24, surprise baby, career sacrifice?

[JR99993]

Recently me and my boyfriend of two years found out I was pregnant. This was a MASSIVE surprise and after we got over it we are starting to be excited (and terrified).

I was really apprehensive to tell my work, I work in banking - I've been referred to as the baby/child of the team since I joined two years ago and I am the youngest.

I told my boss yesterday and she was genuinely gobsmacked. I also told some of my colleagues I'm close to and had a similar reaction. Does anyone have any advice on this? I just feel like I'm being met with a lot of negativity on the situation.

Additionally I have 3 exams left to complete to be a qualified accountant - I'm going to do two before baby arrives and hope to do one when I'm on maternity. My boss basically has said that this is poor planning, I need to pass them before I come back to work to be on schedule. Is this a legal requirement, does being pregnant affect your employment contract?

Finally I want to go to four days when I return from maternity (haven't mentioned this yet) do you think this will majorly affect my career?

Hope this all made sense and thank you x

For a bit of clarification on my situation - I think I was a little bit of the wonder child (not in a big-headed way direct quote.) They took me on for an Internship and fought HR to be allowed the resourcing to take me full time post uni.

I feel I may of let them down a little, in there expectation....

My boyfriend and I can (just about) afford the baby, and are of the opinion that it was in our 'plan' it has just come a little early.

Banking is infamously cut throat, I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that!
Do the exams have a deadline that they all need to be completed in x months. I did a professional qualification recently and had to complete all the exams within 12 months or I’d need to start again. Could that be her concern?

Also with regards to 4 days I believe you can request it but they aren’t obliged to grant you it.

I had this when I accidentally got pregnant at your age. I was working in the City (although not a banker)

WRT pregnancy affecting your contracy of employment. No, it shouldn’t do and clearly any discrimination arising from your pregnancy could give rise to a claim.

That being said, I would try and complete all your exams prior to mat leave as your brain turns to mush after having a baby, along with sleepless nights.

Part time working/mat leave does tend to affect your career trajectory. It shouldn’t, but it does in most cases. For me, I ended up leaving the job I was in and settling for a lesser (easier) job for a while. It took about 5 years for my career to recover. I did have another DC during that time though!

The exams don't expire, I'm basically already enrolled for all 3 exams - but exam number three is 4 weeks after the baby is due. I could potentially take two exams at once but I would be 8 months pregnant.
Obviously if I had planned the baby I would of planned better haha.

Other people in the office are on 4 days, I'm just not sure whether to request it before I go on maternity leave, or after?

I'm viewing it as completing two years of career goals in four years then it recovering when the baby starts school... I'm a planner...

I got pregnant at 25 in the middle of my chartered secretary (ICSA) exams. I took the final exams when I was on maternity leave and went back to work full-time when DS was 8 months (this was over 20 years ago when maternity leave wasn't quite as generous as now).

I have a successful career and a wonderful (now 24 year old) DS and I also have the time to enjoy my freedom and take on new challenges so for me, having a child quite young worked out really well.

It might present some difficulties but I just wanted to show you a success story. Best of luck and congratulations.

Just continue you on as you are - you don't need their approval and igore their disapproval. This is between you and your boyfriend only.

By the way I had 1 final module of an MBA when I fell pregant, I took the finals 6 weeks after birth of twins and got a distinction. You have to work hard, it can be done.

No idea about your exams. No experience in accounting, but I would apply yourself as hard as you can and get them out of the way sooner rather than later. Everything is a million times easier to do when you’re pregnant than it is with no free time and on two hours of sleep once baby is here.

But for the bigger question, your career will be fine. Most women take time out for children at some point. If they aren’t doing it now, your peers will be one day. When they’re on a break, you’ll be zooming ahead because you already had your time.

I had my first in the middle of doing a PhD. Took a year off, came back part time and finished up. Graduated and worked for a year, then had another baby and took another year off. Every industry is different, but it’s had no negative effect on my career at all. If anything, it’s been to my advantage. I’m way more efficient and (out of necessity) have to be more driven than my colleagues. I’m coming back from maternity leave #2 to big promotion and also to only working 3 days a week to start. Only good things have come of it.

What I would say makes a difference though is having access to whatever childcare you need (whether that’s paid or through family help), and also having a partner who is on board and values your career equally. My dh is cutting to four days a week for a month or two so I can start my new job on time as our nursery can’t squeeze us into enough days right now. If he was a dickhead who wouldn’t take a pay cut so I could get my promotion, I wouldn’t have the support I needed to make it work, so that’s really key.

You’ll be fine though! And congratulations!

Request the four days before you come back, not before you leave.

You'll be fine OP. Though definitely try and get as much done for exams as possible before baby comes. I worked 4 days a week after my first mat leave and tbh, I wouldn't even class it as part time. You're in the office 80% of the working week so still very visible to colleagues and my workload was exactly the same as it was when full time. So job was a bit more time pressured but it worked for our family as had more days with the LO.

Thank you! Think I may potentially try and move the final exam back 3 months - and try and do the majority of the prep pre birth - and dedicate an hour a day to study (with assistance from my boyf/mum for childcare).

My boyfriend and I currently earn similar amounts but live in central London so the real challenge is affordable baby friendly housing and then commuting on top of that. One of us has to work full time to cover housing and basic living costs and the other to pay for everything else...we think. So the plan is for him to go to four day on condensed hours and me four days on regular hours.

I'm not 100% sure on logistics of maternity leave, I do have meeting next week with HR/my manager regarding it!

Would you be promoted on completion of your exams? Maybe by “on schedule” your boss was referring to when they’d expect you to be promoted to a qualified position? Are you on a training contract which is a fixed term? Might be worth a phone call to HR to understand the details.

Also, would your mat leave impact your qualification? I had to log 450 days of relevant experience in my 3 year training contract alongside passing my exams so in your situation would have had to notify the institute and extend my training contract.

Regarding the negativity, I would bring up the subject positively eg
You: I've got some exciting news, I'm pregnant.
Them:
You: I know, it's fantastic isn't it!

If they are negative then challenge it. Remind them of how long you'll be in the work force, you can climb the ladder in a few years and that 20s wasn't young to gave a baby a generation ago.

I already have the relevant hours logged because I did 6 months probation before I started my exams! I think it's just that they set time periods and they technically can fire you if you don't pass on schedule - obviously I assume having a baby would be a reason to go on a slight pause.

I basically need to discuss it with HR! Along with contacting my program co-ord to see what can be done.