To never sit still whilst my children are with my ex?!

[Kikipost]

My two children are with my ex husband fortnightly. Over those two weekends I. Do. Not. Stop.

I write a to do list on Friday afternoon and the weekend when they are with him is constant. Cleaning house, changing beds, organising their bedrooms, ensuring completely up to date on any and all personal and house admin, post office for any eBay sales, fitting in one yoga class and one run, grocery shop, recycling to the dump, and always one “big job” ie clear out shed or sort loft for example

I happily flake at 7pm and curl up and completely relax.

But if I do that before evening I feel guilty. As though I shouldn’t be relaxing because somehow that makes me a shit mum that I’m relaxing whilst my children are with my ex.

The upside is that I’m very on top of life and housework (my cleaner arrives on a Monday and I think she twiddles her thumbs!) and I do enjoy being active and focused BUT I do wish I could kick back with the paper without low level guilt.

Any one feel the same?

Unfortunately I can't really comment as a mum of 4 dc I never get time away from them. Part of me would like to think I'd just sit in my pj's, watch TV, have a bath, and just relax but in reality I think I would be more like you. Not because I would feel guilty but just because I would need something to do and it would be my only time to have a spotless home and actually have a couple of days to enjoy it lol

I try and split my time so I choose a couple of jobs and I usually have a short rest between and then after I have achieved them I usually slob on the sofa for a while.

same as Exhaustedmummy1811 Also im a mum of 4 and ex is absent so they dont go to him but if they did I would be doing all the things you do, Basically all the things I dont get much time to do whilst they are here!

I used to be the same then I started doing everything on the Friday night and would stay up cleaning. Then I'd usually be finished Saturday afternoon. Then I'd get a nice bath and unwind with a bottle of wine. Sometimes still in the bath with my iPad balanced between the sink taps 

He doesn't have her anymore so now I just run round like a blue arsed fly all week.

Relaxing and doing as you please wouldnt make you a shit mum. However, it would give me great pleasure to have the opportunity to do all of those things if I had child free time. If you are happy, keep doing as you are. If you feel like you need permission to do something else without being made to feel a bad mum, well, in the nicest possible way - YABVU. Do you think your ex stresses about filling his time with kid/house related stuff when they are with you? Nope! Your kids are with their dad, hopefully happy. Enjoy your time however you see fit.

I’m sitting down with a cup of tea and the paper! They’re back in an hour.

I like the sense of being on top of everything but I just wish that I didn’t feel so damn guilty if I sit down and watch a bit of TV at 2pm on a Saturday!