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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to request a term time family holiday?

43 replies

Mamalexi343 · 14/01/2019 18:09

We sent in an application to the headmaster for a term time family holiday which has come back denied.

The issue we have is that my DH works during all school holidays, they go in and do work on the school's when no one is there and they do this all over the country, it's their busiest times of year and he's not allowed to take time off work during these times.

He works 6 days a week and has 3 days off at Christmas and is allowed a week off in June, so we barely see him or get to spend time as a family. Why should my DD have to miss out on something a lot of her friends get just because her dad has to make a living?

Our DD is in year one and I'd already checked the week we want to go isn't conflicting with anything at the school and I stated that I was more than happy to take any schoolwork with us so she didn't fall behind however the headteacher has just said no unauthorised absence.

My DH is livid and has said he's gonna go up to the school and have words so naturally I've had to say I'll go but I've no idea how to word it all, AIBU? I understand the school's point of view and they have procedures to follow but at the same time if I've timed it well and agreed to take work with us why is it an issue?

I've had nothing but issues with this school since she started at the nursery there 2 years ago the latest being a head and back injury that they didn't follow procedures and made her get up, walk it off and gave her water for shock, didn't even tell me it'd happened, I found out from her and when confronted they said she 'seemed fine' I ended up in hospital with her for 4 days, this school is slowly sucking the life out of me.

Sorry for the long rant I just don't really know what to do.

OP posts:

babysharkah · 14/01/2019 18:33

Our school don't authorise term time leave for anything. If the council decide to fine then so be it.

It's not really the school's issue what your dh does for a living, you won't be able to pull them out as they progress up.

Grimbles · 14/01/2019 18:36

What's the usual deal with going on holiday in the term? Do you warn the school in advance and say you are going on holiday, or just call in sick the day before or similar?

Rainbowcolours1 · 14/01/2019 18:37

It will be unauthorised. You need to look at your local authority policy regarding prosecution. In my authority it is a third fine in any rolling twelve month period that will automatically result in prosecution, that includes fines for holidays and for persistent absence.
I'm a head, I do believe children should be in school and ultimately I'm held to account for the attendance of my pupils. However I prefer parents to be honest and let us know if they are going on holiday...which they do. As pp have said even paying the fine still results in savings for the majority of holidays.
The main gripe I get is from staff, not just teachers, who have to take holidays at the most expensive times of year and if with a partner who can't take holidays in school holiday time then they just don't get a holiday.

Original poster

Mamalexi343 · 14/01/2019 18:37

I'm currently working on my career so then he can change his job so we aren't planning on having to do this for long, we're doing it this year but not next year and by the year after we should have sorted our jobs out so we can go during school holiday.

OP posts:

dottycat123 · 14/01/2019 18:43

Slightly aside but your dh is not getting the minimum legal holiday entitlement if in the UK.

Albatross26 · 14/01/2019 18:44

Attendance officer here. We refer any holiday of five days of over to the council for a fixed penalty notice. No holiday is ever authorised, the head teacher is bound by government guidelines. The only absences we authorise are close family funerals or weddings. Try not to take it personally, it's the same for everyone 🙂

swimmerforlife · 14/01/2019 18:45

Absolutely ridiculous rule, I can understand it as secondary but not for primary.

I have done it twice, once in reception and second time year 1 (got a fine that year) both for about 10 days, both times were still purely for family reasons too.

I did not grow up in the UK and at school even during exam years kids went on holidays / exchanges and still passed exams with flying colours

TeenTimesTwo · 14/01/2019 18:46

If you didn't make it clear that your DH isn't allowed holiday time holidays then maybe try again making it clear, and enclosing employer's letter. Otherwise just go for it.

PoutySprout · 14/01/2019 18:47

He works 6 days a week and has 3 days off at Christmas and is allowed a week off in June, so we barely see him

If he’s employed he is legally entitled to a minimum of 5.6 weeks off per year.

madeyemoodysmum · 14/01/2019 18:50

Go and pay the fine. As long as you pay it it will be ok and enjoy your holiday.

champagneplanet · 14/01/2019 18:51

Just book and go and be prepared to pay the fine.

We went a few months ago and I didn't even request it as I knew it wouldn't be granted, I just wrote a letter to the teacher before we went to explain the absence. Teacher said have a nice time, I wish I could do the same!

We haven't had a fine so far, just a warning that they were going to report us to the LA. DDs attendance has been above 97% every year through so we may have got away with it this time.

Satsumaeater · 14/01/2019 18:52

It does sound like your DH isn't getting adequate holiday entitlement.

But anyway go away for a week because there are no fines for 5 days or less.

TulipsInbloom1 · 14/01/2019 18:53

One week in June and three days in December is not the minimum entitlement.

maddiemookins16mum · 14/01/2019 18:59

They have to say no.
Book it, take her, pay the fine.

onlyoneoftheregimentinstep · 14/01/2019 19:06

Headteachers do not have the power to authorise holidays. If you're going to go, you'll have to suck up a fine. Please don't ask for work to take though - teachers have enough to do without preparing extra stuff for people who are breaking the rules.

BunsOfAnarchy · 14/01/2019 19:08

Slight deviation - but your DH only gets 9 days a year holiday? Thats pretty ridiculous! And im sure pretty illegal too.

caringdenise009 · 14/01/2019 19:16

As a parent whose child was in primary when this nonsense was first introduced, and was able to shrug at the unauthorised absence rubbish, I would say don't ask. Ring them in sick,and yourself too. Don't put stuff on Facebook. Also attend the governors meetings and raise your objections to this stupid rule, the minutes of the meeting will be sent to the LA. Keep attending the meetings until you have a reply to your specific reasons why parents who are not allowed by their employers to have school holiday leave are deprived of family holidays. If enough parents do this, and write to their MP as well, maybe this madness will stop.

caringdenise009 · 14/01/2019 19:17

And to echo pp I'm a bit suspicious of your husbands holidays.

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