I am not Mary Poppins, and I don't like being put in this position!

[Peleus]

When I take DC to school, we are usually in the playground 10 minutes before the bell goes so as to get a parking space. We are usually the first there, and the playground is unsupervised until the bell goes. Another parent in DC's class arrives the same time as us, bringing with them another child, which obviously they have assumed duty of care for. They then also join the line (school discourages chasing around before lessons.) As soon as we appear, the parent shoots off, and doesn't even ask me if I mind looking out for their child and the one they are supposed to bee looking after. This morning, yet another parent left his DC, but he doesn't do it every day and I didn't mind because he asked! I was the only parent there. All the children (my own DC included) got overexcited while in the line and there was some horseplay. I could see that there was potential for someone to get hurt and so made a judgement call to speak to the children about this. But I don't like being put in this position. I am there to make sure my own DC goes into school safely, not to oversee other people's DCs.

I foresee being placed in this position most days, especially as most parents arrive with their DCs just as the bell goes.
We could arrive later, but then parking would be harder with the potential to actually arrive late.

Should I tell school about this? I don't relish a confrontation with the parent.

Absolutely wait in the car and go in just before bell rings to line up. Or tell the parents the kids aren't supervised til the bell rings. If they indicate you being there tell them you are there for your own child only.

Stay in the car until the gates open if you can't say, "Wait. Please stay. I'm not looking after your child, I'm looking after my own, thank you."

And tell the school parents are doing this.

Gosh, when my kids were at primary school the playground was supervised from 8.30am onwards until the whistle was blown at 8.45am.

I left them unaccompanied from Juniors (year 3) onwards. In fact paretns were not allowed in the year 3 playground.

@Bloodybridget

I don't understand why parents have to supervise their children in the playground. Surely most parents need to get going to work and don't have time to hang around. Never happened in my day, we were sent through the gate and that was it, I guess there must have been teachers in the playground.

Where I work no child can be left unattended before or after school, unless year 6 and have written permission. Teachers are in the class/meetings getting lessons ready etc. If a child was hurt or went missing there would be nobody supervising.

@lou1221 My DD is 5 and her school has one gate which is manned by staff from the moment it's opened and is closed when the bell rings.

Everyone just drops their child and goes. I've never understood the need for parents to wait around. I leave to go for work but some of DDs classmates mums wait until after the bell has rung and watched their child go (with staff) up the stairs and into the school.

It's a village school with little parking. Just drop your child of and go.

These other kids are not your responsibility. Tell the HT children are being left unsupervised in the playground.

Our primary has 2 manned gates, KS1 and KS2. There are no extra staff in the playground. They are all inside preparing classrooms etc.

At our school you can leave your child unsupervised from year 3 but KS1 has to have an adult to monitor a child. There have been complaints when children have clearly been left with no-one watching and injuries have been inflicted on other children.

It is a 3 form entry so a big primary and a lot of children running around.

I would wait in the car and explain that you can't always be first in the line and do it as a game of guessing who will be first instead.

Or arrive, wait for them to arrive, then go back to the car with your child making it very obvious you are not supervising left child

And yes, everyone has somewhere to go but it doesn't mean you dump a 6 year old.

I would be late a few mornings not after the bell late but as in last person there late. I would then do it every so often so the mum realises that you may not be there. Also speak to the school and get them to remind people there children are there responsibility.

Or maybe you could just help out seeing as you're standing there anyway? There seem to be a lot of convoluted ideas just to avoid helping someone out with no cost to you.

Lou, yes I understand that teaching staff are busy before school starts, but schools could have playground supervisors on for say, twenty minutes before starting time (I know, budgets, schools all completely broke, etc - just saying parents having to hang around is a problem).

I would speak to the school, as it's not safe for parents to drop and go.
No disrespect but you could be anyone.
They will continue to do it if you don't say anything.
Then as pps suggest, stay in your car until the bell goes.

I think recently is either the mother in question or She's Royally taking the piss

I'm not thanks but I often wait with other parent's children if they have to dash off because - well, why not? It helps someone out for zero effort whereas you are actively trying to make life hard for yourself in case you accidentally help someone. Nice lesson.

Me !!!! This isn't my thread

Also I don't see anyone running around like a blue arse fly for me

I meant OP sorry.

But no-one’s asked you to take responsibility for their children, you seem to have taken it upon yourself to do.

School’s policies on these things differ. If you’re concerned, mention to the teacher that their are unsupervised children lining up/ running about.

DS’s school makes clear that the playground is unsupervised in the morning and it is not liable but does not insist that parents stay.

Just supervise your own child let the other children do what they like, no one has asked you to.
If you don't want to be in that position stay in the car longer or say something to the teachers.

YOU are the one assuming responsibility. Don’t. Just mind your own child and leave the other parents to make their own decisions.

If the school has parking issues, they need to sort something out if they expect all parents to stay until the bell goes. Our school started a drop off zone.

@Elfinablender

Park. Stay in car and listen to radio. Go in with bell. Job done.

Does anyone else love it when an AIBU is solved in the first response?

I don't think legally they can insist you stay anymore than they can stop you sending a P4 on their own and if you send a letter in saying your child has permission to walk home alone, they can't really keep them
there is a difference between school policy and the actual law
at DD school parents aren't allowed in playground, when she was in P1-2 I waited until bell went in P3 I made sure I walked her to playground now she jumps out of the car and goes up drive herself, same on the way home only P1 personally handed over to parent P2 &P3 teacher comes to playground all older children (p4-7) just go back into school if who they were expecting isn't there or they go home alone, the janitor ensures that those you go by school bus are put on the bus

@Thesnobbymiddleclassone and @bloodybridgit

If course different schools have different policies, we are a large 4 form entry town school, getting close to a 1000 pupils. Inc nursery. With 720 students not allowed to be left unattended. It probably is to do with budgets etc but we have no breakfast club facility and Ta's do not get paid before 8.45, yet doors open at 8.35. Therefore staff supervising is not going to happen.

Where I work no child can be left unattended before or after school, unless year 6 and have written permission.

No wonder we are raising another generation of fucking snowflakes who can't even walk to school in the rain.
That's ridiculous.

@GalacticChickenShit

Errr, where did I say they can't walk to school in the rain? Y6 are 10 and 11 year olds, hopefully they have learnt road sense, and are, with parental permission allowed to walk, run, bike or whatever to school in whatever weather is occurring. However, younger children are still allowed to do the same as above. But they need an adult with them.
I don't make the school rules, but living in a busy town, with major link roads to motorways, I wouldn't want to see a child get hurt crossing the road, because they were on their own.

Where I work no child can be left unattended before or after school, unless year 6 and have written permission.

No wonder we are raising another generation of fucking snowflakes who can't even walk to school in the rain.
^That's

We also live in a compensation culture so you can't blame the school for covering their backs and putting it in black and white that there is no supervision or responsibility on the schools part before a specified time.