realise may not be possible for everyone.

BarbarianMum · 16/01/2019 21:14

Daphne if you dont have dependents then you probably don't.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 16/01/2019 21:16

DaphneDiligaf you don’t! I only got life insurance once I had my child

Somerville · 16/01/2019 21:17

A lot of the adults who die young suffered from uninsurable conditions. Or never earned enough to pay the high premiums, because of their medical prognosis.

StowawayJo · 16/01/2019 21:17

But most people who die without life insurance are just plain fucking irresponsible, and never bought it because "it won't happen to me".

^^ yes this

And I arrange insurance on a daily basis.

BarbarianMum · 16/01/2019 21:25

But there not generally the young adults who have dependents though are they Somerville. Which is where this conversation started.

CatnissEverdene · 16/01/2019 21:25

We took policies out each when our youngest DD was about 3 months old, and we also made wills at the same time.

There is no way I'd have been able to manage if DH had died suddenly or been injured as he was self employed at the time. It wasn't a choice, it was a necessity.

JasperKarat · 16/01/2019 21:26

@donkey86 we used our independent financial adviser, he works with the companies day in and out , so knew before applying which would likely be best for us

Somerville · 16/01/2019 21:30

But there not generally the young adults who have dependents though are they Somerville. Which is where this conversation started.

Many people with disabilities and life limiting conditions have children actually, Barbarian. I meet them often through my voluntary work at the hospice that supported my family through Dh1’s death.

Missillusioned · 16/01/2019 21:35

Is it possible to insure the life of an ex spouse? It occurred to me that if he dies the child maintenance stops. If we were still married his life insurance would cover him, but now I assume it would pay out to someone else.

We are not on speaking terms, so I assume I couldn't take out a policy on him without his cooperation

BarbarianMum · 16/01/2019 21:36

Disabilities don't generally stop you getting life insurance unless they are life limiting. And if you choose to have children with someone you know has a life limiting condition and who therefore cant get life insurance then it would be reasonable to assume you have an alternative plan to support them.

Ime the people I know who have severely life limiting conditions and children had their children before diagnosis.

MrsKoala · 16/01/2019 21:40

DH and I have life and critical illness cover and went thru a broker but the cheapest we could find is £300 a month because DH has a dangerous job and I have pre existing medical conditions. I was even turned down by some for having migraines when I was 14. Also what I am actually most likely to get ill and die from isn't covered.

namechangedtoday15 · 16/01/2019 21:41

I agree that its insensitive in the aftermath of a death, but not insensitive before hand. There is an advert where a mother of 2 children (think it's called Polly something) lost her husband suddenly- she looks to be in late 20s / 30s. Says they had car insurance, phone insurance etc but never had life insurance. Quite moving really.

DH has had cancer twice (first time as a 22 yr old student) so all of the policies we have - exclude his type of cancer and are very expensive. But to us, we see it as a kind of utility / obligatory monthly payment- mortgage, gas, electricity, water, life insurance etc. I couldn't afford our house in the event of his death, particularly as I'd have to reduce my hours or even stop working to care for 3 grieving children. Having been with H when hes had cancer (fortunately healthy now), potentially losing the house / having major financial worries on top of a death would have been hell.

BeachtheButler · 16/01/2019 21:41

My answer was that I sold life insurance; I didn't buy it.

Oldraver · 16/01/2019 21:42

Funnily enough I had the cold call insurance guys (though they denied cold calling) while I was in the car. Answered the basic questions then got the condescending 'why dont you have life insurance, anything could happen to anyone at anytime'etc spiel.

I wasn't in the mood for telling them that actually 'anything' has already happened and one of the many reasons I dont have insurance is because mine was effectively cancelled when late DH'S paid out.

tenbob · 16/01/2019 21:43

Like tiredeyes I’ve never been asked if I have life insurance, bar once by a mortgage broker trying to sell me some

Who are all these people going around asking people about their insurance? Confused

(Don’t have life insurance, but have death in service via work so don’t have any plans to take out a policy any time soon)