To not want to go on abroad Hen Party.

[ScooterMum19]

I am due to be a bridesmaid later this year for one of my bestest friends. Bridesmaids are now discussing hen party arrangements and I know my friend would like to go abroad. I have an intense fear of going to another country and being away from my children so really don't want to go. I also don't think it's fair on DH to come along and stat nearby on his own with kids.

As much as I would defend my friend as a nice person,I do think she will take the view that it's my bridesmaid duty to go (a commeny was mafe about how one of the pregnany bridesmaids 'could have waited until after the wedding to have a baby'! How would you handle it?

Simple. I just wouldn't go. End of

'Sorry I can't afford it' 'Sorry I can't spare the time away from home' or the Mumsnet favourite 'Sorry that doesn't work for me'
If she has a problem then it's her problem, not yours. A really decent person would understand that anything more than a local cheap meal out with notice (and assuming you have access to babysitters, don't have to work at that point and don't have anxiety or issues around food) can be refused without offence being taken.

"I don't want to come, sorry" and if necessary "If you'd like me to step aside as bridesmaid, I'm happy to do that".

I also don't think it's fair on DH to come along and stat nearby on his own with kids.

Typically your husband and children are not part of the arrangements. They would be at home.

Just say you can't afford it. Or, you could just tell the truth. If she's really one of your "bestest friends", she won't mind.

If you dread going abroad so much, I'd guess you haven't got a valid passport. Is she really expecting you to get one just for this occasion? (Actually, having read the comments she's previously made, she probably would)
But the answers RangeRider has suggested are all equally valid.
I'm sure DH will back you up; won't be much fun for him!

YANBU, but I wouldn't want to go to a hen do if it was in my own living room.

Just be honest and so you won't be going because you don't want to be away from your children.

If she pushes you then she's being a dick.