WIBU to outsource all things domestic?

[ChangementDeNom]

We're a working couple, with two DCs and after a long, hard look at our lives I'm realising that we can't continue like this - everything's such a slog. We just can't manage everything on our own and it's making us stressed and unhappy trying to do it all; cleaning (even with a weekly cleaner), laundry (bane of my life), home maintenance etc - it's getting on top of us and leaves us little stress-free family time together.

I think we're doing some of the right things already - I declutter pretty ruthlessly so we don't have loads of stuff (although it still multiplies somehow), we do all our grocery shopping online, minimal ironing, DP batch cooks for the kids at the weekend, and I've arranged to work from home 1-2 days a week to catch up, but it's not enough. I think we're at the point where we need to throw money at the situation.

We used to have a fantastic full-time nanny who filled a lot of the gaps for us but we let her go about 18 months ago once both DCs were in school full-time and we couldn't justify the expense. While it's been nice to have a lot more disposable income, it has opened our eyes to how much harder things are without help.

Can you give me some suggestions / inspiration of which bits to get extra help with? If you have a housekeeper or similar, what do they do? Neither of us have DIY skills so I'm already on the lookout for a good handyman but they're impossible to find around here!

(And I'm not sure the most polite way to say this but I know from bitter experience that some people on MN simply don't like the idea of working mothers / domestic help etc so if the very idea seems abhorrent to you then that's absolutely fine, no need to comment. Thanks so much!)

Off point I know, but in South Africa they still have housekeepers, maids and chauffeurs. It's cheap to live out e.

God, I'd love to do this. Particularly maintenance things like repairs and redecorating. Nothing gets done in our house and it's at least partly down to the headspace required to find a tradesperson, organise them coming, think about materials and cost etc etc… I'd love someone to just notice things that need doing and sort them out.

I'd also like someone to think of what to cook, shop for it and cook it for me. I don't dislike cooking per se, but thinking of things and then making them every single day is a drag.

there so maybe you should consider moving, OP? Sounds good to me!

Anything you could possibly want is available in North London, but at a cost.
You need a daily housekeeper who will tidy, clean, wash, iron and put away. Change bed linen and towels. Leave a meal ready to put in oven, prepare veg and salad etc.
However, if you want this done and your house to run smoothly with minimum effort from yourself it will cost you at least £200pw. 4 hours per day, 5 days per week.

If funds allowed I would double my cleaner’s time, for laundry stuff, and get someone to meal plan and cook! As Michelle Obama did when they first got enough cash.

Bet your DP doesn’t actually do 50%. Don’t underestimate the workload and stress of the mental load, which you say falls to you.

Eg you say “I” declutter and tidy ahead of the cleaner and he cooks. Does he also do the shop and meal plan?